Man of Justice
by Tauna Petit-Strawn
Summary: A man from their past shows up on the ranch causing old memories to resurface. After storming out of the house Nick tells Heath the story..the story is centered on Jarrod. I stink at summaries, please read anyway. Genre always subject to change.
1. Chapter 1

**Man of Justice**

**I do not own The Big Valley nor any of the original Barkle**_**y**_**s.**

**Chapter One**

Heath and Audra were sitting in the living room relaxing after a full morning's schedule, when a knock came on the door. Heath took the last bite of the apple he'd been eating, threw the core into the empty fireplace and went to answer it. The woman on the other side of the door looked a bit nervous, but the man standing next to her looked down right uncomfortable as he turned his hat around in his hands. "Can I help you?" Heath asked the visitors; a white haired gentleman and a dark haired woman, who looked to be in her early forties.

"We were hoping to talk to Jarrod Barkley, along with Nick and Victoria." The man stopped turning his hat, straightened up to his full height, and did his best to keep any waver out of his voice. Heath wondered what was up…the couple sure was an anxious pair. "Jarrod's not home right now," Heath answered as he stepped aside, "But, he's due in any time. Mother and Nick are here though. Come on in."

The strangers followed him in into the living room where, by this time, Audra was standing ready to meet their guests. "Hello…" It was all Audra got out as Nick, who had been upstairs, appeared in the entrance way of the living room.

Heath and Audra were puzzled Nick stared at the gentleman for a moment, as if he was trying to decide if he knew their visitor or not. Slowly, like light being allowed to enter into a darkened room where the curtain is pulled to the sides, recognition began to appear in Nick's eyes. His siblings were then shocked to see his facial expressions go from recognition to one of pure distain and revulsion. The explosion that came from their brother was louder than a whole wagon load of dynamite that had just gone off. "What in the hell are you doin' here! You were told years ago you weren't welcome back on this ranch and you're sure not welcome now!" Nick headed towards the man only to have Victoria, who had hurried into the room the moment she heard her son start to holler, step in front in between him and their visitors.

"Nick!" Victoria warned, almost shouting herself. She too looked very much out of sorts, once she realized who their visitors were. Memories from the past came rushing to the front of her mind. Memories; ones she was sure she had quite successfully hidden back to the storage room of her mind. How could she do anything else when the events had been so painful at the time? "What _are_ you doing here, Jacob? What do you want?" There was suspicion in her eyes and anger in her voice. She couldn't help it. While she had not seen the man called Jacob Michael for many years, she still recalled how he'd thought only of himself, what he wanted and what it had cost her family.

The old man sighed. What had he come for? It's not like he could turn back the clock of time and erase the stupidity and pride that had been his main companions so many years ago; two things that had wound up bringing nothing but trials and heartache to the Barkleys. Events long passed but had drastically changed Tom and Victoria's two young sons; one into a man who hit first and asked questions later…unlike the calm, patient young boy that had once existed, the other to a man driven to seek justice, sometimes at a high cost…so different from the almost fourteen year old boy that dreamt of being a rancher like his father. He'd only found out about these changes on his way through Stockton, along with the fact that Tom had been died years ago. "To say I'm sorry," he finally spoke, "to see if there is any way at all, I can make amends."

While Victoria could see the sincere remorse in the man's eyes, Nick wasn't having any of it. He exploded again, "How do you expect to make amends? The damage was done years ago! Or have you invented some way to go back in time and change things!" He took a step towards Mr. Michael only to find his mother's hand on his arm.

Because she could see Jacob's sincerity, she was willing to make peace with the man, but wasn't sure they'd be able to do that if Nick refused to calm down. "Nick," she spoke gently, but firmly, "nothing good is going to come of this if you don't listen."

Again, Nick roared. "Listen to what? His lies, his excuses? He betrayed father's trust! Thanks to him we lost Jarrod for well over a year! Do we need to thank him for days that went on and on with Father gone looking for Jarrod? For weeks and months of having to listen to you and father crying behind closed doors because father came back empty handed? Then finally…" Nick took a breath and then began yelling again,"…FINALLY to get him back only to find ourselves with another battle on our hands…helping Jarrod re-adjust to the life he never should have been taking from and accepting the fact that he'd never be working side by side, for hours on end, with Father and me! " Nick searched his mother's eyes, as he pointed at the older man and with biting fury continued, "My word! Didn't you have enough to deal with…I mean by the time he got back not only did you have Audra to take care of but Eugene as well! The law should have left him in that prison they sent him to!" His face was full of disbelief as he continued shooting out one question after another.

While Nick's questions were being thrown about the room one after the other, without any expectation of a valid answer as far as Nick was concerned, Audra looked at her brother in confusion. What was he talking about? She racked her brain to see if she could pull up an incident where her mother told her stories when Jarrod wasn't with them; she failed of course. Heath, never having heard of Jarrod being missing for any length of time, was just as perplexed.

Victoria would have tried again to get Nick to calm down only she didn't have to. The front door opened and Jarrod walked in. The effect was immediate; Nick's rampage stopped dead in its tracks. Not seeing their guests at first, Jarrod gave Nick a grin and said, as he headed for his brother, "What's got you so riled..." he never finished his sentence as he froze in his tracks.

Jarrod was at first speechless. He couldn't believe what his eyes saw, feeling everything from shock, disbelief to rage and pity… all were fighting for every nerve in his body. Like his mother and Nick, the gate to his memories swung open and let events from long ago rush forward. He didn't know whether or not to be polite and see what the man wanted or to forget his manners and have his fist connect to the man's jaw. Though it wasn't hard to figure out what Nick wanted. If any conversation was to be had with Jacob Michael, Nick could not be in the room. Jarrod put down his brief case and looked at Nick. "McCall said he needs you outside." Okay, so McCall had said he could wait if he had to, but Jarrod wasn't going to tell Nick that.

Nick glared at Jacob and headed for the door.


	2. Story Begins

**Man of Justice**

**I do not own The Big Valley or any of the original Barkle**_**y**_**s.**

**Chapter Two **

Nick was resting his arms on the top of the corral fence sitting near the barn and leaning forward slightly, when Heath walked up beside him. Somehow, he wasn't surprised his blonde haired brother had seen fit to come and join him instead of staying with Jarrod and his mother. "Guess you want to know what happened and why I reacted so strongly to that…" he paused and clenched his fists, "…that man, if I have to call him that!"

Heath was curious; however he was more concerned about his brother. He too leaned on the fence, though his back was against it and his elbows resting on top the fence. He was face to face with his brother and followed his brooding gaze. "If you want to talk about it, I'm here. If not, we can just as easily do something else."

Nick gave a small snort and lifted his hands to his forehead. "Keep in mind, a lot of what I am going to tell you is what Jarrod himself told us after it was all over or from discussions he and I had on more than one occasion. Mind you, it took him years to tell us a lot of it."

Heath simply nodded and waited. What else was there to do?

Once Heath nodded, Nick began speaking again. "Jarrod was almost fourteen, I had just turned ten and Audra," he pulled his hands away from his head and looked at Heath, "She had just turned one and had just began to walk." He turned around, looked at the house off in the distance, his eyes taking on the look of a man looking through a glass window into another time and place.

_The wind was starting to blow in front of the three bedroom home Tom and Victoria, or Torie as her husband called her, shared, along with their children, Jarrod, Nick and Audra. Victoria was inside with her beautiful blonde hair little girl, while almost fourteen year old Jarrod and ten year old Nick played outside. Jarrod was too busy practicing roping a "steer"…actually a wooden cow his father's new foreman, a twenty-five year old man by the name of Duke McCall, had built for the children. Nick was right beside him doing his best to do the same._

_"Jarrod…" Nick said as the rope he threw landed on the ground only inches away from "cow", "think I'll ever get the hang of this?"_

_Jarrod grinned from ear to ear, "Sure, you're already getting closer to it every day." It was a fact; Nick had missed by miles for weeks and then feet, now it was almost there. His older brother was excited that Nick was making such rapid progress. "You'll have it down in no time at all; you're a natural." It made his heart sing as he saw the grin that came upon his little brother's face._

_"Father says we will be movin' soon." Nick gathered up his rope, rolled it up, leaving just enough to so he could begin twirling it in the air, "Think we'll like the new house?" The words came out of his mouth as the rope flew through the air and actually landed around the "cow's" neck. "YIPEE!" Nick's holler could be heard from one end of the ranch to the others. Jarrod grinned and their mother came flying out of the front door._

_"It's okay, mother!" Jarrod hollered the moment he saw her. "Nick just roped his first cow!" He had to stifle a laugh at the way their mother threw her hands up in the air, turned around and went back inside. If his mother ever went gray, white or started sporting silver hair, he was sure he or his brother would be the cause of it._

_"So, do you think we'll like the new house?" Nick retrieved his rope and looked at Jarrod unable to keep a slight trace of fear out of his voice._

_Jarrod heard the fear and sighed. He knew where his brother's fears were coming from. Young Nick had the patience of a saint; that being the case, why was he letting mere dreams frighten him so much? "Have one of those dreams again last night, huh?" Jarrod asked._

_Jarrod started walking to the house,as the wind was really beginning to pick up, the older Barkley figured it as best to get indoors before it got worse. Nick was right behind him._

_"Yep," Nick didn't like it; he didn't like it. He wanted them to go way, "It keeps changing my plans!" The small humph from Nick had Jarrod smiling._

_"Why don't you tell me what the dream is about? Maybe, I can figure out what's bothering you." It's not that he thought he was an expert at interpreting dreams; he didn't. Though, if it helped Nick to talk about it; it wouldn't hurt to listen to it either._

_Nick thought it over as the two boys climbed the stairs to their bedroom. "Well in my dream, I'm ridin' with father and you; we start out ridin', but within seconds you're not there. It's just father and me. You finally show back up, but you're different…and you're not. Don't make no sense!"_

_"It doesn't make any sense." Jarrod smiled as he corrected Nick's sentence. He wasn't surprised when his younger brother simply brushed it aside and, with his next sentence, proved just how much he cared about proper English._

_"That's what I said! Weren't you listenin'? Anyhow, it ain't nice for the dream to take you away like that…" he paused and took a breath. "So, what ya think?" he was curious as to what Jarrod might think it meant, if he thought anything about it at all._

_Jarrod had heard his father talking about the fact that he was thinking takeoff taking Nick on the next cattle drive. While it wouldn't be for awhile, and would only be a very short one, the only thing Jarrod could figure out was perhaps, Nick had the first time jitters. "I think you need to relax and stop worrying 'bout your first cattle drive. Things will be all right." Even as he said the words, Jarrod had the funniest feeling come over him, and that worried him. Though, he didn't say a word to Nick. The last thing he needed to do was upset his brother._

Nick stopped talking and, keeping his eyes on the house, said, "Only thing was, something did happen, thanks to that man, that's now back, in our house," his voice rose, "Something did happen!"

Heath said nothing as he watched and listened. It was the best thing he could do for this brother, who obviously needed to get it out. He spied a crate sitting up against the corner of the corral and, pulling it over, sat down. When Heath did that, Nick grabbed the one next to it and did the same. He then picked up the story where he left off.


	3. The Letter

**Man of Justice**

**I do not own The Big Valley nor any of the original Barkle**_**y**_**s.**

**Chapter Three**

_ Rain was falling hard as Tom hurried to shut the barn door. He'd hoped to be done with his work before the storm hit, but one thing after another had delayed him; everything from his horse being spooked and knocking down a fence post in the process; thank goodness he'd been able to stay in the saddle, to having to go the rounds with Mr. Coleman. The man was causing him problems over the water rights Tom had recently successfully obtained. Coleman claimed they had been obtained them illegally. If the sheriff hadn't happened along and verified that he'd personally helped Tom with claim and verified all the procedures were properly done, the man would probably still be at it. Tom secured the barn door, then ran for the front door of his home._

_ "Tom!" Victoria hurried out of the kitchen to help her husband take his coat off. "You're drenched!" Not that she was surprised, it was a statement made more out of concern for her husband's health._

_ "I know." he gave her a quick kiss and went to throw another log on the fire. He could see Nick standing at the top of the stairs looking down at him. Tom grinned and waved for his youngest son. Nick accepted the invite with smiles and ran down the stairs, two at a time, only to be stopped by his mother._

_ "Back up those steps young man! You know better than to come down in such a manner as that." Victoria and Tom suppressed a giggle as their ten year old son screwed up his face and walked back up the stairs. Overall, the child might have patience, but he could be impetuous when he was excited, typical of most children his age. Bolting down the stairs to greet his father was always one of those times. In truth both Tom and Victoria reveled in the repetition of it._

_ When Nick came down the stairs the second time, he walked up to his father and asked, "When are we going to go on the cattle drive?"_

_ Tom chuckled as his son climbed up beside him and waited until the lad had settled down before he answered him. "It won't be for another month yet. You are eager to go, aren't you?" He winked at the son he was sure would be his second cowboy, actually, probably more of a cowboy than Jarrod for that matter. Oh, sure, Jarrod's eyes lit up when he talked about ranching, but Nick's whole being came alive when he did it. Tom was sure that it meant his second son was destined to become a rancher who would make a name for himself someday._

_ "Sure am! I'm gonna show you I can do the job just as good as Jarrod!" "Maybe, better" was a thought he added only to himself. He knew how his mother and father felt about their sons bragging. "Do I get to help with the branding too? I'm old enough; I know I am!" Nick sat as straight as he could as if to stress the statement he was making. It made both his parents smile._

_ "Yes, you are, and we'll be branding all the cattle in a few weeks, shortly before we go on the drive. You can start learning then. In between Jarrod and me, we'll have you brandin' that cattle faster than you ever thought possible. Do you think you can wait patiently for those few weeks?" Tom threw a grin his son's way. He wasn't surprised by the answer he received._

_ "I will wait, might not want ta, but I will!" Nick slid off the couch and ran back up the stairs. "Gonna go tell Jarrod we get to work together! This is gonna be great! I get to work with my brother on the ranch!" He was out of sight before either of his parents could bat an eyelid._

_ Victoria started to say something when Audra, who had been put in her bassinet for a nap earlier, started crying. "Good thing, dinner is in the oven." She headed for the room she shared with Tom and, for the moment, their infant daughter. "I think Audra needs some attention." _

_ His daughter wanting attention? For a split second, Tom imagined Audra as a young woman and boys coming to court her. He quickly shook the thoughts off; he wasn't going to ask for that to happen anytime soon. He stood up and walked over to the desk that sat in the corner of the living room. He picked up an envelope that had arrived at the Stockton post office the day before; it was addressed to both he and Victoria. With everything he'd been trying to get done the past few days, it had remained unopened, as he'd forgot to tell Victoria about it. The letter was from an old friend of theirs, Rose Michael. Walking around the desk, Tom sat down, opened the piece of mail and began reading._

_Dear Tom and Victoria,_

_We hope this short note finds you well. My husband has asked me to write to you and tell you we will be passing through the outskirts of Stockton. We are going to be coming by and see you. Jacob is guiding a small wagon train and the families to the border of Oregon. He says he NEEDS to talk to you. Would you please make some time for us?_

_Sincerely,_

_Rose Michael_

_P.S. He would have written himself, but he is busy organizing supplies and maps for the trip._

_Tom folded the letter back up, his eyebrows turned down. Jacob had often led wagon trains to various destinations so that part of the letter was not unsettling. Only, leaning back in his chair, Tom wondered what did the man want from him that was so urgent? He had to want something or Rose would not have put the word needs all in capital letters. He was still deep in thought when Victoria walked out of the room carrying Audra in her arms._

_ Victoria, looking at the expression on her husband's face, became alarmed. "What is it Tom?" _

_ "I'm not sure, Torie." He handed her the letter and then went to work on some papers he had on the desk, "but I guess we'll find out soon." He said nothing more as his wife took the letter and Audra over to the couch and sat down._


	4. Chapter 4

**Man of Justice**

**I do not own The Big Valley nor any of the original Barkle**_**y**_**s.**

**Chapter Four**

Heath stretched his legs as Nick fell into a moment of silence. They'd been sitting next to the corral for some time. "Want ta move into the shade?" Heath asked, figuring they might as well be shaded from the sun when Nick continued with the story. Nick's only answer was to literally stand up and move to a crate that set under the awning that was attached to the tool shed; Heath followed him. Once both were seated, Nick resumed the story.

_"Hey, Jarrod!" Ten year old Nick ran into the barn and over to where Jarrod was working on a horseshoe. His father's horse needed one, and the young boy had offered to do the job himself. Like his father, he seemed to have a knack of doing quite a number of things._

_ "What is it?" Jarrod continued working as he asked the question. He wanted to have the job done before his father got home from town. After all, he'd heard his parent say the man was bringing visitors home. He didn't want to have company show up and him out still working on a blasted horseshoe._

_ "I had another dream last night. How do I keep them away, the dreams that is?" the younger boy planted himself on top of a nearby bale of hay. Truth was, the boy wanted reassurance that his dream, the one of working the ranch with his brother, would indeed come to pass. After all, Jarrod and he had talked about it on numerous occasions. Every time Nick thought of that dream being destroyed, for whatever reason, he got a sick feeling deep down inside of him. _

_ Jarrod shook his head. What was going on with his brother? What was happening to the secure, confident, patience brother he knew? "Look, Nicolas," Jarrod stopped pounding the sledge hammer against the horseshoe for a second, "I told you before to stop bein' so all fired nervous about the round up. I've been on a few of them, now it's your turn to join in. Don't let first time jitters get in your way!" He started pounding the horseshoe again._

_ Nick was beginning to disagree, but he didn't want to fight his older brother either. He stood up and practically ran up the ladder that led to the loft. There he lay on the hay turning the current dream over in his head. Like all the others he and Jarrod were together, they were working side by side and then all of a sudden he was gone, and he was gone for a long time. When he came back, he was still Jarrod, but not the Jarrod he knew now. _

_ "Hey, Jarrod!" Nick, who had made his way to the edge of the loft, lay on his stomach, his head on his hands, looking down to where his brother was just finishing working._

_ Jarrod bit his tongue and counted to ten. Was someone trying to teach __**him**__ patience? He turned around and looked up at his little brother, asking as he did so, "What is it now?"_

_ "Mother says we're getting' company. Do you know who it is, think mother will be baking a pie before they get here?" Nick loved it when they had company for company meant such treats as the pie he'd just asked about. His mother always baked one when they knew they had visitors coming only question was…what would she cook? _

_ Jarrod again counted to ten. He knew it was normal to for a child to ask questions, but Nick was going to drive him crazy with all of his. "You'd have to ask her; I hope so." He turned around and hit the horseshoe one more time. Finally, he was done. He took the horseshoe and laid it on a nearby table to cool down._

_ "Jarrod," Nick's voice came a third time._

_ Tired from working on the horseshoe and tired of his brother's constant questions, Jarrod whirled around and barked, "What is it now?"_

_ Nick was taken aback. His older brother had never sounded like that with him. He kept back the tears that wanted to come; he was far too old to be cryin' like his baby sister in the house did. He might have succeeded in his efforts, but Jarrod still saw the hurt in Nick's eyes._

_ "I'm sorry, Nick. I'm just tired. What is it?" Jarrod took a step towards the loft only to have Nick pull back._

_ "Never mind; you're busy." Nick's head disappeared. _

_ Feeling he had no choice, Jarrod put down the sledge hammer and headed for the ladder. He had needed a break anyway, and their company hadn't arrived yet. The least he could do was make things right with his brother. Before long, Jarrod was sitting next to Nick in the loft. He laid his arm across the back of Nick's shoulders and asked again, "What is it?"  
><em> 

_ "I don't want to lose you." Nick's loud voice was as quiet as a church mouse. It sent chills down Jarrod's back._

_ "You're not going to lose me; I'm your brother." _

_ While the boys talked in the barn, Tom and Victoria were talking about a second letter they'd received from their friends. Delayed by unforeseen circumstances, Mr. Michael had written a longer, more detailed, letter to the Barkleys. Victoria was now in shock over its contents._

_ "He must be out of his mind!" Victoria wasn't trying to keep her voice low; she was that upset. "I know his boy always helped him in the past, __**and**__ I __**am**__ sorry the lad died last year! However," she put her hands on her hips, "Why ask us to allow Jarrod to help him on that journey? Aren't there other able bodied, and older, men available?"_

_ Tom was torn inside. He knew Victoria had a valid point. Still, Jacob must not be having any luck in finding a man to consent to help him if he had to ask for Jarrod's help. He walked over to the window and looked out; his boys were just coming out of the barn. "He's almost fourteen, Torie. He might want the experience. It's not like we'd be sending him off to fight in some war. All he'd be doing is helping with the horses, needed repairs in camp and, if necessary, maybe a bit of hunting. Jacob assures me that he only needs Jarrod's help to Redding and then he'll put him on a stagecoach back to Stockton. He'll be home just before we're ready to head out for the round up."_

_ Victoria didn't like it. There had to be another way. "When are they supposed to be here?" she kept a steady gaze upon her husband._

_ Tom looked back to the letter in his hands, read it again and said, "They should be here within the next couple of days." They might have continued talking but Nick opened the door and he, along with Jarrod, walked in. That being the case, Victoria only shot Tom a look that said "We __**will**__ talk about this…later!"_


	5. Chapter 5

**Man of Justice**

**I do not own The Big Valley or any of the original Barkle**_**y**_**s.**

**Chapter Five**

_Jacob Michael, it was a name that was rapidly becoming connected to someone who would guide any traveler to their destination; a man who knew the best routes and had a knack of avoiding trouble with the natives, or at least being to avert it by talking with them. That is, in the west he was getting such a reputation. Having never been past the Mississippi, his name meant little in the area beyond it. _

_The wagons Jacob was now leading had been arranged so the families in them could fix a bit of lunch and stretch their legs. The majority of the travelers were heading to Oregon and had no reason to suspect their guide or anyone in the train of any hidden motivations for being with them, not even Jacob's wife, Rose, was suspicious. _

_Matthew Thomas, one of the men in the small company walked up to Jacob, who had just finished climbing out of one of the wagons, "I want to talk to you." he said. Matthew lowered his voice as he spoke to the wagon guide in order to avoid attracting unwanted attention. "Did you know the mostly peaceful Modoc are causing trouble off and on for the whites for some time now? There's folks here that have been talking, and I just heard this moments ago. Which could mean our "friends" might or might not leave us alone as they've done in the past." _

_Jacob, looking quite annoyed, barked softly. "I am fully aware of that. As you know, I've had many dealings with the Modoc in the past. If there's to be a problem, Horse Breaker will let us know at our usual destination! Don't worry though, we will be okay. As I just said, I've had many dealings with the Modoc! I would worry more about keeping an eye on your wagon." he barked back. Jacob's mouth said wagon, but his eyes sent another message; one that told Matthew the man was not concerned about the wagon itself, but the cargo hidden within it, "let me worry about how to appease the Modoc. That is, if we should run into any and if only they have a problem with us being there."_

_Matthew would have argued with Jacob only he had debts to pay and the cargo they were secretly transporting to some acquaintances in Oregon would pay off the majority of his debt. That being the case, he changed the subject to another matter that was bothering him. "They, the other families, say we're stopping outside of Stockton. They say you are stopping at a friend's ranch where you hope to enlist the aid of his young son. Why? I mean, sure, there's few men on this trip, but there's nothing we can't handle."_

_Jacob shook his head, as his own conscience was trying to tell him the same thing. Only problem was, he was being too cheap. Grown men cost money, and he could get Jarrod's help for free. "I need him, okay! It doesn't matter why, but I do! Now, be quiet about the matter! We should be on my friend's ranch by tonight. Whatever you do, don't go shooting your mouth like you just did now! Let me worry about the talking! Do you understand?" he snarled. _

_Again, Matthew didn't like it, but he didn't feel like he was in a position to argue with the man either. He shook his head and walked away. If he couldn't get Mr. Michael to talk, he had other things that needed to get done before they started on their journey once more._

_Rose, who had been watching from a distance, could tell something was wrong. She didn't like it. Mr. Thomas had cornered her husband more than once since they started the journey and argued with him; something was going on, but what? Cautiously, she walked away from the fire pit where a few of the women were cooking and approached Jacob. She didn't want to set him off. While Jacob had never hit her, he could get highly agitated and start yelling. It made her uncomfortable and to some extent scared of the volatile nature she'd discovered lately in her husband. She also didn't want the extra attention from the families in their company. Laying her hand gently upon his upper arm, she asked, "Is everything okay, Jacob?"_

_Jacob stiffened for a moment and then his shoulders slumped slightly. "Our 'friend' doesn't see any need to ask Tom to allow Jarrod to come with us and help us. He can't see why I need him." He glanced over to where Matthew was working._

_Rose might have voiced the same opinion, only she was chalking it up to the fact that her husband was trying to fill a void left by their son's death. After all, for as long as she could remember, Mark had helped his father guide many wagon trains. The young boy had often talked about growing up and doing the same thing…even if his father no longer guided the trains. "I wouldn't let it get to you. That lad is old enough to carry his weight and be of a great help to us, if his parents let him come with us. Besides, didn't you say you only need his help for a week and a half?" appeased Rose gently. _

"_Yes," Jacob sighed as he answered her, "and, yes, I know I shouldn't let that man bother me." He turned around and walked away doing his best to keep the wall of justification up. If only he had known that years later, when he finally hit his own rock bottom, he would wonder how on earth he had let his values sink so low as to take the advantage of a young boy and the one couple who had been such good friends to him and his wife…Tom had even served by his side in the military at one time. Jacob would also carry the guilt that came with the knowledge that his actions were the beginning of what had to be an extremely bad dream for the Barkleys…not to mention the start of a young man's nightmare. Foresight might have helped avoid it all; however, at that moment all he was doing was praying and hoping no one caught on to what he and Matthew were really up to._

Nick, whose legs were beginning to cramp, stood up, stretched his legs and rolled his shoulders back before leaning against the corral fence once more and looked in the direction of the house. "We didn't find out until it was too late that Jacob was being investigated by the law. Father never would have consented to let Jarrod begin that journey had he known the man had gone from a man to be trusted with your life to a man willing to get free labor wherever he could get it and one that would use other people as a cover for his own gain." Nick closed his eyes as he lifted his clasped hands up and rested them against his forehead. Heath waited patiently for his brother to continue the story.


	6. Chapter 6

**Man of Justice**

**I do not own The Big Valley or any of the original Barkle**_**y**_**s.**

**Chapter Six**

_Nick sat on the couch, his ten year old ears not wanting to believe what his father was saying to his older brother Jarrod. "Well, what do you think son? Do you want to go on the wagon train and help Jacob or not?" He and Victoria, after talking it over for more than a few hours, had decided it would be a good experience for Jarrod… __**if**__ he wanted it that is. _

_Before Jarrod could get a word out edgewise, Nick exploded, something no one had ever seen him really do before. "NO!" the young ten year old jumped up from where he was sitting, not caring how loud his voice was or that he was acting out of anger. "You can't Jarrod, you just can't! It's just like the dream; I know it is! You go with that fellow and everything will change! I just know it!" _

_Jarrod didn't know what to say. Could Nick's dreams actually be a warning of impending danger to himself? Then again, Nick had said he'd come back in the dreams. He wanted to go and help, yet he didn't. He felt as if he was being torn in two directions and didn't know which way to go. He was spared having to deal with his brother as Victoria stood up, walked over to Nick, took a hold of his arm and started leading him towards the stairs. Everyone knew what that meant; Nick's outburst was earning him time in his room._

"_I tell you, nothin' good will come from that trip!" Nick was hollering all the way up the stairs. "Don't go, Jarrod, please!" The young child's voice faded away as his mother opened the door to his bedroom and shut the door, after giving him strict orders to stop yelling and just sit on his bed._

_Tom waited until his wife was again seated in the living room before speaking up again. "It's up to you Jarrod. For as long as I've known Jacob, he's been a good man. If he says he needs your help on the short journey, I have no reason to doubt him. Though, I'll admit, I'll be missing you something awful and be more than overjoyed when you get back, if you decide to go."_

_Jarrod was disturbed by Nick's outburst; it was so unlike his brother. "May I have time to think on it father?" Jarrod looked from his father, to his mother and back to his father. Even at his young age, Jarrod would always need the time to think carefully before deciding anything._

"_Of course, though you should know," Tom answered as he picked up the book he'd been reading earlier, "Jacob, his wife and that small company should be here by supper time. They won't have time to wait for an answer."_

_Jarrod looked at both his parents, feeling the weight of the decision he was going to have to make. "May I be excused? I want to go talk to Nick." It had unsettled him when Nick had exploded like he had; after all, his little brother had never done that before._

_Victoria would have insisted on him letting Nick finish throwing his "little" temper tantrum before approaching him, however, she figured it might actually help. If Jarrod could calm Nick down, it would be worth it. "Go ahead. I hope he will listen to you."_

_Jarrod quickly climbed the stairs to the bedroom and opened the door. Nick was standing by the window looking just as angry as when he left the room. At the sound of the door opening and closing, the child turned around to see Jarrod standing in the room. His anger melted away and he ran into his brother's open arms. "Don't go, Jarrod, please don't go; don't go with that man!" Nick's tears ran freely down his face as he begged his brother to stay._

_Jarrod sighed. How he wished there was something he could say or do to ease his brother's troubled mind. Only problem was, he didn't know what it would be. Finally he spoke softly while holding onto his brother. "That man is father's friend and he needs help. What am I supposed to do? If you needed help, you'd want me to give it. I'd want to give it too."_

_Nick's sobs started to subside, even if he was trying to keep it up. "It won't be a short trip, Jarrod. It won't be, I just know it." He pulled back and looked up into his brother's eyes. _

_The look in Nick's eyes was almost haunting, and it chilled Jarrod to the bone. He almost promised him right then and there he wouldn't be going, but he couldn't do it. His father always helped his friends out, said you didn't turn your back on people you cared about. "I'm sorry, Nick. The man needs help."_

_While Jarrod continued talking to his brother, Victoria had taken Audra and gone outside for fresh air. Tom was right behind her. He started to ask if she was okay, she'd been acting out of sorts for a few days when he saw the wagons off in the distance. "Looks like Jacob and that company he's leading have arrived." He put his arm around his wife's shoulder. Due to Victoria's odd behavior the past few days, which he chalked up to the stress Jacob's request had put on her, he added quietly, "I can tell Jarrod we've changed our minds. We can keep him here."_

_A part of Victoria wanted to do just that, but she couldn't. They'd already told Jarrod the choice was his. She'd had assured her sons early on that once they had made a decision neither she nor Tom would interfere. She couldn't change the rules now. "No, we simply tell Jacob not to ask the boy for an answer until after supper; which I best get started or we won't be eating on time." She turned around and went back inside. _

_Tom waited until the wagons stopped not fifty feet away before he stepped off the porch and walked over to where Jacob was dismounting his horse. Neither men saw the two faces looking at them from the window above. "You go if you have to, Jarrod. I won't try to stop you." Nick looked up at Jarrod with a sad smile on his face. _

_Jarrod said nothing as he gave his brother a hug. While he still doubted Nick's dream meant anything dangerous, Nick's strong belief in them left him with a foreboding sadness. But, he couldn't see how he could say no to Mr. Michael. Like he'd just told Nick, the man was their father's friend._


	7. Chapter Seven

**Man of Justice**

**I do not own The Big Valley or any of the original Barkle**_**y**_**s.**

**Chapter Seven**

_Nick stood on the porch watching Jarrod hand one of the young children traveling with the small wagon train up to her mother. The noise around the yard had been at an all time high, as the adults in the company gathered up the children who had been running around the yard playing while the older children had help load a few more supplies. Tom had ridden into Stockton with Jacob and helped his friend bring the supplies back to the others._

_When he turned his head, Nick could see Duke McCall standing off to the side of the barn looking as if he was rather uneasy. Curious, Nick ran down the steps and over to where their foreman stood. "What's wrong, Mr. McCall?" Nick asked as he climbed up on the nearby fences, so he wouldn't have to tilt his head up to see the man. "You don't look happy."_

_McCall's mouth turned slightly upwards in what looked to be somewhat of a smirk, though he spoke with nothing but a gentle tone to his voice. "You're an observant one, ain't ya?" _

_Nick shrugged his shoulders, "I guess so; what's wrong? You don't like Jarrod helpin' those folks either?" The idea that one of the grownups might feel the same way as him was a bit startling to the young boy. He didn't know why, but he did._

_Duke smiled at the young boy sitting nearby. He'd heard the talk when it came to how Nick had "overreacted" to his brother's going on this trip. "You're supposed to help people when you can, if you can." Duke didn't have a chance to say anything else if he was going to, as Tom walked up._

"_Nick, go into the barn and get Jarrod's tools for him, please. I told him he could take them with him." _

"_Yes, father." Nick jumped off the fence and ran into the barn. It took him a few minutes to gather up all Jarrod's tools, but the moment he had them he headed for the door. Just as he reached up to push the door all the way open, he heard Duke start to argue with his father, who kept his voice low as to avoid having any of their guest overhear what he was saying._

"_Look Tom, I ain't sayin' anythin' but it's what my gut is tellin' me. I've heard Nick, on more than one occasion, tellin' Jarrod nothin' good will come from him leavin' like this. Call me crazy if you want, but I think the lad is right! I know your 'friend' swears up and down he's double checked with the authorities to ensure there is no trouble with the Modoc goin' on. I know he says they assure him it's perfectly safe to travel though that part of California. I know it, but my gut says somethin' ain't right!" Those feelings, and the inability to get through to Tom, were driving McCall up the wall…and it could be heard in his voice. At least, Nick could hear it._

"_First off," Tom's voice was low, but just as firm, "Nick is not quite eleven years old! I can understand him stressing out and having strange dreams, even believing they mean something, but you? You're a grown man! You should know better! That man you're questioning has never been anything but honest with me! What do you want me to do? Lose my temper, go at him with both my fists and 'open him up' that way? For what?"_

"_To get some straight answers! He's hidin' somethin', hitting first and askin' questions just might open him up." Duke barked back._

"_There's isn't anything to find!" Tom shot back. "Only thing that would happen by doing what you're telling me to do is that I'd lose one of the best friends Torie and I have ever had!" the blonde haired rancher turned around and stormed off, but not before he barked, "Tell Nick to hurry up with those tools!"_

_Nick didn't wait for Duke to come into the barn, he pushed the door open and hurried to take the tools he had to Jarrod. He ran so fast, Duke didn't have time to find out whether or not he had over heard any of the conversation between himself and Tom Barkley._

"_Thanks, Nick." Jarrod took the tools, put them inside the back of the wagon he was going to be traveling in, and looked at his brother. He sighed when he saw the troubled look that had, once again, come upon his brother's face. He reached out and gave Nick the biggest bear hug he could, without actually hurting him. "When I get home, we'll go on that cattle drive and have the time of our lives, okay?" _

"_Okay." Nick answered as he stepped away from the wagon, though he said the word more for Jarrod's sake._

"_Come on boy," Jacob walked up to Jarrod. Tom, Victoria and Audra, who was again in her mother's arms, were by the man's side, "Time to get these wagons rolling. See you, Tom, Victoria." He shook their hands and headed for the front of the wagon train._

"_See you later, father, mother." Jarrod gave his father a hug and then Victoria. "See you sis." He gave Audra's hand a squeeze and then, for the last time, gave Nick a hug before climbing up on the wagon he'd be driving. The wagon belonged to one Widow Miller and her three young daughters, all under the age of eight. Her husband had died on the way out west and Jacob had told Tom the family was another reason he'd asked for Jarrod's help. __**"It's bad enough I'm short of help on this trip as it is, I don't want to worry 'bout the Widow and those three youngin's' on top of everythin' else." **_

_As Nick watched the wagon train pull out of the of the yard he found himself believing Duke and wishing he was old enough do as the man had suggested; hit first and ask the questions later._


	8. Refuge for Nick

**Man of Justice**

**I do not own The Big Valley or any of the original Barkle**_**y**_**s.**

**Chapter Eight**

Nick had been pulled away from his storytelling by McCall, but soon returned to find Heath working around the barn. "What's up, you gonna finish the story, or do I need to go find Mother and Jarrod?" Heath asked, though didn't push the issue.

"Might as well," Nick answered as he leaned against the side of the barn, "I have nowhere else to go at the moment."

Heath figured his brother had no desire to be around their unexpected visitors or couldn't concentrate on any other task with the past memories invading his thoughts. More than likely it was both; so, he waited patiently for Nick to begin talking.

_The wind had quit blowing and Jarrod felt the sun was now the wagon train's sole companion. The dark haired Widow Miller, who had been in the back of the wagon taking care of her youngest daughter, who was coming down ill, made her way up to the front and onto the seat of the wagon, next to where Jarrod sat with the reins in his hands. She had been shocked when she'd learned that she was to have help on the journey after all. When the widow had been told of Jacob's request, she was sure the Barkleys would say no. "Thank you for coming along. I really appreciate it. When my husband…" she hesitated then continued, "died, I thought I'd have to finish this trip with little or no help at all."_

_Jarrod felt bad for the young widow. "It's no problem ma'am. I can't understand why Mr. Michael had not been able to find someone to help you. After all, you are far from ugly…" Jarrod suddenly blushed, aware that he had voiced an opinion that was inappropriate for a boy his age to make to a full grown woman. _

_Widow Miller chuckled upon hearing Jarrod say she was far from ugly, and then grew silent. When she did talk, her eyes held a twinge of sadness in them. "There were plenty of men who would have come along to help, but I had no money to pay them, and Mr. Michael didn't either. His budget is tight as it is."_

_Jarrod was shocked and then, because his thoughts had turned to one other widow in the group, one he had helped when they stopped for lunch, he asked, "Widow Jackson didn't have any the money either, did she?" He looked at the woman beside him. She shook her head._

_Jarrod was both confused and upset. Confused because the Widow Miller was just as capable as the Widow Jackson was and Jacob Michael hadn't complained about Mr. Michael had never once said Widow Jackson needed help… and upset because no one had been in a position to spare the amount of time needed to help her without pay. Where was the mercy these women needed? He was shocked to hear the thought __**"You are giving them that mercy; will you continue giving it to others as well" **__enter his head._

**OOOO**

_McCall stood next to the barn watching as Nick threw a rock through the air. It missed a nearby tree by a mile. Due to his fear and concern for his older brother who had only been gone a week the lad was starting to act out. Just that morning, McCall had heard Victoria telling Tom that he had to do something when Nick had an unbelievable outburst over a simple mistake she'd made and, with another mouth on the way to feed, she didn't need to be dealing with his unruly and insolent behavior.. The foreman walked over to where Nick stood still looking angry and defiant._

"_I wonder if you can help me." McCall smiled down at the lad before him. His smile was genuine and his tone pleasant. It threw Nick off as, when he saw their foreman heading his way, he'd figured he was about to receive a similar lecture as he'd gotten from his mother that morning; one very long lecture delivered after she's swatted his backside with a wooden spoon._

"_How?" Nick barked, not caring if he sounded rude or not._

"_I have some time off and want to go fishin' only thing is, I ain't got no one to go with, nor do I know where the good fishin' spots are." He wasn't surprised when Nick's eyes widened. _

_For a moment Nick didn't speak; he couldn't believe Duke McCall wanted him to be the one to go fishing with him. Surely some of the other ranch hands would go with him. "What's the catch? Did mother or father put you up to askin' me? 'Cause if they did, I ain't interested!" He put his fists on his hips and, once again, barked quite loudly. It only made McCall have to bite back a laugh; the boy looked so comical._

"_No, they didn't. I'm asking you on my own." The man answered as he glanced at the house. "Of course, I reckon you need to go ask your parent's permission. Last thing I need them to think is you ran off on them." Again, he had to hold back a laugh as Nick practically tore up the dirt under his feet to get to the house. In a matter of minutes, Nick was back with a huge grin on his face._

_Nick was talking quite fast as he told McCall, "Father said I can go with you anytime I want to, as long as I let mother know when I'm goin' so she doesn't get scared. I'll get my fishin' pole, do you need one?" He looked up at their foreman and asked._

"_If you don't mind, maybe we can just share. Get your pole and then lead the way." McCall told him. Before long, the two were headed away from the barn and in the direction of a small creek that ran not a couple miles from the Barkley home._

_Victoria watched the two leave from the living room window. She voiced her objection to her son going with McCall, due to the man's temperament and the influence he might have on their son. Her words had little effect on her husband. If fact, the only effect it had was to put a look of disbelief on her husband's face. "The man may be loud, obnoxious and hot tempered, Torie," Tom stood his ground as he addressed her concerns, "but I'd never would have made him foreman if he wasn't a good man. The men listen to him without fighting him, unless they are stupid and then they get fed the man's fists. Besides, Nick could do with a friend right now. Jarrod will be home in two weeks and then he and Nick will be back to working together on the ranch."_

_Victoria then turned to the window. She didn't like the uneasy feeling that came over her when she thought of her oldest son; all she wanted was Jarrod home where he belonged._


	9. Chapter Nine

**Man of Justice**

**I do not own The Big Valley or any of the original Barkle**_**y**_**s.**

**Chapter Nine**

Because Nick had no desire to be in the same room as their visitors, he and Heath had entered the Barkley's home through another door besides the front door. Even though Nick could tell him things that Jarrod had told him over the years, Heath found himself glued to the spot he was standing in listening to Victoria and Jarrod taking turns telling a part of the story. Nick too found himself unable to move.

_The children's laughter could be heard ringing though the camp. Jacob and a couple of the men on the wagon train had decided to hunt for some game. That being the case, the rest of the men and Jarrod stayed in camp, to keep an eye out for any sign of trouble and Jarrod to help where he was needed. At that moment, he was working on helping one of the men, a red haired fellow by the name of Paul Hansen, work on fixing the tailgate to his wagon. The man's nine year old son, William, was doing what he could too. After the job was finished Jarrod headed back towards the Miller's wagon._

_ "Jarrod," eight year old Maria Miller ran up to him and held her hand up to him, "it hurts." The child was doing her best not to cry as she spoke._

_ Jarrod took her hand in his and immediately saw what the problem was; the girl had a sliver of wood embedded in her hand. He looked around and saw that the Widow Miller was busy with her two other girls; six year old, Jessica and four year old, Carolina. He looked back at the splinter. He took out his small pocket knife. The sliver wasn't all that deep; he was sure he could get it out quickly. "This will hurt just a little," he told her, "but I'll be as careful as I can. Do you think you can hold real still like?" He hated the idea of inflicting any more pain on the young child than was necessary._

_ "Huh, huh," Jessica closed her eyes as she answered, "Just get it out, please." _

_ Jarrod worked as quickly and as carefully as he could. He was glad to find out he was right; the splinter was indeed easy to get out. "There," he said as he put way his pocket knife, "You can open your eyes. It's out. I'd go show it to your mother though; maybe she'll have something to put on the cut. You know, to keep it from getting infected." He grinned and chuckled just a little as the young girl ran for her mother._

_ He was startled when Leah Hansen, Paul's wife, walked up beside him smiling from ear to ear. "That was awfully kind of you. Not many young men I know have the kind of compassion and gentleness you just showed towards that little girl. Your mother must be pleased with you."_

_ Jarrod was a bit uncomfortable with the compliment. He'd only did what he could for the hurt child. "I hope so, ma'am." He told her as he hurried off to gather the wood he'd promised Mr. Michael he'd have stacked by the time he and the men who had left with him got back. After all, a promise was a promise and he wanted to be the kind of person that kept his._

_**0000**_

_ Tom and Victoria, along with Audra, rode in their buggy. Nick and McCall were riding their horses a little ways ahead of the family, all were going to a friend's wedding. "I think this next week can't go by fast enough. I think my eardrums are going to break and if I hear from Mrs. Simms again, I think I'll scream." Victoria did her best not to sound too ornery, only in between McCall and Nick, the front door of their home was going to come off its hinges; she was sure of that. _

_ Tom managed to keep a grin as wide as Texas off his face. He'd witnessed Nick slam the door the same way he'd seen McCall do out at the bunkhouse, and he'd been cornered by his wife when the schoolteacher, Amanda Simms, had come out two days after Jarrod left to talk to his wife about the fact that Nick had gotten into a fist fight with one of the other boys. Miss Lee freely admitted that she didn't blame their son for being angry with Johnny Crane. After all, the boy had purposely taunted Nick that he knew something that Nick didn't and should. Only it had been a lie, as Johnny knew nothing important. However, that part had not come out until Nick hit him hard…and then began asking the questions. "I'll have a talk with him again, if you want." promised Tom._

_ Victoria made a face and snapped, but not so loud as to wake Audra who had fallen asleep as she leaned against her mother. "Think you can talk to McCall too?" She would have suggested getting a quieter foreman, but not only was Tom right about how the man handled the other ranch hands, Nick had bonded with the foreman so fast it had made their heads spin. To let the man go and get another one before Jarrod got back would be the biggest mistake they could make, and she knew it._

_ Tom couldn't help it, he started laughing. That action earned him a soft slap on his arm, though he didn't let it stop him. "I don't think I can get a grown man to change his ways, besides being loud is not a crime, Torie." He kept his eyes on his foreman and Nick. "Anyway, shouldn't we be glad the man has taken Nick under his wing the way he has? It is keeping Nick busy enough that he's not bothered by those blasted dreams anymore and, thanks to McCall teaching him how to brand a cow, I've had time to get some other business done."_

_ Victoria knew that and she was grateful. It was her ear drums and low tolerance for a child Nick's age to have already been in a couple of fist fights that was getting to her. She was sure it was because her son had picked up on McCall's attitude of acting first and then asking for information. She also had an uncomfortable feeling that, if things didn't "get back to normal" soon, she'd be forever jumping ten feet in the air when Nick entered a room or having to send someone to bail him out of jail when he got older; for getting into brawls for acting before he took time to think. "Maybe, I should increase my supply of cotton balls." She feigned a scowl as she rubbed her left ear._

_ Tom just chuckled again, and snapped the reigns with a loud "Ye hah!" himself. Victoria's eyes widened, but she soon relaxed when the sleeping toddler in her lap never moved a muscle. It seemed everyone except Victoria had gotten used to the loud voices of their loved ones. _


	10. Modoc and a Marshall

**Man of Justice**

**I do not own The Big Valley or any of the original Barkle**_**y**_**s.**

**Chapter Ten**

_The summer sun continued to beat down upon the wagon train. Jarrod had been surprised when Jacob Michael stopped the wagon train hours ahead of schedule. The man had said there was something wrong with one of his, Jacob's, horses. From where he stood Jarrod could see the man kneeling down and checking one of his horse's legs._

_"Is the horse goin' be okay, mama?" Maria Miller looked up at her mother, as they stood by the wagon, watching on.._

_Her mother smiled and nodded, "I think so. He doesn't look bad to me."_

_"He's not bad at all." Jarrod thought only to himself. Something wasn't right, but he didn't know what it was. Before he had a chance to dwell on it, one of the women screamed and Jacob Michael flew to his feet, as the other men grabbed their guns._

_"Hold your fire!" Jacob hurried to end of the wagon train and looked at the scene that had everyone's undying attention and fear. A handful of Modoc Indians sat on their horses about four hundred yards away from the small group. "Wait here!" Jacob barked the order as he headed towards the Indians watching them, "I know just enough of their language to talk to them, if they don't happen to speak English. Meanwhile, get the women and children into the wagons!" No one argued._

_Jarrod watched, still feeling somewhat confused. Certain things just didn't make sense. His keen mind turned one thing after another around in his mind, and some inconsistencies began to surface. Jacob Michael had insisted from the moment he'd stepped foot on the Barkley ranch he meant to get the wagon train moving as early as possible and keep a steady pace, barring any unforeseen event. The first two days they'd done just that. However, just that morning the man might as well danced a slow waltz a few times over, for as fast as he got the wagon train moving he had no sooner made one excuse after another to stop the wagon. It was almost as if, no…Jarrod shook his head. His mind couldn't accept the thought that had just entered his head. Though, he found it repeating itself anyway._

_In spite of the fact that Jacob Michael had assured his father the government contacts had assured him that the Modoc had been forced onto a reservation, it was as if the man knew we'd be meeting up with the Modoc sooner or later; was almost preparing for it. That was the thought that continued to press itself upon Jarrod's mind. But why would the man lie? Jarrod didn't understand it, and it made him nervous._

_When the Indians turned around and rode away, Jacob hurried back to the wagon train. Everyone sighed with relief when he said the leader knew English and he'd been able to assure the man and the men with him that the wagon train was just passing through Modoc country. "Seeing how I was wrong about my horse, we'll have to start moving again. Let's get goin'." Jacob hollered as he headed for his own wagon._

_The men hurried to climb aboard their wagons with their families. All were eager to get away from any threat from the Modoc. Everyone but Jarrod relaxed. How could he? He'd watched Mr. Michael take way too long to check his horse's leg; another thing that added some weight to the theory he'd been waiting for those Indians. How convenient that now he was trying to claim he'd simply been wrong? The man was hiding something, but what? The nervous feeling that had made itself Jarrod's companion refused to leave; in fact, if anything, it grew. _

_**0000**_

_Victoria sat on the porch mending a shirt, Audra sat at her feet playing with a small doll, while Tom stood in the yard talking to McCall and Nick. It was Saturday and Nick had been helping McCall all day. Their talk came to an abrupt halt, when they saw a man with a badge riding their way. As the stranger drew closer, they were all shocked to realize it was a U.S. Marshall that was on their land. _

_While Tom and the others were curious as all get out, Tom waited until the man had stopped his horse not five feet him and dismounted before he spoke. "Somethin' I can do for you, Marshall?" _

_Marshall Lyman Mitchell looked over at Victoria, who had picked up Audra and hurried over to her husband's side, and then at Nick, who stood in between his father and McCall. After what the Marshall had learned, he didn't want to scare the woman or the child. "Hello, I'm Marshall Mitchell, are you Mr. Tom Barkley? He asked. _

_"Yes Marshal, What's this about?" _

_"Is there someplace we can talk?" His eyes and tone of voice, along with a very slight tilt of the head silently added the word 'alone'._

_Victoria would have none of it; however, she didn't want Nick around either. "McCall, didn't you say you were taking Nick with you while you checked some fence lines." She spoke up as she turned her attention to their foreman._

_"I want to stay!" Nick stomped his foot and bellowed. _

_"You will not use that tone of voice with your mother, young man nor will you raise your voice to her!" Tom growled as he glared down at Nick. "You will either help McCall or go to your bedroom!" He wasn't surprised when Nick shut up and followed McCall towards the barn. Once the two were out of sight, Tom turned his attention to the U.S. Marshall in front of him._

_"What is it?" He braced himself for the worst. _

_Marshall Mitchell shrugged his shoulders and replied, "I need to ask you a few questions concerning a friend of yours, one Jacob Michael." He wasn't surprised by the shocked looks that appeared on the faces of the couple before him. _


	11. Going After Jarrod

**Man of Justice**

**I do not own The Big Valley or any of the original Barkle**_**y**_**s.**

**Chapter Eleven**

_The blue sky was dotted everywhere with fluffy white clouds and a few birds could be seen flying over the ranch. To an outsider, it might have seen like the perfect day. As it was, Tom stood on the porch with his bedroll in his hand looking towards the corral where McCall and Nick were sitting on the top of the fence talking. Nick had a temper tantrum when he'd overheard his parents talking after he'd gotten back from riding with McCall …when he learned what his father was planning on doing, as he feared losing him. _

_Normally such a display would have earned him a sound wallop and the rest of the day in his room. But neither Tom nor Victoria had the heart to physically chastise the child. He was visibly distressed and unable to control the very same fear that gripped their own hearts. McCall had offered to go talk to the lad. It was an offer Tom wasn't about to turn down. How could he? The man was at least having success when it came to getting through to Nick. _

_When Victoria walked up beside him, Tom turned and did his best to give her a smile, "Don't chase him away from McCall while I'm gone, please." _

_Victoria gave him a half a smile, her eyes full of hurt and disappointment. How could Tom believe she would do that after Nick had overheard the Marshall telling them that not only did Jacob Michaels have no government contacts, but he was suspected of smuggling guns to the Indians. The Marshall believed that Jacob was using his wagon train, and the good people, as a cover to transport his guns. In fact, the lawman's exact words had been, "We are this close to proving he and a few men have been smuggling guns to the __*****__Klamath, and I'd appreciate your help. You know the man and I'd like you to come with me. I'm going after that wagon train. I want to question that man myself. You should get your son away from him as soon as possible as I wouldn't trust him to go out of his way to keep the any of those people on the train safe including your boy. I, myself, would also fear what might happen should the Modoc find out he's taking guns to a __*****__people they are often times at odds with." The Marshall would lie up in town for a day, if Tom was going to go with him he could contact him through the sheriff's office. Tom and Victoria hadn't needed a long winded discussion, the dangers were clear, but more so for Jarrod, so the decision was quickly made. _

_Tom stood staring at his wife, wishing he had never allowed his son to go. "Torie, I'm… "_

_Victoria put her hand gently to his lips, "Just bring Jarrod back and," her voice grew bitter, "Tell Jacob to never set foot on this ranch again!"_

_Fear for his son and anger towards the man who he considered a former friend now raged through Tom. He had no problem in giving his wife such a promise. "You just take care of yourself." He gave her a soft and gentle kiss, brushing his cheek against her soft cheeks, wet with tears, then glanced down at her still flat abdomen. "You don't want to get too stressed." He then stepped off the porch and headed for his horse which Jim, one of the ranch hands, had already saddled for him. _

_Jim and a couple of other hands were going with him just in case Jacob got skittish and tried anything. He would have preferred to have McCall along, but the foreman was the best one to run the ranch in Tom's absence, and he could keep an eye on Nick._

_While Tom and Victoria were talking, McCall was, at last, getting through to Nick. "Your father's a good man, Nick. Like I keep telling you, he had no way of knowin' the man called Jacob Michael was lying about there being no problems with the Indians. After all, up to now, as far as your father believed, the man would never think of doing such a thing. To blame him, or your mother," he said as he gave the boy who had turned into his shadow, a soft, yet firm glare, "is not right. Think about it. How would you feel if you got blamed for what someone else chose to do?"_

_Nick's shoulders, which he had been holding in a stiff, unyielding manner, sagged downwards. He'd hate it and he knew it. It's just he was terrified for his brother and wanted him back. He wanted him back, but he was afraid to find out how Jarrod had changed. After all, the first part of his dream was coming true, what if the second half did too? _

_When he saw his father heading for his horse, Nick jumped off the fence and ran straight for him. Tom, who saw him coming, naturally stopped and waited for his son to reach him. His heart swelled up inside him as Nick wrapped his arms around his waist and apologized. "I'm sorry, father. It ain't your fault that bad man lied to you. And I know you can't control what happens when someone makes a bad choice. I never shoulda said all those horrible things." He'd gone so far as saying if Jarrod was hurt or missing it was all Tom's fault for not listening to him in the first place._

_Tom knelt down in front of his son and took a hold of his shoulders, after throwing his bedroll on the back of his horse. Looking Nick straight in the eye, Tom smiled the best he could. "Thank you. It takes a lot of courage to apologize sincerely to another person. Now, promise me, no matter what, go apologize that sincerely to your mother. You're the man of the house until I get back, but just the same mind your Mother and McCall. I promise I will bring Jarrod home if at all possible and," Tom paused and then sighed, "if you have to hit something, find something in the barn or around the yard. Don't go hitting the wall again." That was another thing Nick had done. "Can't have you breaking that roping arm, now can we?" Tom smiled as he ruffled his boy's thick hair. _

_"Yes, father." Nick beamed as he ran off to do as he had been asked to. By the time he reached his mother, his father and the other men were riding away from the ranch._

*** "**The Modoc were nomadic hunters and gatherers, surviving on fish, game, seeds, roots, and berries. By weaving together tule reeds they made a variety of their needs including fishing rafts, baskets, moccasins, and summer huts. In the winter they made their homes in earthen dug-out lodges.

Though they spoke virtually the same language as the Klamath tribe and often intermarried with them, they also had a number of conflicts with them."

(That's an exact quote from a site on the internet...only the link won't show for some reason).


	12. Where's My Son?

Man of Justice Chapter Twelve

_"__Whoa!" Jacob called out. It wasn't yet dark, but soon would be. He and the families with him would have to stop for the night. He started to climb down from his wagon, when his wife, Rose put her hand on his shoulder. "What is it?" He looked at her with a confused expression upon his face. _

_Rose wasn't sure her husband would answer the question that had been pestering her ever since the Modoc braves had ridden away. Still, her intuition said she had to ask it anyway. Having bought into her husband's lies, she asked, "You said you were told the Modoc were all on reservations; that they would not be in a position to give us any trouble. If that is the case, what where did those men come from and what do did do they want from us?" She paused and then made a guess before her husband could answer, "They want us off their land don't they?" She just knew they did. __Jacob didn't want to answer; he was nervous as it was. His Modoc friend, whose name basically meant Horse Breaker, and the braves with him had showed up later than expected and then demanded to know if what they'd heard was true; that he was helping the Klamath people. Jacob acted truly shocked and denied it all. He'd had to talk himself blue in the face to get Breaker of Horses to accept the fact that what the Indian had heard was lies and not the gospel truth. _

_Jacob took his wife's hand off his arm. "Obviously, they are not on any reservation. As far as what they want? They don't want us moving as slow as we did today. I told them there was nothing I could do if we continued to have problems, but that we'd move as quickly as we could." That seemed so appease her, and he went on about his nightly business. _

_Matthew watched and listened as Jacob finished talking to his wife and then asked Jarrod to fetch some water from a nearby stream. Afterwards he made his way to the man he'd chosen to work with, once Jarrod had grabbed a pail and was well out of sight. Unhappy with the earlier events of the day and the fact he'd been left out of the talks with the Modoc braves, Matthew confronted Jacob. "Horse Breaker and his men were late getting here to give us their assurance that they'd not be bothering us. What was the hold up, and what did they say?"_

_For a moment Jacob did not speak. He couldn't. His Modoc friend's words were ringing in his ears. "I will take your word that you are not helping the Klamath for now. However, if I find out different, my friends and I will attack your wagon train and take what we want." __After a few moments Matthew cleared his throat, expecting an answer. _

_Jacob surveyed the area for any eavesdroppers before he answered. __"Horse Breaker is growin' uneasy. He's tiring our trips through 'his country'. Best keep your gun loaded tonight and tell the other men to do the same. Who knows what they'll do next; they're as skittish as a new born colt." _

**_ 0000 _**

_Tom pushed his horse hard; he had to. He had to get to Jarrod and get him before anything happened to him. The Marshall and the other men with him rode in the direction Jacob had taken the wagons, it was as if the horse's hooves beating against the hard ground below them seemed to repeating the word 'hurry' over and over again with each thump of his fearful heartbeat. It did not help Tom's mood any. Why had he not taken time to check out things for himself? Why had he merely taken Jacob's word? Why hadn't he listened to McCall? Oh, his head knew the answer, but his heart had been betrayed, and he felt that betrayal deep down in his soul._

_Jim, who rode to the right of Tom, felt horrible for his boss. No one should have to ride this hard in the hope they'd find their son alive and okay. Truth be told, he did more than feel horrible; he felt genuine empathy. Just before starting to work for the Barkleys he'd had to go off in search of his own son, who had strayed from their small homestead. Thankfully, they'd found him okay, but the hours they looked for him were maddening and frightening. "You gonna be okay, boss? Shouldn't we take at least a short rest? These horses are gonna to be too worn out to go anywhere soon." He turned his head slightly and asked. _

_Tom didn't answer at first. He was too busy keeping the pace and rhythm, riding and continually moving his eyes from one side to another, in hopes of catching sight of the wagon train. It kept him focused and calm. "I suppose you're…" he started to answer when the Marshall, to his left, pointed off into distance and cried out, "Look! Over there!" __Tom's heart stopped. Off to the left of the horizon, he could see over turned wagons, some of them were burning and a few adults and children walking around. Because he and the others were too far away to see who the victims of an apparent attack were, he, the Marshall, Jim and the others pushed their horses faster and harder. _

_Jacob was leaning up against his wagon, wounded, staring in disbelief at the sight that lay before his eyes when the riders rode into camp. __The few survivors, which included the Widow Miller and her children, were doing the same. Though, they were either standing or walking around in morbid silence. __The Modoc braves had found them the very next day and attacked the wagon train. How had they found out the truth so fast? Jacob wondered. He had hoped to at least get to the next town, come up with some excuse to put these people with another group and put Jarrod onto a stagecoach a bit sooner than he'd planned on. Now, all he could do was to stare at the destruction that lay in front of his eyes. He was surprised that any of them had survived. __When he heard the riders, Jacob turned his head in their direction. His eyes widened in horror to see Tom Barkley heading straight for him. What was he doing here? His face also paled when he saw the US Marshall with him, along with their obvious posse. How had the law found out what he was doing? __Jacob wanted to hide or run, to get away; but, all he could do was sit where he was, immobile and speechless, as Tom Barkley jumped off his horse and made his way to him. _

_Kneeling down beside Jacob, Tom put his face within inches of Jacob's. His eyes shot cannonballs at the man he would no longer call a friend and his voice threw ice out with each word he spoke. His voice carried through the air as he bellowed, "Where's my son!" __Jacob looked into the hard glare in Tom Barkley's eyes. Out of the want to save a few measly dollars, he'd brought an innocent young boy into an area he never should have been in. And now? Jacob tried to speak but failed, unable to get the words to come out of his mouth. It was the Widow Miller who spoke up, answering Tom's question. When she spoke her words sent chills down Tom's back. "The Modoc took him."_

** 0000 ****  
><strong>

"The Modoc were nomadic hunters and gatherers, surviving on fish, game, seeds, roots, and berries. By weaving together tule reeds they made a variety of their needs including fishing rafts, baskets, moccasins, and summer huts. In the winter they made their homes in earthen dug-out lodges.  
>Though they spoke virtually the same language as the Klamath tribe and often intermarried with them, <strong>they also had a number of conflicts with them<strong>." (That is an exact quote from a website I found. I had the link saved only, somehow, I lost it. and the last words were not bolded.)

**000**

The Modoc are a Native American people who originally lived in the area which is now northeastern California and central Southern Oregon. They are currently divided between Oregon and Oklahoma. The latter are a federally recognized tribe, the Modoc Tribe of Oklahoma. The Oregon Modoc are enrolled in the federally recognized Klamath Tribes.[1] Modoc Plateau, Modoc National Forest, Modoc County, California; Modoc, Indiana; and numerous other places are named after this group of people.


	13. I Knew It!

**Man of Justice**

**I do not own The Big Valley or any of the original Barkle**_**y**_**s.**

**Chapter Thirteen**

_The moon sent down its light. The millions of tiny diamond like stars wrapped itself around a very frightened young lad. Jarrod would have tried to run away as he was not tied up, but two things stopped him. One, there were eight Modoc men surrounding him. Actually, six were lying down asleep, but two were awake. One was keeping an eye on him; the other kept an eye out for anyone who might follow them. The second was simple enough too; he had no clue to where they were or how to bet back to where he'd been. His captors had pushed their horses all day and gone across flat land, up and down hills and in every direction possible…and then some._

_ Now, Jarrod lay on top of a hill, under a blanket with only his arm as a pillow. His mind raced as fast as any train he'd ever seen body of water run down a river. He had gone out gathering wood for the Widow Miller when he heard the war cries of the Modoc men. He'd dropped the wood and ran, yelling as to warn the rest of the wagon train. Seeing Jarrod running, and hearing his warning, the men had grabbed their guns, the women and children had hid in the wagons, but Jarrod had never made it back to the camp. One minute he was running towards the Miller's wagon, and the next a Modoc brave had appeared from behind, leaned down from his horse, grabbed Jarrod around his waist and hauled him up on his horse. Two other Modoc braves, one on each side, suddenly arrived as they rode away from the wagon train, while the other Modoc did what they wanted to. _

_ Since it had been just prior to breakfast when Jarrod had found himself taken by the Modoc men, he'd thought they'd stop and rest around noon, but no, the small group had stopped only long enough to take care of any personal business and to get dried meat out of the pouches they carried with them. They handed Jarrod some after they mounted their horses and started on their journey again. _

_ "You should have fought them!" Jarrod chastised himself continually over the miles they must have covered in the past two days. He had to remind himself there were three of them and the one holding him had a pretty strong grip around his waist so a fight would have been useless. "What do you want from me?" he asked silently to himself as his mind turned back to Nick and his dreams. "How was I supposed to know the dreams were an actual warning?" He looked up at the sky and wondered if he'd ever see his father, mother, brother or sister again. He told himself he was too old but Jarrod found tears escaping and falling down the side of his cheeks. Jarrod had the Modoc men who took him with him… and he was all alone._

**0000**

Heath would have preferred to continue to stay where he was standing listening to Jarrod and Victoria tell the story, as would Nick, only McCall had slipped in the same entrance way they had used to enter the house and found them. They were needed outside. "You know, Heath," Nick looked at Heath as they finished fixing the mess one of the former ranch hands had made, "You can always go back in there," He nodded towards the house, "I don't have to tell you the story; after all it's second hand information."

Heath threw Nick a lopsided grin and shook his head, "Naw, you can pick the story back up. You might be a lot of things," Heath told him, "but you've got a heart of gold. I trust you to repeat only what you either know to be fact or to repeat what Jarrod's told you over the years without embellishing any of it. You're more than trustworthy, even with your interestin' habits." He gave Nick a wink and chuckled; his way of telling him he didn't think McCall's influence on him had been all that bad of a thing. Nick grinned and did as Heath had suggested, pick up the story from where they'd had to walk away from it.

_Victoria stood in the front yard with the telegram that McCall had brought from town in her hands. The tears she'd cried when she'd read it had watered the ground below her feet. Their foreman had said nothing; what could he say. Straightening her shoulders, she looked at McCall. "Does Nick know?" She only asked because Nick, needing his mind taken off the fact that his father had gone after Jarrod, had gone into town with their foreman._

_ "No, Mrs. Barkly," McCall shifted his weight as he put a hand on his hip and the other one on the back of his neck, "After all, Mr. Kenyon gave it to me while the boy was talkin' with one of his friends. I thought you should see it first." Well, that and he didn't think it right that Tom's wife hear the news from what he was sure would be a hysterical ten year old boy._

_ Victoria looked at the telegram once more. WAGON TRAIN ATTACKED. FEW SURVIVORS. MODOC HAVE JARROD. JIM AND I SEARCHING. SENDING OTHER MEN HOME. TOM. _

_ When she heard Nick's footsteps running towards them, Victoria slid the telegram into her skirt pocket. She knew her son needed to be told about his brother. The moment Nick was by her side, Victoria told McCall he could go back to work while she and Nick went inside._

_ The moment Victoria spoke to their foreman, Nick looked up at his mother. "Can't I just keep helping, McCall?" _

_ Victoria gave her son 'the eye', since when did her children refer to adults merely by their last name. As if he could read her mind, Nick quickly defended himself and pointed to McCall. "He said to just call him McCall."_

_ McCall shrugged his shoulders, "I've had folks callin' me McCall for as long as I can remember."_

_ Victoria nodded, "All right, McCall it is, but no, Nick, you come in the house with me. Though," she said as she threw a glance McCall's way, "I will assume you will be nearby." _

_ McCall smiled as he turned away, "Yes, Mrs. Barkley. I will be around." "I'll always be around for that boy." That last thought was spoken only to himself._

_ Victoria turned around and, with Nick following, went back inside the house. The moment his mother sat down and looked at him, Nick knew something was wrong. His mother never had a look in her eyes that yelled trouble. Afraid he'd done something wrong, Nick began going over the day's events…to see what it might be. Knowing full well what her son might be thinking, Victoria patted the seat beside her. "You have done nothing wrong, Nicolas, but I need to talk to you."_

_ Nick stiffened as he heard his mother call him Nicolas; she never did that unless there was trouble, and if he hadn't done anything. If he hadn't done anything…his eyes began to widen as he thought on his father and Jarrod. "It's father and Jarrod! Isn't it? Something's wrong!" He stood up and bellowed without thinking._

_ Victoria, whose nerves were already on edge, did her best not to yell. "Nicolas Jonathon Barkley, you will not raise your voice in this house or to me!"_

_ "Yes, mother." Nick knew better than to say anything else._

_ Victoria took a deep breath as she repeated her request and waited for Nick to oblige. Once he was seated, she continued. _

_ "Your brother is missing." she didn't dare tell Nick that the Modoc had taken Jarrod quite yet. She hoped it would not be necessary. "Jim and your father are looking for him." She went on to explain it might be awhile before the two men came back._

_ Nick jumped to his feet. Hearing the news made him forget what his mother had just scolded him about. He bellowed again, "I knew this would happen! I just knew it!" Before she could stop him, Nick ran to the front door, opened it up and slammed it shut on his way out._


	14. Chapter 14

**Man of Justice**

**I do not own The Big Valley or any of the original Barkle**_**y**_**s.**

**Chapter Fourteen**

_Jarrod opened his eyes as the sun hit his face. It took a moment to remember where he was and why. He quickly shut his eyes, as if it would help the reality of his situation go away. Unfortunely, he didn't get to lie and pretend everything would be all right once he opened his eyes for good. Before he knew it one of the Modoc men was grabbing his shoulder, shaking it and talking rather rough. Since the brave spoke in the tongue of the Modoc people, Jarrod could only assume the man wanted him to wake up and get up. Reluctantly, he did just that._

_The man who had awakened him pointed to the blanket, said something and then pointed to the horse. Jarrod could only guess the man talking expected him to pick up the blanket and get on the horse. Once again, he found himself on the same horse as he'd ridden the day before. When one of the other men handed him a piece of dry meat, Jarrod wanted to throw him back at him. He didn't though. How could he? His stomach was growling as it was. He figured it was all he'd be given until they stopped again and he needed to keep his strength up._

_As the scenery changed from flat land, to hills then to mountains, Jarrod again thought on Nick begging for someone to believe that his dreams meant something. He felt horrible for not listening, but told himself over and over to stop thinking about it. There was nothing he could do about his situation at the time. Though, he held onto the hope that someone, if not his father, was tracking the men who had taken him away from the wagon train._

_When the men he was with stopped, but remained seated in their saddles, Jarrod looked around. It took him a moment, but he soon saw why the men had stopped. Not four hundred yards off to their left sat two more Indians. However, while the Modoc men were dressed from head to foot in buckskin, the two Indians Jarrod saw were in a *loin cloth around their waist, one that was secured in place by a belt; they also wore moccasins. He wondered what was going on. _

_Jarrod didn't have to wonder long. Before he knew it, Jarrod found Horse Breaker leading him towards the two waiting Indians while the other Modoc men hung back. Jarrod's heart began to race as, the closer they got to the other Indians. What was going to happen?_

_Once Horse Breaker, who was leading him stopped in front of the two waiting Indians, the three men started talking. Had Jarrod known the words being spoken, he would have found out that the Modoc owed the Indian closest to Jarrod a great personal debt. The man's late son had given his life to save him. Now, Horse Breaker handed the reins to Jarrod's horse over to the Shoshone man in front of him._

_Jarrod watched as Horse Breaker and his men left, helpless to do anything. The Modoc had actually secured his hands behind his back before starting on their journey that morning. His attention then went to the Shoshones in front of him. The one holding the reins to his horse was looking him over. He shocked Jarrod when a sad look came into his eyes and he made his way to Jarrod's side._

_Jarrod felt the ropes on his wrist being loosened and removed. The moment they were free, Jarrod started rubbing his wrists. Though the man shocked him when he handed him the reins and said, __*******__ "Kim." Kim? Jarrod was puzzled until the man started to leave, turned and waved at him and sad 'Kim' again. _

_"He wants me to follow him," Jarrod spoke low as he sighed, "What choice do I have? It's not like I know the way home." Only when he did as he was directed did the two Indians start their own horses up the path they were on._

_**0000**_

_Tom knelt on the ground looking at the hoof prints that had been left behind the raiding Modoc. Jim sat on his horse saying nothing. The two men had been tracking the Modoc who attacked the train for days now, eating jerky and a few rabbits they'd been able to kill. They'd found the Indians camp and now had come to the spot where the there were signs that the group had split up, only to have signs show up that said they were together again. He assumed they had simply been looking for food._

_`When he saw a white man riding their way, Tom stood up and waited for him to approach; Jim too continued to sit on his horse and say nothing. They hoped, maybe, the stranger would have some piece of helpful information. After all, he was coming from the direction the tracks that Tom and Jim had been following. Maybe, he had seen Jarrod. _

_"Hello, friend," Jonathon Pierce, a local trapper and hunter, stopped his horse in front of Tom and Jim, "how are you this fine morning?" The man was all smiles and full of life. Tom wished he could feel the same way._

_"I'd be better if I could find my son. I don't supposed you've see a white boy, almost fourteen, traveling with some Modoc have you?" He kept his eyes on the man's face. He wasn't surprised when the man stiffened and the smiles left his mouth and eyes. It was a reaction he himself might have had had he been asked the same question._

_"I passed some Modoc last night, but they had no boy with them; Modoc or white." Mr. Pierce paused and then asked, "How long have you been looking for your boy?"_

_Tom held onto the horn of his saddle as he felt his stomach churn. "Two weeks, the Modoc took him after attacking the wagon train he was on. We've," Tom nodded towards Jim and added, "been tracking them ever since."_

_Jonathon didn't like it. He'd been in Modoc country for a month now and he hadn't seen any white boy with them. "Well, keep in the direction you're going and you'll wind up in the Mt. Shasta area. There are Modoc in that area; you might find your son there."_

_"Thanks." Tom remounted his horse following Jim, who was again headed in the direction they'd been going before they'd stopped to look at the tracks. Unfortunely, because they did this, they missed Jarrod's wallet, the one Tom had given him for Christmas. It lay not ten feet down the path where the other set of tracks lay. _

**0000**

_Nick was sitting on the top of the corral fence when McCall walked up. He didn't have to look to know his friend was not happy with him. "Mother must have talked to him." Nick thought as he waited for McCall to speak. However, he was surprised when the man jumped the fence instead, walked over to the other side and picked up some small, thin boards and began hitting them against the fence, breaking them in the process; the man was also letting out a string of cuss words and turning the sky blue. Only when he was through did McCall turn and look at Nick, who had crossed the corral and sat on the other side waiting for the temper tantrum to cease._

_McCall, his breathing a bit heavy but getting back to normal, held out a board to Nick and shocked him. "You're turn."_

_"What?" Nick was confused. "You WANT me to act like that?" _

_McCall gave him a serious look, one that got Nick's attention and held it. "I don't want either one of us to act like that, but if it's a choice between that and what yer doing; raising your voice to your mother…" he paused as he thought on the day Tom came back, "Or your father, then yes. Punch, hit and break anything, say anything, but don't ever raise your voice to either one of your parents ever again. Don't you think they're hurtin' over this? Haven't you taken time to listen, I mean, really look at your mother and listen? That mother of yours is a real lady, a duchess if you wish; she doesn't need to be worryin' 'bout Jarrod and tryin' to handle your outbursts at the same time." He stopped to take a breath and to give Nick time to think. "Don't you think your parents ain't already blamin' themselves and shedding tears? Now here!" He handed Nick the thin board in his hands._

_Nick looked at the board then at McCall and over to the house. He remembered the look on his mother's face, how it changed from a serious look to one that was filled with heartache and then how he'd simply jumped up and had his fit. Within seconds, he was breaking the board and doing just as McCall had shown him._

TBC

Author notes:

*****1. **Shoshone clothing changed with the seasons, ranging from a simple a Breechcloth held on by a belt fastened around the waist for the men and aprons for the women to rabbit fur pants and jackets, and larger animal hides used as capes and coverings.**

The Western Shoshone tribes lived in Oregon and western Idaho, and ranged from central Idaho, northwestern Utah, central Nevada**. Some were also located in California.**

*"From early accounts it is clear that the only **constant** allies of the Snakes were the _Datci'ba_, a subdivision of the Flathead, who joined their fishing-parties and accompanied them on their hunting excursions into the Plains. The Bannock, though never hostile, do not seem to have afforded their contenders any protection against their eastern foes in the early days.

From my research on the internet (see above note), I will assume that relationship between the Modoc and the Shoshone was an off and off again relationship, I have them being peaceful enough with each other at this time.

*** VOCABULARY of THE SHOSHONE LANGUAGE/George W. Hill/ Printed at the Desert News Steam Printing Establishment 1877. Reprinted in 1986 with a cover By Little Red Hen Inc./Pocatello, Idaho. I will be using this book, one I checked out from the college library, to get any Shoshone words I use in the story.

Kim= COME in English.


	15. Jarrod's New Home

**Man of Justice**

**I do not own The Big Valley or any of the original Barkle**_**y**_**s.**

**Chapter Fifteen**

_Jarrod stirred once more and opened his eyes. His eyes focused on the roof above his head and he looked around...only later would he learn the structure he was in was called a_ wigwam_. Again, it all came back to him and he sat up. He looked down at his bare chest and reached out for his shirt. Shock waves ran through him as he realized his shirt was gone. Panic filled him as his eyes searched for his shirt. Only when the man who had brought him into the village walked into the domed shaped structure was his attention drawn to something besides the missing piece of cloth._

_ Straight Arrow sighed internally, though his face was as readable as a stone wall. He knew Horse Breaker only meant to honor his dead son and, normally, to give him a son to replace the one he'd lost would be considered a great gift. But a white boy? Would he be able to adjust to life in the Shoshone village? What about his family? If only he knew the white man's language, if only the people in his village knew it, someone could have talked to this young boy and find out where he was from and if there was a chance his own father would be looking for him. Knowing there was no one who could communicate with the lad and knowing the Modoc would kill them both if he, Straight Arrow, refused Horse Breaker's gift, the man walked over to his new son holding what looked like to be a loin cloth and belt; a pair of moccasins were in his other hand. _

_ Without thinking, Jarrod pulled the blanket higher and pulled back. Straight Arrow wanted to take the young man in his arms and assure him he meant him no harm, but that was something that time would have to teach him. He dropped the items next to Jarrod, pointed to himself and then to Jarrod before he turned and walked out of the wigwam. Jarrod got the picture. While he still wore his pants he was to get rid of them… as the man wanted him to dress the way he was._

_ Straight Arrow who was well known and respected in his village as a kind, patience, gentle, yet strong and firm, spiritual man, wasn't surprised when a good half hour passed before Jarrod walked out of the hut looking very much out of sorts. "Kim." Straight Arrow motioned for Jarrod to follow him. Soon the two were walking though the village. Jarrod could feel the eyes of everyone upon him. There were young boys who looked to be Nick's age working with older boys and women working around open fire pits. Before Jarrod knew it he was standing in front of another home that looked to be a bit larger than the others he'd seen. _

_ Jarrod sucked in his breath as a very important looking Indian emerged from the structure before him. The gentleman had to be close to six feet tall. If Jarrod had known the language, once the man started talking, he would have known the man was the medicine man. He would have also known the chief was sick, hence the reason the trip to the medicine man first. He would have also known the man was asking Straight Arrow who he, Jarrod, was._

_ *"Neah-en-doo-ah." Straight Arrow answered as he glanced at Jarrod, simply stating that the boy was his son. _

_ Lightfoot didn't know what he thought of this new development. Their people knew how Straight Arrow had not only grieved the day their enemies had killed his wife, but how his grief had only been made worse by the death of his only son, Fists of Iron. *"Ka-nung-en." Lightfoot looked at Straight Arrow with a confused look upon his face telling him he did not understand and waited for an answer, one that he could comprehend._

_ Straight Arrow went on to explain that "the boy before them" had been taken during a Modoc raid and that, rather than kill him; Horse Breaker had brought the white child to him as a gift, to replace his lost son. He laid his hand upon Jarrod's shoulder which made Jarrod cringe inwardly, but out of fear for his life kept his mouth shut and remained standing stiffly._

_ When the two men finished talking, Straight Arrow led the boy he had now accepted as his new son down to the river. Jarrod didn't know what to think as the man pointed to the river and said, *"Pah-gotch-o." Was he calling the river Pah-gotch-o? The man repeated the word only this time he pointed down the river to where a young man could be seen in the river washing himself. He then repeated the word, pointing to the water and to Jarrod. While Jarrod didn't understand the Shoshone's language, he got the picture. He looked around. The men and women were going about their business as if nothing unusual was happening. Jarrod gulped and prepared to bath._

At this point in the story, Nick stopped and doubled up his fists as he hissed. "Two weeks shy of his fourteenth birthday and he had to walk around with nothing but a loin cloth and moccasins **and** bath in a river where the whole blasted village could see him. Land sakes, where was his privacy! Oh don't get me wrong, Jarrod and I had done plenty of swimming buck naked with the other boys. And father taught us to swim that way too, but Jarrod would have died of pure embarrassment of having to bath in front of women and girls. Plus he was always the neat one! He would never come out of his room in his long johns, let alone walk around half naked, like that!" He stepped away from the barn, stooped over, picked up a rock and threw it as hard as he could. Jarrod's first wardrobe… or lack of it… along with his first bath experience was something Nick had not known about until he, Nick, was almost twenty-three.

While Heath was reeling from being told that Jarrod had gone from being taken by the Modoc to being given to the Shoshone, along with his "new attire", he was not surprised to learn that Jarrod had to bath in public while living with the Shoshone. He knew it didn't surprise Nick either. He knew it was just the thought that a boy from one culture had had to go through the shock of adjusting to another one that was upsetting this brother. Thinking his brother might need a break from talking, Heath spoke up. "I can wait for the rest of the story if you want to do something else."

Nick turned around and looked at Heath. He could see the curiosity burning in his eyes. "No." he straightened his shoulders as he saw Audra exit the house and head for the stable. She looked rather upset. "I suspect she's heard a part of the story too, I might as well tell you everything now and get it over with.

**00000**

_* Shoshone words used in this chapter. For book reference see Chapter Fourteen._

_Kim=Come_

_Pah-gotch-o =Wash_

_Neah-en-doo-ah=My son_

_Ka-nung-en= I don't understand._


	16. Chapter 16

**Man of Justice**

**Chapter Sixteen**

_Jarrod again stood in the wigwam__ he'd awakened in. He knew the man who he'd been given too expected him to get outside and work alongside the other boys, but today he was dragging his feet. He hated going outside in only the loincloth and moccasins. He'd have looked for his other clothes, but where on earth could one hide them in such a structure as this? He'd slowly accepted the fact that the items had been thrown away or used for something else._

_ As he looked out the entrancerway, Jarrod could see the men, women and children moving around. He sighed; in the two weeks he'd been living and working in the village he'd seen a few white traders off in the distance, but every time he'd seen them Jarrod had found himself being hurried off in the opposite direction. Since he didn't understand the words being spoken to him, he didn't understand that Straight Arrow only feared for the boy's life. After all, the Shoshone brave had seen how the white man treated not only his people but the whites who had lived among the Shoshone and other tribes. That fact, along with not knowing the travelers had not seen him, made it so Jarrod was left to confusion, anger, pain, homesickness and a feeling of abandonment._

_ "Nick was right." Jarrod sighed as he stepped out his new home, "I should have listened. We all should have listened. Now I'm stuck in a Shoshone Village miles away from home." Shoshone; it was a word that had only been a name in a book until he'd heard one of the travelers say the word just before Straight Arrow had hurried him off in the other direction._

_ "Mad-zat-tim-ma!" Jarrod jumped when he heard Straight Arrow bark firmly, though his tone held no harshness in it. He looked at the man and to where he was pointing. The front "door" was open. "Mad-zat-tim-ma!" the man spoke again as he looked from Jarrod to the opened "door". The "door" on his Shoshone Father's home was simply a flap of cloth that could be pulled to one side…in order to cover the entrance way. _

_ In his state of mind, Jarrod had left it opened. "Guess he wants the flap down." He mumbled, and then turned around and laid the cloth over opening. When he had that done, Straight Arrow led him to a broken fishing net and pointed to it speaking other words that Jarrod wished he understood. He took a guess at what the man wanted and started working on fixing the item. The guess must have been a good one as he was left to work on it alone._

_ When he heard footsteps approaching, Jarrod looked up. It was one of a young man by the name of Raging River's Friend. The lad had been polite to Jarrod from the beginning, unlike some of the other boys who had pointed and called out various words while laughing and mocking him. In fact, the young man was taking Jarrod under his wing and doing what he could to help him learn the Shoshone language. The two were becoming fast friends._

_ "Hob-by-we-he." Jarrod's friend pointed to the small pocket knife Jarrod had with him, it was one thing that had not disappeared when his clothes had. His friend had said the word more than once and then looked at Jarrod._

_ Jarrod had remained silent when the boy talked before, only now he was getting the idea. Hob-by-we-he must be the Shoshone word for pocket knife. "Hob-by-we-he." Jarrod tried to say the word, but it came out sounding funny. It didn't matter though, his new friend simply repeated the word, and then repeated it as Jarrod tried to say it. Jarrod didn't know if it was because he was tired of not being able to understand what was being said around him or what, all he knew was he found himself wanting, really wanting, to learn the language. That being the case, while Jarrod worked his friend would point to various things, say the name, and then Jarrod would repeat it._

_ By the time he'd finished with the net, Jarrod's friend had had to leave. Again, Jarrod was left alone. Not knowing exactly what he was supposed to do with the net, Jarrod picked it up and headed for the only person he could think of who could help him, Straight Arrow. He might not know the man by that name yet, but he still knew his face._

_ Jarrod was more than relieved when he saw Straight Arrow heading for him as Jarrod was, for the hundredth time, feeling more than uneasy at the young Indian maidens who would look his way point and whisper. He wasn't some foreign object to be stared at and studied. None of it might have been that bad if only he could get on a horse and ride around, but that was something he wasn't being given. In his state of mind, Jarrod assumed it was because he was being held captive and the Shoshone did not want him to escape. The truth was far from that; Straight Arrow simply feared the boy would get lost and be found by one of their enemies. If that happened, he feared for the boy's life and, worse yet, what would be done to him before the enemy killed him. Unfortunately, it would be months before Jarrod understood this, so Jarrod remained guarded and self conscious around many in the village._

_ When Straight Arrow reached his son, he motioned for the boy to follow him, and Jarrod obeyed. He wasn't surprised when they wound back up in the area he'd been fixing the net in. Once Straight Arrow showed him where to put the net, he handed Jarrod another net and had him go to work on it. The rest of the day Jarrod worked on nets, doing his best to keep his mind off the people in the village who continued to look at him as if he was participating in some carnival freak side show. Any tears that wanted to come were saved until later, until he lay under his blanket late at night, wondering just how long he was going to be away from his family._

_**0000**_

_Mad-zat-tim-ma=Shut the door_

_Hob-by-we-he = Pocket Knife _


	17. Tom Turns Back and Third Place

**Man of Justice**

**Chapter Seventeen**

_By the time Tom and Jim rode into Yreja, three months had passed. They'd stopped in more towns, been through more villages and crossed more than one river than they ever thought possible in so short of time. Finding their way to the local telegraph office, Tom sent Victoria a wire telling her that they were still looking for Jarrod, and then they headed to the local saloon for a drink._

_ "Tom," Jim looked around the mostly bare room and the bartender who seemed overly interested in cleaning the bar and lowered his voice, "Please, when I say this understand I do feel for you. I don't know what I'd have done if we couldn't find my boy." He made sure he was looking Tom in the eye as he wanted him to know how serious he was. "Only think about Victoria and your other children. They need you!"_

_ Tom clenched his drink in his hard, but not so hard as to break the glass. Ninety days of searching and asking with no clues whatsoever. If only he had something to hold onto, something that said he wasn't wasting his time. How he wanted to keep looking, only Jim was right. He had his wife and other children to think about. He glanced out a nearby window and thought on his family and what they must be going through as he searched. His heart felt heavy, like it was ready to break. "Oh Victoria," he thought as he took another shot of his whiskey, "Please, forgive me, I've failed to find our son." Taking another drink, he added, "Please, forgive me, Jarrod. Wherever you are, please understand. I want to keep looking; only I can't. I just can't." Outwardly, his shoulders slumped as he nodded in agreement. "I'll send another telegram in the morning. I'll tell Victoria we're coming home…Alone."_

_ Jim said nothing as he finished his drink. What was he supposed to say? He knew the pain and fear associated with looking for a child, but he couldn't even come close to comprehending the turmoil one went through when they'd lost a child. He waited until Tom stood up before he did the same. There was nothing more he could do for his friend, but to be there for him and his family._

_**0000**_

_Jarrod ran as fast as he could through the open clearing where the Shoshone were holding various games and races. In the three months he'd been in the village, he'd made the adjustment to living with his new father and was finally learning the language well enough to carry on very small conversation. Unfortunely, he was still not able to talk Shoshone well enough to carry it long enough to talk about his white family._

_ The shouts of encouragement, from different people to different racers, rang through the air. Well, to those who had *earned a name he could. The other runners, like him, were still receiving encouragement though. Jarrod pushed himself hard for one main reason. His Shoshone father had never mistreated him and was doing his best to teach the things he needed to know to live among this people. Jarrod still remembered Straight Arrow's words to him just before the race. "Git-ta-nuke. Too-nuts", Jarrod had learned enough to know that his "father" had told him to "Run fast and do your best." Jarrod didn't want to shame him anymore than he'd ever wanted to shame Tom Barkley. By the time he reached the end of the clearing, two other runners had beaten him, but not by much. The rest of the runners were at least a minute or more behind them._

_ Straight Arrow was waiting with a huge smile upon his face as Jarrod hurried over to him. "You did well today, son. How do you feel?" Straight Arrow praised in his native tongue. _

_ Jarrod smiled from ear to ear. It felt good to know he had succeeded in pleasing Straight Arrow. "Jant, ne-ah-quack." Jarrod replied; saying he was good, but he was very tired._

"_Coming in third is not bad at all." Straight Arrow and Jarrod walked to the edge of the clearing, through the trees and down a slight incline to a small creek that ran nearby. _

_ Because the games and races had been going on all day, Jarrod felt the need to just sit and relax against the bank. Taking off his moccasins, which no longer felt odd on his feet, he sat down and stuck his feet in the creek. Straight Arrow looked upon "his son" with mixed feelings. In the short three months the boy had been brought to him, he had grown to love him as he had his own son. Only problem was, a voice inside him kept saying 'He is not yours. He was taken by force. What about his white family? Don't you think they searched for him? Don't you think they mourn as you once mourned? _

_ "Oh Great Spirit," Straight Arrow looked up toward the sky, "I have to care for him right now. Help me do right by him while he is mine. How can I give him back to a family I do not know, a family he cannot tell me about as he is still learning our language?" He finished the prayer, sat down…after taking off his own moccasins, and put his own feet in the river. Only when their started growing cold and the sun started setting did Jarrod and Straight Arrow make their way back to their home. _

_**0000**_

*** The below comment was on an internet site I found concerning the Shoshone. **

"An Indian child is never given a name until something in life occurs to particularly designate it. It may receive a name the first day of its life or it might not until ten or fifteen years of age. While taking the census of the Lemhis in 1900, I found many that were fifteen years of age with no name" (Rees: ISU Archives).


	18. Chapter 18

**Man of Justice**

**I do not own The Big Valley or any of the original Barkle**_**y**_**s.**

**Chapter Eighteen**

_It was almost noon before, Tom and Jim rode onto the ranch and up to the house. Victoria was sitting on the porch talking to McCall, who was standing on the ground next to the porch. Audra was playing at her mother's feet while Nick was "roping" his cow once more. Though, he'd been quick to point out it was not as much fun as the real round up which McCall had taken him on; the one he'd wound up being in charge of in Tom's absence and, sadly, Jarrod's._

_ The moment she saw her husband ride up, Victoria was on her feet. Any tears she'd cried for her lost son had long since dried up, though her heart was still broken into a million pieces._

_ "Hello, Torie, I'm sorry… I failed you." Tom's eyes showed the effect of his long, unfruitful search. The exhaustion could be heard not only in his voice, but in his soul as his shoulders drooped as if he was carrying a heavy load. _

_ Victoria moved as quickly as she could down the steps and slid into her husband's open arms. Both hung onto each other as if they're very lives depended on it._

_ "It wasn't you that failed dear, dear." Victoria talked low and soft as she pulled away just enough to look up at her husband, "the man who failed is being sent to prison for eighteen years." She'd made sure she'd attended Jacob Michael's trial and made sure the judge heard her piece._

_ "Little consolation for the loss of our son, man deserves hanging!" Tom would have gone and had it out with the man, but murder was against the law, and that would have destroyed all their lives. He had his family to think of._

_ Their attention was taken off each other as Nick came barreling at his father. Tom was not surprised when the young child started hitting his leg with his fists and screaming. "You left Jarrod out there! How could you!"_

_ Tom grabbed his son's arms and held him close while he continued his rampage, even accusing Tom and Victoria of 'only having that baby to replace Jarrod'. Though she knew Nick was only acting out of stress and his own grief, Victoria turned and fled into the house where she disappeared into her room and started crying once more. "How could you, Jacob!" she cried out in fury, "How could you! First you rob me of my oldest and now, my second is left with scars I fear will take years to heal!"_

_ While Victoria lay on her bed crying once more, Tom and McCall were finally getting Nick to calm down. "Nick, look at me!" Tom knelt down and made the request a second time only with his voice firmer than ever. He hated doing that under these circumstances, but Nick had gone from a patient and care free boy to one with a temper too hot for his own good. He had to make sure his son knew he meant business. Slowly, Nick did as he was told and was shocked to see the few tears that had managed to escape down his father's cheek._

_ "First off, I did my best to find your brother and I will continue to pray and hope for the day that he is guided home. Second off, you know full well your mother was expecting before your brother left, his disappearance has nothing to do with this baby. I do not ever want to hear you such a thing again, especially to your mother, ever! Treating her that way should never even be an option! Do you understand?" Tom did not loosen his grip on his son. He had to succeed, somehow, in getting the child to at least accept, if not understand, such behavior towards Victoria was very much unacceptable._

_ Nick eyes turned downwards, after shooting McCall a glance and seeing the disapproving look upon the foreman's' face as well, "That's what McCall said." Nick answered quietly._

_ "McCall." Tom looked up at his foreman and sighed as the man looked more than a bit uncomfortable. He was sure McCall had become more of a father figure to Nick in his absence. Another pang of guilt hit him. Tom shook his head; why should he be surprised? It's not like he'd been around to help with the child. "Just what else did McCall say?" Tom let go of Nick's arms and stood up, asking the question out of mere curiosity not out of any sense of jealousy._

_ "Said I should be treatin' mother the same as if she was a duchess," Nick answered as he lifted his eyes back up and looked at his father. _

_ Tom nodded and smiled at both his son and foreman. "McCall's right now, if you two will excuse me." He reached down and picked Audra up. "I need to go talk to your mother." Tom said as he disappeared into the house._

_ Nick looked up at McCall, who was standing and looking at him with a very disappointed look. "I didn't mean to be mean." Nick's eyes pled for his friend to believe him. "It just came out before I could think is all." _

_ McCall knelt down in front of Nick and gave him a sad smile before he chuckled just a little, "Yeah, I know how that is. Didn't do no good though, did it?" He asked as he laid a hand upon the boy's shoulder, feeling no need to get after him as Tom had already done that. Why should he add to it?_

_ "Nope," Nick shook his head sadly and then fought, unsuccessfully as more tears fell down his cheeks. "I just want my brother back!" he broke down sobbing again and McCall pulled him close. _

_ "I know you do. We all do." After a few minutes, McCall let go of Nick and stood up, his voice growing firmer. His friend's voice growing firmer made Nick sit up and take notice. "Now, why don't you go back inside and make things right with your parents?" After Nick turned around and ran into the house, McCall started walking around the ranch._

_ Where was Jarrod? McCall sighed fully accepting the fact that was a question that might never be answered. He took a hold of a fence post that had begun to tilt to one side. As he started working on making it so the post was once again straight, McCall began praying that and hoping that no matter what, this would only make the Barkleys stronger and not tear them apart._


	19. Time Marches On

**Man of Justice**

**I do not own The Big Valley or any of the original Barkle**_**y**_**s.**

**Chapter Nineteen**

_The wind, which had been behaving itself, now started blowing harder as Tom and Nick rode their horses around the ranch. After spending a couple of hours making up for lost time with his wife, Tom had promised Victoria he'd make sure he spent more time with Nick. Though, he'd made it clear they just needed to accept the fact that McCall would be, forevermore, a second father to the child. After all, too strong of a bond had been formed between the two. Which meant two things happened: They got used to jumping ten feet in the air when Nick slammed the front door shut and announced his presence by bellowing loud enough to wake the dead, and Tom made sure he had spare door hinges. They also suspected that, someday, he'd have to be bailed out of jail for fighting. After all, you could only break so many boards and kick so many buckets before your fist found its way across someone's chin._

_ When the two came to a stream that ran through the Barkley ranch, Tom and Nick dismounted. Nick stood looking into the stream. He could see a few fish swimming close to the surface and then watched as they continued on down the stream. "We should catch some for dinner. Mother could cook them."_

_ "That sounds fun maybe…" Tom caught himself just in time, for he was about to suggest that Jarrod could help them gut the fish. "Maybe," he quickly back tracked and finished the sentence, "we can even be nice enough to gut them for her before we take them home. Though, I think we best go check on the men and their work first. Don't you think?" he spoke with a tone of mock seriousness that made his son laugh._

_ "Yes, you never know. McCall might have given them the day off. You know how impetuous he is." Nick didn't really know what impetuous meant, but he'd heard his mother say the word on more than one occasion. If she was using the word, it must be okay for him to use._

_ Tom couldn't hide the grin that leapt up and onto his face. His roar of laughter rumbled through the air and over the ranch. Nick beamed; after all, it felt good to hear his father laugh and know he had something to do with it. They made their way back to their horses and were soon riding off in the direction that McCall and the other men were working._

_ From where he worked, McCall saw the two Barkleys approaching. It made him smile to see the bond repaired between father and son. Tom was right about one thing for sure, Nick was proving to be more of a cowboy than any of them. His ability to handle the cows, use a rope and a dozen other things, even at his young age, was astounding. He didn't know how, but in that moment Duke McCall knew that, someday, it would be Nick who would be his boss instead of Tom. Though, for the present, McCall simply went back to work while Tom and Nick inspected the work being done. Though, he and the other men had to bite their tongue at Nick's very much animated actions as he helped his father._

_**0000**_

_ A lone figure now clad in buckskin pants and a buckskin shirt stood by the river in the moonlight. Autumn had come to the Shoshone village and the summer loincloth had been put away. Jarrod had actually been standing in that spot since just before sunset looking at his reflection in the river. He'd been troubled when he'd found Nick's words coming back to him. "…you come back….you're you, but you ain't."_

_ Jarrod lifted up his right hand and ran it underneath his ever growing hair. Five months and it was already past his neck. He also thought how well he was now speaking Shoshone. That fact…the fact that he was speaking Shoshone fluently… had prompted his Shoshone father to ask about his white family just that morning. However, Straight Arrow had not pressed for answers when Jarrod found himself unable to talk about them. He could still see the scene from that morning in his head._

_ "I will never stop calling you son," Straight Arrow stood in the wigwam talking to Jarrod, "but you were made to come here, against your will." The man still remembered the anxious and terrified feeling he'd felt coming off Jarrod that first day he'd seen the lad. "If you have a white family, I can help you get back to them." The man was sincere in his offer, and Jarrod could hear it. Only problem was try as the man might Straight Arrow could not hide the pain that the statement brought out of his eyes. Oh, it wasn't for lack of trying, Jarrod just saw through him is all; a knack everyone was fast realizing the young boy had with everyone. _

_ Jarrod never felt such a struggle in his life. He missed his white family so much, but on the other hand his Shoshone father had given him so much and done his best by him. Even if Jarrod still thought it wrong the way a lot of Shoshone would __*****__steal horses from other tribes thus making many enemies. "Please, do not ask me about them for now." Jarrod had turned away from his "father" in order to hide the confusion and pain that resided in his soul. Unfortunely, Straight Arrow was sent a very unintentional message; Jarrod's white family must have had hurt him so bad he could not speak about them. Right then and there Straight Arrow vowed to never to speak on 'that subject again', unless his son started it, a choice that would only serve to lengthen Jarrod's stay with the Shoshone._

_ Again Jarrod ran his hand through his hair; how long would it get before the day Nick spoke about arrived? Jarrod dropped his hand back down by his side. More shocking to him was to find himself wondering if it would be wise to even go back; even if he ever had the chance. He knew how the majority of white people felt about the Indians. How would they accept a boy who had lived among them as he now had?_

_ So deep into thought was he that he didn't hear his friend, Raging River's Friend walk up beside him. The Shoshone youth was so named because he had, a number of times, fallen into a part of the river that should have pulled him under and drowned him only it hadn't. Each time, he'd managed to get out alive and make it back to the village. "You are troubled?" Raging River's Friend looked at the best friend he'd ever had and asked. He did not like seeing his friend this way. He'd do anything to help him._

_ Jarrod told him of the conversation that had taken place inside Straight Arrow's wigwam and then shook the melochany feeling off. "Why don't you see if we can go hunting tomorrow? We are both old enough. I mean you are fifteen and I'm over fourteen." _

_ "Let's do it!" Soon the two boys were running to the perspective wigwams to talk to their parents, or in Jarrod's case, parent to get their permission. By morning's light, the two boys were leaving the village with two other boys who had, somehow, joined the hunting trip._

00000

* Unlike sedentary tribes such as the Chumash, the Shoshone did not own much in terms of belongings and did not trade with others until they acquired horses in the 1700s. The ownership of horses served to differentiate the rich from the poor, but those who owned horses usually did as the result of theft, as the Shoshone would often conduct raids on other tribes to steal their horses. Because of this less than virtuous practice, the Shoshone had many enemies, but none so fierce as the Crow and Pocatello tribes, who's path they normally avoided crossing. (An exact quote off the internet, but the site won't let me post the link.)


	20. I am Shoshone

**Man of Justice**

**I do not own The Big Valley or any of the original Barkle**_**y**_**s.**

**Chapter Twenty**

_As time went by, Jarrod was indeed endearing himself more and more to the people of this village. He had quickly become more accustomed to their way of life and, though he was not accepted by all; he was accepted by the majority of the Shoshone. He had also developed a strong bond with a few of the boys his age. However, it was Jarrod's fierce loyalty to those he called his friends, their fierce loyalty to him and Jarrod's sense of justice and the knack he was quickly developing when it came to finding out the truth in any given situation…something many of them had already benefited from… that had really cemented his place in the village. _

_Jarrod and Raging River's Friend walked through the woods; they had been on yet another hunting trip. Their "friends"… the same ones who had accompanied them before… had turned around and gone home not moments after starting the trip. Jarrod and Raging River's Friend were talking about it too. Though, Jarrod's friend was speaking the loudest. "Probably left because you caught them in another one of their lies," Raging River's Friend chuckled and then sobered up. "I'm glad you did too. If you hadn't, their father would have come after us. They'd probably have claimed we forced them to come. I don't need any more trouble. The village still doubts my innocence."_

_ Jarrod knew what his friend meant. The boy had been falsely accused of stealing from the chief and it had almost cost him dearly, until Jarrod had stepped in and pointed out that when the missing items disappeared the lad had been with him and Straight Arrow. Some said the boys who made the accusation must have the time wrong, but the boys had not corrected their statement. Truth was, the boys were lying and would have changed the time, but the look Jarrod had in his eyes had the boys thinking that no matter what time they claimed the crime took place Jarrod would prove they lying about that too._

_ "I don't think you…" Jarrod stopped as the wheels in his mind started turning. The boys they had started the trip out with them were the same boys that had claimed they were sure it was Raging River's Friend who had gone, unnoticed, into the chief's hut. The older one, Sly Fox, had an off and on friendship with Raging River's Friend, but time and time again the lad had lost out on some "reward" during some celebration because Raging River's Friend won the contest he happened to be in. _

_ "What is it?" his friend asked as he saw the look of someone deep in thought come upon Jarrod's face._

_ "Did you say our 'friends' won't let you behind their home anymore?" Jarrod was remembering a comment Raging River's Friend had made the day before. At the time, Jarrod had thought it odd, but said nothing, not wanting to cause any unnecessary trouble._

_ "Yes, w…" his friend stopped as he saw what Jarrod was getting at. The two turned around and ran back down the hill feeling certain the stolen items were behind their "friends'" home and hoping they could get one of the elders to listen to them so they could look before the items got moved. That is, if they were indeed there._

_ Straight Arrow was just entering his wigwam when he saw his son and friend running towards him. Instinctively he knew something was wrong and he started towards the boys in great haste. When the three met Straight Arrow looked at his son and asked, "Im-hock-im?"_

_ Jarrod caught his breath and answered, "It's not where we've been that is important; it's where we're going." He hurried to explain what his suspicions were and why he thought the way he did. "Give us a chance to look, please. I am sure the boys took the things and are trying to get my friend thrown out of the village." By this time Jarrod was talking without any trouble and standing as tall as he could with an air of confidence his father had not see before. _

_ "If you are wrong, it is you that the village will throw out my son." Straight Arrow gave Jarrod a firm warning; he had to. For he knew he spoke the truth and two, he did not want to lose another son, not like this anyway._

_ Jarrod felt a fire rising up inside him, not a wild or angry one, just one that demanded the truth be found and his friend's name cleared once and for all. *"Tow-me-ah." Jarrod answered with his head held high._

_ Straight Arrow turned and headed for the home of the two boys who made the accusations occupied, but not before insisting they get the chief. If Jarrod was right, the chief needed to be to get his things back. If he was wrong, Straight Arrow made himself stop thinking. He had to or he would have turned around and gone home._

_ By the time Straight Arrow explained to the chief what was going on and the small group had reached the wickiup where the boys lived that Jarrod was accusing of the theft, most of the village were either with them, or were watching from a distance._

_ "What is going on?" Sly Fox's father asked, surprised by the crowd gathering, as he stepped out of his home. When he was told that Straight Arrow, his son and Raging River's Friend wanted to look behind the man's home; the man got angry._

_ "They are just trying to put the blame onto my boys. Who is to say they did not put the items back there themselves?" _

_ "Yes, they are the thieves and making it look like we did it." Sly Fox spoke up._

_ The accusation might have had some weight only Straight Arrow, who had witnessed Raging River's Friend being chased away from the wigwam on more than one occasion and knew Jarrod well enough to vouch for him, spoke up, "Your boys do not allow them near your home. They are kept a constant eye on them." He then, unknowingly, spilled the beans on the accused. He'd seen the boys join Jarrod at the beginning of the hunting trip but said nothing, assuming the boys had their father's permission, "If my son and his friend were not so forgiving and polite, if they had done as you claim, they'd never have allowed your sons to start on their hunting trip with them."_

_ The father glared at his sons, silently questioning the truth of the situation. He had not known about the hunting trip or given his sons permission to go on one with Jarrod and Raging River's Friend. He wondered what other deceptions his sons had contrived, though he was not about to lose face in front of his people. _

_Immediately, Straight Arrow and everyone else knew the father had been in the dark when it came to that one as he glared at the boys and began shouting. It would have gone on only the chief demanded that they search the area Jarrod wanted them to look in. Not fifteen minutes later, Sly Fox was being disowned by his father and thrown out of the village. At sixteen the man wasn't worried the boy couldn't fend for himself. His brother would have been kicked out also, but Sly Fox admitted he had acted alone and then forced his brother to keep his mouth shut._

_ Jarrod watched the boy leave and felt bad for him, but what was he supposed to do? Let an innocent party pay for what another one had done? His attention was drawn off the outcast when he realized his father and chief were talking to him…and the whole village was listening. "You have proven more than once you are a one of honesty," the chief took a step towards him as a hush fell over the gathered Shoshone, "you have proven you will not stand aside when another's reputation is at stake and you know, or suspect, they are innocent. You have kept a young boy, innocent of any wrong doing, from being banished from his family. A boy would not have acted in such a manner. You are no longer a boy," the chief paused and smiled, "You are a man, and your name is Man of Justice."_

_ Jarrod could hear the ripples of approval that rolled through the Shoshone. _

_ Straight Arrow smiled as he took a step towards his son. "Hog-y-nock?"_

_ How did he feel? Jarrod stood even straighter than he had before. His friend's name was cleared, his father was pleased with him and, in the eyes of this people, he was now a man. "I am fine," Jarrod grinned from ear to ear, "I am Man of Justice; I am a Shoshone." _

_*"Tow-me-ah = Let us go._

_* "Hog-y-nock?" =How do you feel?_


	21. First Hope

**Man of Justice**

**I do not own The Big Valley or any of the original Barkle**_**y**_**s.**

**Chapter Twenty-One**

_Victoria stood outside the huge white stucco home Tom had had built for the family, their new infant son, Eugene, in her arms, Audra ran around on the grass and Nick stood beside McCall. For the second time in thirteen months, Tom found was saddling his horse and preparing for a journey, one they all hoped was not a waste of time. It was being made due to an unexpected visitor they'd had the day before._

_Brandon Justin, a gold prospector from *Pair of Dice, had been visiting relatives in Stockton. He had met the Barkleys when he had accompanied his brother to a business meeting with Tom. Things had gone fine until Brandon had stepped into the living room and seen an old family portrait of the Barkleys. The fact that the man had caught his breath had grabbed Victoria and Tom's attention. When they asked him what the problem was he'd pointed to Jarrod and asked, "Is that yer boy?"_

_"Yes, but we lost him last year. Why?" Tom found himself holding his breath and keeping an eye on their visitor and a hold of his wife's arm._

_"Lost him? How?" Brandon asked cautiously; not wanting to say anything if the boy had simply died from some illness or accident._

_"Modoc attacked the wagon train he was on and grabbed him killed most everyone else." Tom answered and then again asked again why the man was asking, his tone on the verge of a demand rather than a request. Tom suppressed his desperate emotions, but he needed to know the reasons for the man's obvious interest in about Jarrod._

_"Modoc, huh?" Brandon shook his head assuming he was wrong about whom he thought the boy was. Still, he answered, "Well, put yer boy into buckskin clothin' and make his hair ten times longer and yer son's twin's livin' near the Feather River among the Shoshone. They call him Man of Justice. I'm sorry I can't give ya more details, I only just settled in that area and have been so busy it's a miracle I know what little I do about the people, white or Shoshone. In fact, I would still be gettin' settled into the area, but my brother pestered me to no end 'bout visitin' Stockton." The man had then been pulled out of the house by his brother who had ridden hard to get to the ranch, as Brandon's son had fallen and injured himself in town. That being the case, the prospector had excused himself and left as fast as he could. _

_Tom and Victoria talked well into the night. The next morning Tom discussed their plans with McCall. He noticed Nick, standing nearby and called the eleven year old over, including him in the discussions. It was decided that Tom would make the trip to Feather River and visit the Shoshone in spite of what Brandon had said about the way whites weren't exactly welcome in the village. Though, he would stop in at the trading post just outside Pair of Dice and get new supplies, along with finding someone who knew the Shoshone well enough to go with him._

_Nick took hope and comfort in his father's actions, and he stood there without commenting listening to McCall and his father discuss the journey. _

_Before mounting his horse Tom squeezed his boy's shoulders. "We don't know fer sure Nick that it's him, but there's no harm in hoping. Just do me a favor, don't let it worry you or throw temper tantrums in front of your mother."_

_Nick smiled and nodded, "Yes father." _

_Tom mounted his horse. "Take care of your mother, Nick." Tom leaned forward in his saddle, his eyes and voice pled with his son to listen to him. "She needs your help worse than ever. I'm depending on you. McCall is here to help you too. Don't be afraid to tell him if you need anything." Tom looked at McCall letting his eyes send a similar message to his foreman. McCall simply nodded and hoped for the best._

_"Yes, father." Nick threw his shoulders back as he did his best to hide the fear he felt. "I'll behave myself," he said and then added, due to the grin that came onto McCall and his mother's faces, "well, unless I find a few boards that need to be busted." That had everyone chuckling and, for a few seconds, the tension that hung in the air was gone. Tom then turned his horse around and rode off._

_**0000**_

_Straight Arrow looked at his son. The storm clouds that gathered were brighter than the mood Man of Justice seemed to be in. He'd been down all morning, but now the mood was getting heavier and the older Shoshone did not like it. Many of the Shoshone people relied heavily upon this son of his to help them when they had a problem to solve and answers to find, even if he was just over fifteen. Was it too much too soon or was it…he stopped his thoughts and walked up to his son and stated firmly, yet not harshly, "Hin-ah-mus?"_

_Man of Justice sighed. How was he supposed to tell the man he had learned to love dearly he didn't know exactly what it was? After all, he didn't understand himself, only that he sensed another huge change was coming and that made him nervous. "Ka-mah-shum-ben-y." He sighed, he didn't know. _

_While Straight Arrow had kept his promise never to press his son to talk about his past, a strong impression come over him, one that told him to stop worrying about his son's capability when it came to helping those in need of justice, or dealing with life in general and to start questioning his son about his past. That being the case, Straight Arrow insisted that he and Man of Justice have a talk, outside, as straight Arrow's s new wife was in the wigwam working on mending a few items. "Come, let us walk." Straight Arrow said as he walked out of his, Man of Justice followed._

_"Tell me about your white family." Straight Arrow sent a wave of surprise through his son as they walked alongside the river that had lulled him to sleep on more than one occasion. _

_Man of Justice stopped momentarily. Shocked mostly, because he had not thought about them in some time…not that he'd ceased caring or had forgotten, but because it hurt to think about the Barkleys; he hadn't wanted feel the pain._

_"My white parents are good people; they work hard and are honest. I have a brother, Nick and a sister Audra. Maybe, they have another one by now; they said they wanted at least one more. Who knows? Why do you ask?" Man of Justice was growing more uncomfortable and he didn't like that._

_Straight Arrow's eyebrows turned down and he asked confused, "If they are good people, why did you act so upset when I asked about them before and offered to help get you back to them?"_

_Man of Justice's shoulders sagged as he fought to find the words he needed. "They were not my family anymore…you were." The young man sat down on a nearby boulder and gazed over the river. "I am a Shoshone, I have gone through many changes and am not the same as I once was. Besides, they are far away. Why talk about them?" he paused and then added softly, "It's just…why do they press themselves upon my mind now?" That's what the real problem was, the fact that he'd gone to bed more than one time that week only to find his white father calling him, trying to find him. It unsettled him as he had enough to deal with. He found himself telling his Shoshone father about the dreams._

_Straight Arrow felt his heart go out to his son and out to Man of Justice's white father. "I did wrong by not making you talk sooner." He laid his hand upon his son's shoulder, one he considered to be a full grown brave. "You and I might consider you Shoshone, our people might, but your white father would not. If he is calling you in your dreams, there is a reason you need to go back. We must go to the trading post and find someone who can tell us how to get you back to the world of your white father. That is, if that is what you decide to do." The man's voice cracked as he finished speaking and he fought the tears in heart. He might be speaking the truth, but it still hurt him just as bad as the day he'd lost his first son. And even as tempting as it was, he knew he couldn't keep this son any longer if he decided to go. After all, Man of Justice was no longer a boy._

_Man of Justice did not fight his Shoshone father as the man embraced him. In fact, his embrace was just as strong, if not stronger, than Straight Arrow's. "Let's go hunting first." He pulled away from his Shoshone father and did his best to smile. "Let's forget I might have to leave for just a few more days." He did not want to deal with the fear of entering back into a world he no longer knew or the way others might look upon him at the moment. It was a request Straight Arrow readily agreed to._

_**TBC**_

_*__ An online friend of mine who lives in California told me that Paradise, California used to a pretty lawless town and was called Pair of Dice. When things started changing for the better, the name was changed._

_** Meaning of Shoshone words, according to the book I have in front of me. _

_Hin-ah-mus= What is it?_

_Ka-mah-shum-ben-y=I don't know._


	22. It's Him

**Man of Justice**

**I do not own The Big Valley or any of the original Barkle**_**y**_**s.**

**Chapter Twenty-Two**

_One by one the members of the Shoshone village gathered in a celebration to honor Man of Justice. All were in awe of the young man who had proved, quite successfully, to be wise beyond his years. The young white brave had kept many injustices from being committed, or caught the real culprits after the fact. Many were saddened to learn that Straight Arrow had talked to the chief and the medicine man and that, together, the three decided that Straight Arrow was right…the young man known to them as Man of Justice might very well be going back to his white family._

_ The music of the Shoshone rang through the air as the feast that had been prepared was passed around. Men and women talked while young children played. Raging River's Friend made his way through the crowd that had gathered and walked up to the young man that had become his best friend. A part of him still did not believe what he'd been told. "Car-ney-im-me-ah-how?" He asked the question as if he thought that by asking it reality would change._

_ Was he going home? Man of Justice sighed as he looked around. This village had been his home for fifteen months. He'd laughed, worked, played…even grieved here. He had friends and, he looked to where his Shoshone father and new mother stood. He didn't want to leave, yet there were his dreams and Straight Arrow insisted they mean he needed to go back to the white world. Slowly, he nodded and answered, "Hah-car-ney-nea-me-ah." Yes, he was going home; well, he paused and shrugged his shoulders correcting himself as he really wasn't sure yet, but the chances were high._

_ Raging River's Friend laid his hand upon Man of Justice's shoulder and, with every fiber in his soul asked, "Im-him-by-coy?"_

_ The question tore into Man of Justice's heart and soul. How could he say when, or even if, he would be back? That is, if he did indeed leave? He could not see the future now any better than when his white brother asked him about his dreams. With much sadness in his voice, Man of Justice answered simply, *"Ka-mah-shum-ben-y." __What else could he say? He __**didn't**__ know_.

_**00000**_

_ It had been a quite a journey for Tom and Jim what with horseshoes that came off and accidentally taking a wrong road, but they had at last reached Pair of Dice. Once they'd gotten directions to the trading post, Tom and Jim had hurried to the establishment. They now stood outside Pair of dice's trading post with Jim talking to the owner; a man by the name of Paul Hopkins, a rather plump fellow with little hair but friendly enough. "You're looking for your son?" the man's eyes were wide in disbelief. He might not hate the Indians or hold the fact that some whites lived, or had lived, among them but he knew many who did not feel the same way. Very few men he knew would look for a son after this much time, especially if he was with the Indians. _

_ "I was told there was a white boy living with the Shoshone." Tom did not feel like repeating what he'd just said, so he simply went ahead and explained why he'd come to Pair of Dice. "I was told that, if it's not my son, he could pass for his twin. I want to see him so I know which the case is. Do you know of such a boy?" He asked making sure his expression remained solid as a rock; his eyes set firm and an air of one with a determined attitude in his voice. He didn't feel like fighting the man, but he felt less like explaining the whole story over again._

_ Paul nodded. "I don't know if the lad is your boy or his twin, but yes, I have met such a young man. He has been in a number of times with his father and other family members." He hurried to add as he saw the way the man called Tom Barkley stiffened when he said father and family. "Look, whether or not he's your son doesn't make a difference. He calls the man father and talks about his uncle, aunts and cousins. Sir," Paul said as he rubbed his chin, doing his best to choose his words carefully, "Have you stopped to think that, even if this boy is your lost son, he might not want to go with you? I mean, it's been just over a year now you said. He might have, out of a need to survive mind you, grown attached to his Shoshone father and the tribe; he might not see leaving as an option." He hated to point that out to the man, but he'd seen such a situation before and… well someone had to raise the possibility._

_ Tom drew a heavy breath, as did Jim. It was something that had presented itself to both of them…but neither man had ever allowed themselves to entertain the thought in their minds for very long. "I have to see him." Tom replied. "For the sake of my family __**and**__ my son, I have to try." Just then the three heard horses approaching, they turned around and looked so see who was coming._

_ Tom felt as if someone had just hit him below the belt for he saw two men and a young man riding towards the trading post. Because he was not overly concerned with the two adults, Tom did not dwell on them but a few seconds. The young man was a different story. After a few minutes of studying him, Tom knew the young man meant everything to him. For without a shadow of a doubt; the young man dressed again in buckskin pants, a buckskin shirt and moccasins with dark brown hair hanging to the middle of his back __**was**__ his missing son...even if he had gone through a growing spurt. Nothing else went through Toms mind except the joy and relief of finally seeing his boy alive, and he imagined the day he would return him home to his mother. _

_Jim could see the steel resolve of Tom Barkley grow at the sight of his boy, but like Paul had suggested, he couldn't help but wonder would Jarrod leave the Shoshone and go to Stockton with them. More important yet, if he did, would he stay?_

**TBC**

_Car-ney-im-me-ah-how? =Are you going home?_

_Hah-car-ney-nea-me-ah = Yes, I am going home._

_Im-him-by-coy = When will you come back?_

_Ka-mah-shum-ben-y =I don't know._


	23. A Talk and Going Home

**Man of Justice**

**I do not own The Big Valley or any of the original Barkle**_**y**_**s.**

**Chapter Twenty-Three**

_Tom sat beside the campfire, next to Jim and across from Jarrod. He was feeling everything from the greatest joy a man could know to the greatest sorrow he'd ever felt. He had his son back, but he didn't. His fifteen year old son sat crossed legged, still wearing the buckskin clothing he'd worn to the trading post and not speaking a word. Tom's mind wandered back to the moment Jarrod and the men he was with stopped in front of the trading post and the subsequent visit. _

_He'd taken a step towards his son only to have Mr. Hopkins reach out and stop him. "If I were you, I'd wait to see your boy's reaction to you." Tom had, reluctantly, watched as the men and his son dismounted their horses._

_Because Straight Arrow had kept a eye not only on his son, but all those they had passed or were approaching, Tom's knee jerk reaction, along with Mr. Hopkin's actions, told him he would not have to worry about getting Man of Justice back to this place called Stockton. He looked from Paul to Tom and then back to Paul. "Is he looking for Man of Justice?" he asked, knowing full well Paul was fluent in the language of the Shoshone people._

_Paul's shock showed on his face. He had not expected such a question so quickly. He nodded and replied, "Os,hah." What else was he supposed to say? He knew this Indian well enough to know that you did not give him long winded answers or explanations, as that would only convince him you were trying to hide something. _

_Straight Arrow looked at the man he would always consider to be his son. He saw fear, concern and…he sighed…a longing for something lost in his eyes. "He is your white father?" he asked knowing, somehow, what the answer would be._

_For a moment, the young man who now considered himself to be Man of Justice thought of denying it, but no, that would not be honorable and show great dishonor to both men. That was something he did not wish to do… dishonor either father. "Os,hah." Jarrod answered slowly, noting Tom's ever so startled reaction to hearing Jarrod speaking Shoshone instead of English._

_Straight Arrow looked at Mr. Hopkins. "Nea-tag-win-o-yont-im-a-nah-re-wing-gen?" _

_"Os,hah." He turned looked at Tom. "He wants me to translate everything he says to you, I simply told him yes. Only do you mind if I ask him, your son and the two of you inside? There is a table we can sit at or, if he insists, the floor is better than this dirt."_

_Tom nodded, as did Jim. Neither one of them felt like taking the possibility of becoming a show to anyone who might happen by. "Fine with me,"_

_Paul then turned back to his visitors and repeated his request. Straight Arrow nodded and he, along with Man of Justice, followed them inside while the friend who had accompanied Straight Arrow and he to the trading post stayed outside. Once inside Paul began pulling some chairs away from a nearby table, not to be surprised when Straight Arrow and Mr. Barkley's son sat cross legged on the floor._

_It took everything Tom had in him to do the same, only he wanted his son back. He knew, if he showed any signs of what Jarrod might see as disrespect towards the people who he'd been living with and who had most likely protected him and kept him alive, lose any chance he had with him. For the sake of his boss, Jim did the same. Paul then joined all four of them._

_While Straight Arrow knew what he was about to ask a question that might sound stupid, he spoke the words that came into his mind. "Hin-ahnt?" He wasn't a bit surprised…and smothered a laugh...when a look of disbelief appeared on Mr. Hopkin's face._

_"What did he ask?" Tom, who had noticed the look, demanded to know._

_"He is asking what you want." Paul answered with a look of 'I can't believe those words came out of his mouth'._

_Tom found his heart beating a bit faster as he looked upon the unreadable expression on Jarrod's face. "I want to talk Jarrod; I want to talk to my son." He looked Straight Arrow in the eye even though he knew Paul would have to translate. Paul did just that. _

_All noticed Jarrod stiffened ever so slightly the moment Tom had spoken the words. Naturally, Tom assumed it was because he understood every word and was simply choosing not to speak. Of course, that thought sent pain through the very center of him as the guilt resurfaced; he couldn't help but wonder if Jarrod blamed him for the Modoc taking him. Not knowing what Horse Breaker had done, Tom was left to wonder how Jarrod wound up with the Shoshone. _

_Jarrod looked at his Shoshone father and then to Tom. "My name is Man of Justice." Then, due to a long conversation he'd had with Straight Arrow, he added, "I am no man's son yet. I have not chosen. Does he think to make me choose today?"_

_While Paul was hesitant to repeat the words, he did so at Tom's demand. Again Tom had to fight himself, as he wanted to reach over and shake Jarrod in hopes it would 'bring him to his senses', but he knew that was a childish reaction. Though, he was confused. Jarrod had grown up speaking English, he obviously understood everything he'd said, so why speak in Shoshone? Then again, as he thought on it, maybe it was simply so the man who had been raising him would not be left out. "No," Tom answered even though it meant he might have to wire Victoria and tell her he needed more time, "though I need to be heading back to Stockton soon, a couple of days at most."_

_Again, due to the talks Jarrod and he had had, Straight Arrow again spoke. "If Man of Justice chooses you, can you be patience with Man of Justice while he adjusts back to your world? Or will you expect him to make the change 'without troubles and doubts?" It never ceased to amaze Straight Arrow when he heard stories of human beings doing that to another._

_Tom was brought out of his review of earlier events and thoughts as the son he'd finally been reunited with stood up and went to lie down underneath his blanket. It had taken almost five hours of talking, through Paul, and twenty four hours of waiting before Jarrod had said he would go back to Stockton as long as Tom did not ask him to dress in anything but the clothes of a Shoshone, cut his hair or call him anything but Man of Justice until he decided to make the changes himself. Straight Arrow also made it clear as the noon day sun that if, for any reason, Jarrod needed to return all he had to do was ride into the village._

_"Do you think he'll be able to make the adjustment?" Jim asked very cautiously; he didn't want to upset his boss._

_Tom gazed into the fire and thought of Victoria, the children, the ranch and the "good" people of Stockton. "I hope so; I truly hope so." His whispered answer was almost inaudible. The rest of the evening was spent in silence as Tom made plans to write a letter in the morning. The letter would explain everything to his family, including the fact that he'd be making the return trip home slower than usual. Tom planned to do that in order to give Jarrod and him more time to get reacquainted._

** 000000**

"Nea-tag-win-o-yont-im-a-nah-re-wing-gen?" =Will you translate eveything I say?

Os,hah = Yes

Hin-ahnt =What do you want?


	24. Chapter 24

**Man of Justice**

**I do not own The Big Valley or any of the original Barkle**_**y**_**s.**

**Chapter Twenty-Four**

By the time Nick got to the part where Jarrod and Tom were reunited he'd grabbed a few rocks and thrown them, along with busting a few boards…and he was doing it all again. Heath might have wanted to tell him to stop it and continue the story only he sat patiently waiting for the latest fit to be thrown. When he finally stopped, Nick sat back down and sighed.

"Father could have made it home from Pair of Dice in a week but he took ten days, sending telegrams along the way to keep us from worryin' too much. For a long time I resented that, only looking back on it," Nick gave a half hearted chuckle mixed with a sound of lingering bitterness, "it was probably for the best. It was hard enough handling that adjustment period with warning and preparation time, I'd have hated to see what would have happened if they'd come straight home." He leaned back and slipped back in the storytelling mode, backing up to what Jarrod had told him, years later, about the return trip.

_Tom and Jim saddled their horses while Jarrod mounted his horse bareback, even if he'd had a chance to take one of the Shoshone's *"saddles" he had chosen not to. It made a part of Tom cringe. It's not that he hated the Indians; far from it. After all, he and Victoria had helped more than one Indian and other people out many times. Still, this was his son and he was white. He said nothing though as the three headed out of camp. _

_ The silence between father and son was more than a bit uncomfortable. The few times Tom did try to talk to his son he only got two reactions; Jarrod looking away, or seeing pain in his son's eyes as the boy couldn't seem to find the English words to reply to Tom. Tom was confused. He realized his assumption at the trading post had been wrong, but he couldn't imagine that Jarrod would forget the language that fast either. It wasn't until Jim stepped in and spoke up was he able to see at least a portion of the problem. "Mr. Barkley," Jim spoke slowly and carefully, "Boy's been immersed in the language of the Shoshone and heard no English in that time-remember Mr. Hopkins admitted on the occasions your son showed up at the trading post he was always speaking Shoshone and Mr. Hopkins, knowing the language, responded in it. Remember how he reacted at the trading post? Ten to one he understands __**every**__ word we're saying__.__ You just got to give him time to get the right words to come out of his mouth. Not only will his English be rusty, but I'm sure he has other issues he'll have to deal with." He wasn't about to guess just what all those issues might be._

_ That statement had been verified when Jarrod had actually given the man a quick, and it was __**extremely**__ quick, smile before slipping back on his unreadable mask been wearing ever since he rode up to the Trading Post. Seeing Jim's point and Jarrod's lightening fast smile, Tom accepted the man was right. As fast as they could have gotten to Chico, Tom decided not to push it, and they wound up camping out the second night also. _

_ Jarrod sat up and, thinking the men were asleep, stood up and noiselessly moved across the opening field and climbed up on a medium sized boulder. The night air was felt well, but he felt restrained and unsettled. He looked at his clothes and realized that, while it had been wise of Straight Arrow to keep the loincloth, he just had to get the blasted shirt off. It didn't take him two seconds to have the shirt lying on the rock and letting the air cool his skin off. Two voices seemed to fight inside his head, one telling him he was a Shoshone and the other telling him to let things go and act white again. With his world being turned upside down yet again, Jarrod left the shirt where it was and let the breeze, which was picking up just enough to play tag with his long hair, and took comfort from the familiarity of the wind._

_ Tom, who had not been able to sleep, rolled over and watched as Jarrod moved through the clearing, climbed the rock and removed his shirt. He shook his head slightly. He remembered, when Jarrod had finally agreed to go back to the white world, how his son had admitted the only reason he was not dressed the same as Straight Arrow was because he knew there was a high chance he would indeed be leaving the world of the Shoshone. "It's the wrong time of year for anything but loincloth and moccasins in their world." Mr. Hopkins had explained. A part of Tom wanted go over and tell his son to put his shirt back on… that they weren't working out in the fields and that he needed to be wearing it. The other half kept telling him to leave it alone and let his boy decide when it was time to return to the ways of his heritage. _

_ "Let him be." Jim shocked Tom by speaking the moment that he had decided that Jarrod had had enough time by himself and started to stand up. "Unless you want to chase him away, believe me…" the man paused and then added softly, "I know."_

_ That rattled Tom to the core and he quickly lay down again. "You lost someone to the Indians?" He asked softly. He was shocked; Jim had never said a word. Then again, Jim seldom said anything; he was always on the quiet side._

_ "A sister, seven years ago, found her but my parents pushed too hard, they weren't patient as they were warned to be. She fled back to her Paiute family. My parents never saw her again and I," he paused as his voice broke, "saw her only once, she was with her Paiute husband. She was happy, but she was also sad. Don't do that to Jarrod." The man said nothing more._

_ Tom lay awake until he heard Jarrod lifting his own blanket up and lying back down. Lying under the night stars and bright moon, Tom vowed he would not lose his son again. "__**I will be patient**__." Only when Jarrod had slipped his shirt back on and made it his way to the bedroll Tom had bought for him was Tom able to relax and go to sleep._


	25. Chico

**Man of Justice**

**I do not own The Big Valley or any of the original Barkle**_**y**_**s.**

**Chapter Twenty-Five**

_It was almost noon when Tom, Jarrod and Jim rode into Chico. It seemed as if every eye in the small town was upon the three visitors. Tom was sure it was not only because they were strangers, but also because of his son's appearance. The whispers that could be heard up and down the street only cemented that fact into his head; it did the same for Jarrod and Jim. When they came to the café, Tom hesitated. Would the establishment serve them or would the owners ask them to leave. It was a concern he fast found out he would not have to worry about for the moment, as Jarrod refused to get off his horse when Tom and Jim dismounted theirs._

_ Jarrod remembered sitting around the table many times and eating with his family; he'd also not sat at a table and ate with "proper" utensils for close to fifteen months. Oh, he was sure he could pick up the tools and use them easily enough, yet he found himself unable to budge off his horse. As hungry as Tom was, he wasn't about to leave his son outside by himself. "You go grab a bit to eat, Jim. Grab us some sandwiches while you're at, please. We'll go and see if this small town has a boarding house, and then I'll take the horses to the livery stable." Tom remounted his horse, took the reins to Jim's horse, and started down the street with Jarrod following him._

_ He was relieved to see a two story home at the end of town with a sign that said "Williams' Boarding House". He dismounted his horse, tying it and Jim's horse to the nearby hitching post. "We need to get a room for the night, J…" Tom caught himself as he remembered both his promise and his vow, "…Man of Justice. Please, come with me." _

_ Jarrod didn't want to go into the house anymore than he had the cafe, but he'd caught Tom's slip and heard him correct himself. His father had always been a man of honor; it seemed he still was. The least he could do was show him respect for that. He dismounted his horse, tied it to the same hitching post, meant only for the short term use of visitors, and followed Tom inside._

_ The Widow Williams was a tall, slender English woman who had little tolerance for a lot of things. Unfortunately, that included people who were not "the same" as she was. While the business side of her was insisting she serve both the older gentleman and the "heathen" next to him; the other side won. "His kind is not welcome here. He'll have to leave." She stiffened in revulsion as she looked upon Jarrod._

_ Tom's blood boiled. While he did not hit her with her fists, he let loose with his tongue. "First off, the Indians are just as good as the white man is, sometimes better and two, Man of Justice is my son! I just got him back! He stays with me!"_

_ Jarrod didn't know if Tom, given the time, could make the woman see reason or not, nor did he intend to find out. Before his father could say anything and before the woman had time to react to Tom's words, Jarrod left the building. Tom cursed under his breath and went after his son. When he exited the house, Jarrod was standing by his horse talking to the animal… in Shoshone._

_ "Well, we slept out last night." Tom did his best to lighten the mood that the bigoted woman's words had created. "We can do it again. There's a river not far from here," He glanced towards the café, "suppose we ought to tell Jim we'll be down there." He smiled sadly, as he remounted his horse._

_ Jarrod stood, for a moment, looking from the boarding house to his father. He didn't know why, but he'd expected his father to get a room while he simply found someplace, maybe the stalls, to sleep. Yet, here the man was giving up what he would see as a comfortable bed to lie, yet again, to sleep upon the ground below his feet. Jarrod pulled himself up and onto the back of his horse and followed Tom down to the cafe, his concerns about returning to the white world growing due to the Widow Williams treatment of him._

_ When they reached the café, Jim was standing outside. He had a bag in his hands that held three sandwiches and some fruit. Repeating what he'd just said to his son, Tom handed Jim the reins to his horse. "I'm sure there's a nice camping spot." _

_ Jim felt the same disgust Tom had. Because the waitress, one Mrs. O'Toole had told him about the boarding house, and the woman who ran it, he had feared this might happen; hence the reason for grabbing sandwiches for all of them. "Fine with me, I always preferred camping out to anything." Within seconds he was following Tom and Jarrod out of town and down to the creek. It didn't take long for them to find a spot to make camp once more._

_ Once they'd laid out their bedding, Tom handed out the sandwiches, insisted on blessing the food, adding a silent prayer of thanks and then began eating. Having accepted Jarrod, for now, could not answer any questions for him, Tom decided it might be a better idea to do the talking himself. After all, the more his oldest heard the language, the faster he'd be speaking it again…at least, that is what Tom hoped. "I wrote your mother and told her you were coming home. I'm sure she's told Nick by now and even Audra, though your sister is really too young to understand it all." Tom turned at looked at Jarrod; he wasn't surprised when he saw no emotion in the young man's eyes. He looked at Jim, who looked as helpless as Tom felt. "You have a new brother, name's Eugene. I think you're mother has given up on getting another girl." Tom smiled, then mused at the memory, when he'd jokingly suggested they try again, Victoria had kicked him out of the bedroom and locked the door. However, that part was something Tom saw no reason to disclose._

_ Jarrod wanted to say something, do something, anything to show his father he understood what he was saying, but his heart was still feeling empty and out of sorts. Jarrod was still very much conflicted in his emotions. He'd been put in a position where he had to choose between two homes and all of a sudden he found himself resenting it worse than ever. He stood up and headed for his blanket and then stopped. He might be feeling worse than confused, but he also knew the man Tom Barkley had to be just as frustrated as he was. Turning around slowly, Jarrod looked at Tom, really looked at him. It shook him to the core to see the same look of pain that was in the man's eyes that had resided in Straight Arrow's. He had promised his Shoshone father never to do that…be the cause of another man's pain if he could help it, yet he did not know what to do to help Tom's hurt. Digging hard to find the word he wanted, the one word he hoped would convey how what he was feeling, Jarrod finally pulled up the only one he could get to come up with. "S…or…ry," Jarrod turned back around and went to lie down. It might be noon, but he was tired._

_ Tom and Jim looked at each other shocked to hear the first English word out of Jarrod's mouth be an apology. Tom swore more than ever he would be patience with the boy and, someday, make sure he understood he had nothing to be sorry for._


	26. Nick Finds Out

**Man of Justice**

**I do not own The Big Valley or any of the original Barkle**_**y**_**s.**

**Chapter Twenty-Six**

_Victoria sat on one end of the living room couch while Nick sat on the other. She'd called him in from helping McCall after reading Tom's letter, but not before talking to McCall and asking him to prepare the men for Jarrod's return. Now she looked at Nick, hoping the child would be able to handle the news. "I heard from your father today; he's bringing Jarrod home."_

_ Nick's eyes widened in shock, his dream came flooding back reminding of the changes that were supposed to have come upon his brother. Sure a part of him wanted Jarrod home, the other half was terrified. The uneasy feeling he had grew as his mother started speaking again; she'd paused as to give him time to digest the news. "There are a few things we need to be prepared to accept, some changes." She added only to herself, not feeling like an eleven year old boy should have to deal with more than necessary. __**"Changes that will eventually go away, I hope."**_

_ Nick felt his heart skip a beat. So, he'd been right from the beginning! "What changes?" He barked louder than he meant to and found his mother giving him a hard glare. "Sorry, mother." Nick lowered his voice and quickly apologized._

_ Inwardly, Victoria prayed for strength to deal with her middle son. "Your brother won't be dressing like the rest of us, not for some time I'm afraid. He'll be dressed more like Hawk." Hawk, who was a seasonal employee of the Barkleys, had lived in the mountains most of his life and dressed in clothing made from buckskin. "From what your father says Jarrod can understand everything that is said to him." She paused again wondering how Nick would handle the next bit of information, and then she started speaking again, "he won't be able to answer us, not until he can get used to speaking English again. Remember, he's been living among the Shoshone Indians and speaking their language." She wasn't surprised when Nick stiffened and stared at her._

_ "And, Nick," she took a deep breath and finished, "he has a Shoshone name, one we need to call him until he wants it changed it back to Jarrod. We are to call him Man of Justice." She waited for the explosion she felt was sure would be coming, knowing the last part would upset him. She was right, though she was still shocked by what he said._

_ Nick jumped to his feet, "I thought you said father was bringin' my brother home! It doesn't sound like it! It sounds like he's bringin' an Indian home! Why didn't he just leave him where he was at?" It's not that Nick had been taught to hate Indians, or that he chose to hate them on his own. He didn't. It's just that he'd heard how the lives of those in such a position were and, at times, how they were treated as outcasts. It made him afraid for Jarrod._

_ Not knowing the things her son had overheard, Victoria assumed Nick was simply reacting very badly to a situation he had no control over and one he could not understand. Still, stressed with the news her husband's letter brought and tired from a long night with her infant son, Victoria barked back, "Nicolas Jonathon Barkley! He is my son, your brother and he is coming home! The least you can do is accept that and welcome him back! He will need our help! Especially since I am sure others will not be so kind!" Nick was too angry to listen though and he turned around and ran out the front door, slamming it shut on his way out. She might have gone after him, only the slamming door had awakened Eugene and the infant was now crying._

_ Tears ran down Nick's face as he headed for the corral, though he was brought up short once it came into view. He couldn't believe what he saw. McCall was fighting with one of the men and the other hands were standing off to the side looking as uneasy as a rattlesnake's prey. Nick hurried and wiped away his tears. He then ran up and stood next to one of the hands and watched. By the time the fight was through, Thad Hansen lay on his side in the dirt while McCall started bellowing loud enough even a deaf man would have been able to hear him. "If any of you feel the same way as he does, come and get your pay and get off this ranch! Jarrod was, is and always will be a Barkley! I don't care what name he goes by, how he chooses to dress, or what language he speaks! Now, with that said and done, stop and think! That boy will need to feel loved and accepted by his own kind, if he is to successfully make the adjustment back into our world, the world he never should have been taken from! It's going to be hard enough for him to make the adjustment with the way others will be treating him; he sure doesn't need it from any of us! Do you understand?" McCall bellowed and glared at the men who now looked greatly ashamed of themselves for even listening to Mr. Hansen's ugly, hurtful comments._

_ As young as he was, Nick too felt ashamed for saying the things he'd said to his mother as he watched Hansen get up and walk off while the other men went, quietly, back to work. "McCall?" Nick walked up to his friend once all the men had left. _

_ McCall looked down at Nick and sighed. He could see the child had been crying and now he'd watched him, McCall, lay into the men. He could only imagine what the lad was thinking. McCall reached down and lifted Nick up onto the top of the nearby fence and then leaned against it himself. "What do you want?" he asked and then waited for Nick to talk._

_ "I want my brother back, only I'm scared. It don't sound like my brother that my father is bringin' back. It sounds like a stranger." That was the part that was really upsetting him; he was supposed to know his brother and the young man his mother had described didn't sound like him." What if he doesn't know me, what if he doesn't like me, what if I don't like him?" Nick suddenly dropped his head in shame for voicing his fears, knowing they didn't sound fair and right, but feeling them just the same. _

_ McCall didn't say anything for a moment. How was he supposed to explain that, in some ways, that's exactly what Jarrod would be for awhile? A stranger trying to fit back in and, even when he was no longer a stranger, he would never be the same as he was before. McCall rubbed the back of his neck as he slowly answered, "He's still your brother, Nick, and he needs you now more than ever. Things won't be the same, but that don't mean they won't be good. Though," McCall said as he laid his hand upon Nick's shoulder, "you know where to find me if things get to feeling like a bit too much for you."_

_ Nick's face lit up as he threw his arms around the man's neck and gave him the biggest hug he could. "Thanks, I guess I better go apologize to mother for the things I said." McCall might have asked what he'd said to Victoria, but Nick was already off the fence and half way back to the house._


	27. Jarrod tells the rest

**Man of Justice**

**A/N Not surprisingly, Jarrod has insisted on 'taking the reins' per say.**

**Chapter Twenty-Seven**

Nick and Heath found themselves back in the living room much to Nick's dismay. He'd just been getting ready to tell Heath about Jarrod's return to the ranch when their older brother had sent Audra out to ask them to please come inside. Out of respect for Jarrod, the men had complied, though Nick stood as far away from Jacob Michael as he possibly could…with his arms folded tightly across his chest as a form of personal restraint. Nick dared not drop his arms, for fear he may strangle the man right there in front of his family. Heath sat on the chair nearest the living room entrance. After what Nick had told him, he had no desire to be too close to their visitor either.

"I assume you have told Heath what happened?" Jarrod looked at Nick with, with a bittersweet tone in his voice and a look of weariness in his eyes. It tore once again into Nick's soul.

"Yeah, I told him. That is, up to that trip through Chico you told me about." Nick answered bluntly but did not bark, as he didn't want to upset Jarrod any more than what he seemed to be. "Now, why was it so necessary for you to ask us to come back in here?" he demanded, as he glared yet again at their guest.

Jarrod's voice grew firm and both his brothers could hear "that tone" in their Pappy's voice. "Let's just say I just decided it didn't make sense for the same story to be told in two different spots. And yes, we've been discussing the consequences of Mr. Michael's actions in here too…not just his prison time either." Jarrod then turned his attention to Jacob Michael. "When you say the adjustment I and my family had to go through when I got back must have been hard, you are making the understatement of the century! It was more than hard, it was… excuse my language ladies," he looked at his mother, Mrs. Michael and Audra, all whom simply nodded as if to tell him that under the circumstances they understood. "It was hell."

_Jarrod rode in between Jim and Tom. Tom and Jim stuck to traveling through the hills rather than going onto any main roads, not because they were ashamed to be seen with Jarrod "the way he was", but simply out of consideration for Jarrod's feelings. They'd already had a number of encounters with people that thought the same as Mrs. Williams. Thank goodness, they'd met a number of people who didn't as well. If they hadn't, Tom was sure Jarrod would have turned his horse around and gone back to the Shoshone and to his Shoshone father. _

_ Birds flew through the air and a few wild animals could be seen making their way through the area the men were riding through. After Jarrod's one word apology, he had said nothing more, though Tom and Jim had both talked about the family and the ranch. When the ranch came into view, Tom was not surprised to see Jarrod stop his horse. He watched as his son's eyes moved from one side to the other taking it all in._

_ Jarrod felt everything for anger to excitement to trepidation running through him. Memories he'd forced to the back of his mind, out of the necessity to cope with adjusting to his Shoshone home, came rushing to the front of his mind, some that should have caused his heart to jump for joy only it was too full of pain and confusion to do such a thing. For whatever reason, the memories had his heart pounding eighty miles an hour and Jarrod came close to turning his horse around. How close he came to riding back to Straight Arrow and the other Shoshone people was something it would take years for Jarrod to admit. Even then it would only be to Nick and his mother as it wasn't until after his father had been gone for close to six months that he could get himself to even acknowledge that fact. The sight of their new home was also overwhelming. _

_ They sat on their horses, in the same place, for a solid thirty minutes before Tom realized his son wasn't just taking things in. Jarrod was also unable to get himself to move forward. Tom sighed yet again and nudged his son's horse to start moving. Tom then led the way down the hill and towards the home he'd told Jarrod about a number of times on the way back. Because Jarrod was still not speaking, Tom was confused. He couldn't understand how Jarrod could so easily forget. He wondered if the Shoshone had tortured his boy; wondered if his fight to survive the terrors had actually transformed Jarrod into a Shoshone. But in truth, he could not believe that. He'd seen the look of love and admiration on Straight Arrows face and seen it in Jarrod's as he looked upon the man. Tom also silently reveled in the name the tribe had given his son "Man of Justice". It was a name marked with honor. For now Tom had to be a man of patience, if he were to help his son._

_ Victoria was standing in the front yard holding Eugene and talking to McCall and Nick, Audra played near her feet while some of the ranch hands stood nearby when the trio could be seen approaching their home. The moment Nick saw who was coming he hid behind McCall. The sight of Jarrod with his long hair and buckskin clothes proved to be a bit overwhelming for the young child. McCall said nothing though, he simply reached back and pulled his young shadow around to his side and held onto him. That small gesture was something that Nick not only found comfort in at the time, but would cherish forever._

_ Victoria held back the tears she so wanted to shed, as she looked upon the son she barely recognized. He'd shot up to the height of a man and the long hair had changed his looks quite a bit; still, she would have recognized him as her son, even in a crowd of thousands. While some of the men standing nearby would say later all they saw was defiance in Jarrod's eyes, she, like Tom and Jim, saw the pain, hurt and fear. "Welcome home, Tom." She smiled at Jarrod when her husband stopped the horse. "Welcome home, Man of Justice." She, like her husband, had to stop, think and make herself say the name given to her son. At least, it was an honorable name. She was grateful for that._

_ "McCall," Tom said as Jim and Jarrod dismounted their horses, "would you and Jim please take care of these animals?" _

_ "Yes, sir." McCall let go of Nick and, after giving the boy a reassuring smile and pat on the back, took the reins to Jim's horse, but not before slipping a nearby rope around the neck of Jarrod's stallion. He then did as his boss requested._

_ Once McCall and Jim had left, the other men drifted off and an awkward silence fell between all the Barkleys; no one quite sure of what to say or do. That is until Nick ran up to Jarrod, wrapped his arms around his waist and cried out, "Welcome home, brother!" Nick had already determined if he couldn't call Jarrod by his white name, he'd simply call him brother for now._

_ Jarrod felt a knot come into his throat and knelt down in front of Nick. During the seven weeks of traveling Tom and Jim had gotten Jarrod used to hearing the English language again, he had yet to say more than his one word apology. Truth was, with the exception of the time at the trading post and next to his horse in front of the boarding house, Jarrod hadn't even spoken Shoshone. It had been one very quiet trip when Tom and Jim hadn't been talking. _

_ Tom and Victoria held their breath as Jarrod knelt down in front of Nick; both prayed their oldest would say something, anything, to his younger brother…even if it was in Shoshone. They were granted their desire when Jarrod, after studying Nick for a few intense moments replied with a small smile, "Tam-ets-y."_

_ Nick might not have understood Jarrod had just called him "younger brother", but he understood the smile and look of longing he saw in Jarrod's eyes. It was those things, the small smile and longing, that took a hold of Nick and had him remembering what McCall had said to him moments before Jarrod, his father and Jim had come into view. __**"Who knows maybe, for a change, it will be you who will need to let your brother lean on you." **__ Nick whispered, "You can lean on me, brother."_

___**TBC **_


	28. Chapter 28

**Man of Justice**

**Chapter Twenty –Eight**

_Tom, who had taken Jarrod from room to room in their new home, talked about everything from how they would now be able to enjoy the fruit of their labors to the fact they would be able to help those less fortunate than themselves. The whole time Tom talked, Nick stayed right next to his older brother. By the time they reached the room Tom and Victoria expected Jarrod to use the young man was growing restless and felt closed in. While Tom was showing him the room and explaining that the room was to be his alone; a place for him to be alone and think if necessary, he did not notice Jarrod's body language and expression. It looked like Jarrod was beginning to get close to the "edge" as it were. Fortunately, Nick saw it. Maybe it was because of all the months Nick had spent "escaping" in one form or another that he recognized it. He didn't really know, but he did know what to do. "Father, can I take brother outside?"_

_ Tom shot Nick a warning glare, not because of the request but because of his consistent refusal to call Jarrod by an actual name. "You may take __**Man of Justice**__ outside IF he wants to go with you." Tom replied. It was all he could do to bite his tongue, as he did not wish to cause a scene in front of his oldest. _

_ Nick turned around, proving that he hadn't picked up the subtle chastisement and correction of his father. "Do you want to go outside, brother?" Nick looked up at Jarrod expectedly, desperately wanting to know he had indeed read Jarrod's mood correctly. _

_ Jarrod might have also been irritated at the boy's refusal to acknowledge his Shoshone name if it weren't for two things. Nick was young; he was just a child and thought as a child. Why should that be offensive? And two, was it really any worse than the fact that he couldn't seem to get himself to speak any English? Jarrod held out his hand and took a hold of Nick's hand. Together the two left the room, walked down the stairs and went outside._

_ Once outside, Nick started pulling Jarrod towards the barn as he talked a mile a minute. Jarrod did his best to listen though he kept finding his mind wandering back to the Shoshone village and to Straight Arrow. He realized he was missing his Shoshone family just like he'd missed his white family when he first went to the Shoshone village. Again, it frustrated him and made it so he had a war going on inside of him. He was brought up short on his thoughts as Nick stopped, pointed to a new baby horse and then looked at him and asked, "How do you say horse in Shoshone?" _

_ Jarrod was taken aback. Nick refused to call him by his Shoshone name, but he was honestly curious as to what the Shoshone would call a horse. Unbeknownst to him or his parents, Nick had gone to McCall and asked him for suggestions on how to get his brother to talk...even if was in the language of the Shoshone. The man had been surprised, but flattered, that Nick would ask him such a thing. After a few moments, the man had smiled and suggested that he think up some type of "game" for the two of them to play and then find a way to get Jarrod to join in. When Nick had seen the closed in look in his brother's eyes and realized Jarrod needed to be outside, the game finally formed in his mind. "Well?" Nick, still looking at Jarrod, asked his question again._

_ Jarrod had seldom smiled since leaving the trading post. He had smiled at Jim though he didn't understand why at the time. Perhaps it was the man's determination and loyalty to his white father, or perhaps there was something in the man's eyes that projected an understanding and a similar experience. He now looked down at the small determined face of his younger brother and smirked as he answered, "Tee-he." Somehow, Jarrod was not surprised when Nick repeated the word and then pointed to a halter and asked him to tell him how to say it._

_ Jarrod could see where this was going and he didn't really want to keep it up, only he didn't want to hurt the child's feelings either. That being the case he answered, "Te-go-re-a-zat-to-nump." It didn't surprise him when Nick looked at him funny and didn't even try to say the word, but he didn't stop pulling Jarrod from one item to the next…including things outside and asking for their names. By the time supper rolled around Nick was getting on the last of Jarrod's nerves. When their mother called, Jarrod was more than happy to go back inside the house if only for the reason that his white mother had a way of getting this brother to be quiet for at least two minutes!_

_ Supper time might have given him a break from listening to Nick's constant questions, but it also forced him to face his family all at once. It might not have been so bad, but Audra, having laid down for a nap while her father showed Jarrod around earlier and not seeing him while Nick was pulling him from one place to another, saw Jarrod only as total stranger. With a fearful expression she practically flew over to and up on to her mother's lap. Before anyone could stop him, Jarrod hurried out of the dining room._

_ Without thinking, Nick snapped at his little sister. "Way to go, Audra! See what you did!" That, of course, earned him a swat and a one way ticket to his bedroom, before Tom went to find Jarrod. _

_ When Tom found him, Jarrod was sitting cross legged in the loft of the barn looking out the opened doors. He had no shirt on. Tom shook his head, though he was grateful that at least his son had the sense to leave the piece of clothing on while he was in his mother's presence. "May I join you?" Tom asked as he finished climbing the ladder and made his way over to his son. Only when Jarrod nodded did Tom join him. _

_ The wind was starting to blow and it blew across the barn's two occupants, as if it was trying to help ease the burdens Tom and Jarrod were both carrying. Tom knew full well it was Audra's reaction to him that had his oldest upset. He also knew it would happen again, until the child got used to Jarrod being around. "Don't let your sister's reaction get to you." Tom looked over at Jarrod. "She does that to anyone she doesn't know and she was far too young when you were taken from us to remember you now."_

_ Jarrod nodded slowly, but said nothing. His head knew what Tom said was true; his head knew the child meant no harm. It shouldn't have bothered him; only problem was…it had. It hurt his heart to see his baby sister react that way.__Tom sat, silent, for a few more moments and then stood up. "Please, be back in the house before dark. It was a request Jarrod honored…though when it came to sleeping, Victoria and Tom would find their oldest lying on his bedroom floor with the window open. It was a sight they were to see for many months._


	29. Chapter 29

**Man of Justice**

**A/N Not surprisingly, Jarrod has insisted on 'taking the reins' per say.**

**Chapter Twenty –Nine**

_The sun felt as if it was reaching down and doing everything it could to break the young man's determination and pace, as he worked on fixing the fence lines. Jarrod wasn't about to let something as simple as a hot sun make him stop. His father had asked him to fix the fences lines and he'd acknowledged the request when he picked up the tools necessary for the job out of the back of the wagon Tom had put there. A man kept his word no matter what, and as far as Jarrod was concerned he was still a man._

_ When he felt someone looking at him, Jarrod whirled around. It was Carl Adams, a nineteen year old man who had recently been hired. Jarrod suppressed the frown of distrust he had for this employee; he was constantly watching Jarrod and talking under his breath. Though, Jarrod noticed the man didn't act that way when his father, McCall or Nick were around. That the last part put a smile in his heart; for even at his young age Nick was proving to be a handful for the men as well as his parents. Well, that is, for everyone but McCall. That man seemed to know where Nick's reins were._

_ "Well, well," Carl started towards Jarrod, "If it ain't the Barkley's Injun, from the looks of it, you should have stayed with those heathens you were with." The man pushed over the pole Jarrod had just positioned in the hole he'd finished digging. "You can't even set a pole right." The man started laughing. A fight would have broken out only, to Carl's horror, he felt McCall's hand on the back of his neck. He'd been so intent on harassing Jarrod that he hadn't heard the foreman approaching from behind him._

_ McCall turned Carl around quite forcefully and barked, "What are you doin' here, besides causing problems? When I hired you I told you how things were and told you what was expected of you!" McCall turned and looked at Jarrod whose face was, as always, unreadable. "Has he bothered you before?" He hated the idea that might be the case; however, if that was the case, he would let this man go._

_ "I can't afford to let a 'man' like that bother me' Jarrod thought, but since this was the first time the Mr. Adams had actually caused him any problem, Jarrod simply shook his head and went back to work._

_ "Consider this your one and only warning!" McCall pulled the man up almost to his face and barked, "Bother Man of Justice again and you will be fired! Do you understand?" McCall asked, as he pushed Carl backwards before letting go. "That is, unless you wish to collect your pay and get off this ranch now!" _

_ Carl had as sick mother to take care of and he knew he couldn't really risk losing job. "I'll keep my distance." He glared before he turned around and walked away. _

_ McCall had other things to do but didn't want to chance anyone else harassing Jarrod either. He grabbed some tools and went to work alongside Jarrod. It was a simple gesture, but Jarrod rewarded him with one of his rare small smiles. The rest of the afternoon the two worked side by side, McCall keeping an eye on Jarrod and Jarrod rewarding him by showing he was still one very capable and hard working young man. As soon as their work was finished, Jarrod headed for the barn and McCall went to check on the men._

_ "Brother!" Nick yelled as he climbed up the loft, sat down at the edge of the loft and allowed his feet to hang down against the side of the barn, "Can I ask you something?" _

_ Jarrod turned and looked at Nick and nodded, as he'd gotten used to the way Nick was his constant shadow especially when he was following Tom or McCall around the ranch. _

_ "Do you like it here?" Nick kept his eyes on Jarrod's face in order to see his reaction. McCall had told him that you could tell a lot about another person by looking at their face and, in spite of the fact others could not read Jarrod's face, Nick seemed to do it without a problem._

_ Did he like it here? Jarrod mused. He turned his head back to the scenery and looked around. He'd recognized the ranch the moment he'd ridden onto the land; it felt right, but this house before his eyes? It was a different story. He felt like a fish out of water in it. It was so huge and had so many rooms. Jarrod turned his eyes back towards his brother. Since coming home the boy had dragged him from one corner of the ranch to the other, said he was reintroducing Jarrod to all his friends. That part had made him smile as they'd been standing by a small pond and Nick was holding up a frog he'd named Pete when he made the statement. For the thousandth time, Jarrod tried to make himself verbally answer his brother and for the thousandth time failed. Slowly he nodded his head. _

_ "Then why do you act so sad? Why won't you talk? Mother and Father say there's no reason for you not to, they say you weren't gone long enough to forget. I hear McCall say that, if anything, you should only be rusty and maybe have a hard time finding the words, but… you should be able to find them." Then he shocked Jarrod by asking, "It's not me, is it? You're not mad at me are you?"_

_ Jarrod's eyes widened and he began shaking his head violently, pulling his brother in close. Maybe it was Nick's child like manner when he asked the question, or the guilt Jarrod felt for not being able to get words to come, that in all honesty, should be coming without a problem by now. He didn't really know, but after months of either silence or Shoshone words, Jarrod whispered one small English word. "No."_


	30. Some People's Attitudes

**Man of Justice **

**Chapter Thirty **

_ Jarrod rode his horse through town with McCall by his side. Tom had sent McCall into town to get supplies. The foreman was happy for the break and asked if he could take Jarrod along. He hoped he could reacquaint his boss' son to the place where Jarrod had been born. Now, McCall stood on the side of the street wondering if it had been such a smart idea, when as a bucket full of water fell from the roof. The bucket narrowly missed Jarrod, but the water didn't._

_ "Oh I'm sorry!" Lyman hurried down the ladder, stepped inside and grabbed a towel; actually, more like a rag and handed it to Jarrod. "I bumped into the bucket by accident and it fell before I could grab it!"_

_ Jarrod doubted the story as the man might have been offering an apology with his words, but his eyes were fighting laughter._

_ It didn't sit right with McCall either. "That was no accident! There's no reason to harass him; he hasn't done anything to you!" _

_ Lyman simply restated his rather poor apology and quickly disappeared into the building, when it looked like McCall was going to haul off and punch him!_

_ "Well, come on." McCall shook his head. "We'll have to get you a new shirt; that one is soaked." He was surprised, but not shocked, when Jarrod shook his head. "Don't worry," explained McCall, "I know where we can get another buckskin shirt." McCall led him in the directions of a nearby store where a friend of his worked. Unfortunely, before they reached the store a couple of men walked around the corner. _

_ Their turned down noses and smirks spoke louder than they did. "Well, well, the Barkley's papoose has found his way home! Looks like you're still part injun to me, boy. What did they do? Put their blood into you?" The heavier set one, though he wasn't all that big, poked Jarrod in the shoulder only to find McCall's fist in his stomach and gasping for breath. The other man went for Jarrod only to be shocked when Jarrod grabbed his arm and threw him over his shoulder. _

_ About that time, McCall's friend hurried out of his store."Leave them be!" Robert Taylor barked at the men harassing his friend and the Barkley's oldest son. The men might not have listened, but there was something in Jarrod's eyes as he glared at them that scared them right out of their slimy shells. It was as if he was begging them to fight him. That being the case, the two men slithered away as fast as they could._

_ "Come on in," Robert said as he waved for them to follow him, "I will take it that you at least need something for the lad to wear. I mean, for something to replace that wet shirt." Truth was, Robert had seen the water incident and was prepared._

_ "As long as they're buckskin, we do." McCall answered as they entered the man's store. _

_ Robert didn't understand, but he didn't argue either. "Hang the shirt in my back room and try this on." He reached up to the top shelf and pulled down a simple brown buckskin shirt. "There you go." He handed Jarrod the shirt, but refused the money McCall offered him._

_ "I haven't seen him in town before, but I've heard plenty." Robert said as Jarrod stepped into the back and made the exchange. It wasn't long before Jarrod and McCall were again going about their business. Both were relieved when the most they got were stares and whispers during the rest of their time in town._

_**0000**_

_ Tom and Victoria were sitting in the front room talking while Audra and Eugene had both been laid down for an afternoon nap. When McCall and Jarrod walked through the door, the fact something had happened in town to upset their son was as clear as the cloudless sky. Jarrod's face which had begun softening up over the last week was again back to being completely unreadable. _

_ Wanting to find out what happened without upsetting his son, Tom stood up and looked at Jarrod. "Nick is in the stable doing what he can to clean the stalls. Please, go help him, son." He had to inwardly shake his head as Jarrod only nodded and then turned around and left the house. Once he was gone, Tom demanded an explanation._

_ McCall replayed the incident and then added, "Maybe, I shouldn't have taken him, only…" he paused as he glanced towards the door and then continued, "he can't hide here on the ranch the rest of his life. But, as long as he continues to choose to act and dress that way, he's going to have problems."_

_ As much as it hurt to hear McCall say it, they both knew it to be true. Tom dismissed McCall and then turned around to face his wife. It upset him to see the tears in her eyes; the ones which wanted to come but hadn't succeeded in coming yet. "I don't know how much more of this I can take. He's been home for months now! He should be talking English, not just Shoshone to his horse or one of the other animals. He shouldn't still be acting as if he is Shoshone!" the frustration and anger Tom felt spilled out in his voice._

_ Victoria understood her husband frustration and anger, but being around their children more, her level of frustration and anger was not as deep. "He's making progress, Tom. Nick is constantly by his side as they work together and, while it's in the Shoshone language, the two boys are starting to communicate. Who knows, maybe once Nick has learned the language he will succeed in finding out why Jarrod is being so stubborn about all of this. I mean, about his clothes, the language and his name. I mean, no one forced him to come ba..." she cut off her words and Tom stiffened slightly. "Tom, he did choose to come back, didn't he?" She was horrified to think her own son might not want to be with them at all._

_ "Yes, he chose to come on his own, though I admit," Tom sighed, "I talked hard to convince him to come back." The two fell into silence as Tom's heart broke as he realized he only had two choices he could really make...get some sort of help for Jarrod or take him back to his Shoshone father. _


	31. Getting Help

**Man of Justice**

**Chapter Thirty-One**

_Whispers and rumblings could be heard as Tom drove his wagon through the streets of Stockton with Jarrod by his side. Tom wasn't surprised though he hoped the "good" people of Stockton would keep their "accidents" to a dull roar for awhile at least. In between his work obligation, helping Victoria as much as he could and doing his best to be patience with his boys….Nick for his consistent refusal to call Jarrod anything but brother and Jarrod for his consistent refusal to speak English; well, not much anyway. He had started at least saying "Thank you" to his mother for the food she cooked, though the burden of fixing meals would be eased once their new butler, Silas, started working._

_ Understandably, Victoria was being taxed to the limit with the new baby and doing her best to help their oldest feel at home once more, not exactly easy when the boy continued to insist on sleeping on his floor with the window open or even sneaking out of the house and sleeping on the front yard lawn. Jarrod should be used to walls around him by now. When the new sheriff, Fred Madden, stepped out of his office as Tom drew near, Tom stopped the wagon. "Hello, Fred, how are things going?"_

_ Fred was a very good man and tolerant of many people, smiled at Tom and at Jarrod. He held out his hand and took a hold of the one Tom had held out as he greeted the lawman. "I'm doing great. I've been out of town for a spell and haven't met Jarrod yet. So this is this your oldest boy, the one I've been hearing about?" He, very politely, left out just some of the things he'd heard. After all, Jarrod's story was not so unusual in these times and places out west. But most people either stuck their heads in the sand or stuck their nose up in the air; Fred was well aware that most people just didn't want it in their faces, or to be reminded of it. _

_ But Tom Barkley didn't care about the ignorant masses; he just concerned himself with getting his boy the help he needed."Yes, this is Jarrod, but he prefers his Shoshone name, Man of Justice." Tom replied as he looked at Jarrod. He was relieved to see the young man at least looking at the sheriff without an expression full of ice. Maybe, all that talking Nick had insisted on doing when he found out his father was taking Jarrod into town had done some good after all._

_ Fred started smiling from ear to ear as h he held out his hand to Jarrod, "Good to finally meet you Man of Justice. If you're anything like that name of yours, we should get along fine. I'm sure we have a lot in common."_

_ Tom was pleasantly surprised and shocked when Jarrod actually reached out and took the hand that was offered to him; though he said not a word he was also smiling. It was still a small smile, but at least those, small smiles that is, were starting to come more often. "Well, Fred, we have to get going. Have a good day." Tom lifted up the reins as Fred stepped back._

_ "You too." Fred watched as his friend drove his wagon down to the doctor's office and stopped in front of it. While he didn't know the reason for the medical visit, the lawman did pray for the best when it came to the Barkleys. He liked them._

_ Dr. Merar was just coming into the waiting area of his office when Tom and Jarrod entered. Because Tom had already talked to the good doctor the week before, the man didn't have to ask what he could do for them. "Hello Tom, good to see you home J…I mean Man of Justice. Forgive me," his warm and genuine greeting reached out and helped calm Jarrod's troubled nerves; and he had been troubled ever since he'd heard McCall doing his best to reassure Nick there was nothing physically wrong with his older brother that he was very healthy. If his father knew he was well, why was he being brought to this man?_

_ "If you don't mind Tom, I have someone who wants to meet Man of Justice while you and I talk privately." Dr. Merar wasn't surprised when both Tom and Jarrod stiffened. He had expected such a reaction. "Come with me, both of you can meet him." He led them down a small hallway lined with various documentations hanging on the wall and into a side room._

_ When their visitor stood up and turned around, he'd been facing the window with his back to them, shock waves ran through both of the Barkleys. Though his skin was white, the man's high cheek bones and other physical traits said he was partially of Indian descent. "This is James Goodman; he's a friend of mine from back east. He's…" Dr. Merar hesitated not wanting to offend Tom or give Jarrod what he might see as just cause to run and then finished, "another kind of doctor." _

_ It was a good thing Jarrod was too enthralled at seeing someone who at least had Indian blood in him to notice how much Tom stiffened up at Dr. Merar words. "Tom, please, you said you wanted to help your son. Dr. Goodman is …." Dr. Merar chuckled at the irony of what he was about to say and the man's last name, "a very good man." _

_ Tom found himself chuckling as he turned and followed Dr. Merar out of the room, but not before reassuring his son he would not leave the building without him. Once they were back in the waiting room, Tom asked as he sat down in a chair to wait for his son, "Was it really necessary to send for this Dr. Goodman?" He knew what kind of Doctor this Goodman fellow was. He immediately imagined mental institutions and his son most definitely did not belong in one of those._

_ "I'm not saying Jarrod is crazy, Tom, if that's what you're thinking, but let's face it. It doesn't matter if he was to start speaking and tell us he had the best possible experience in that village. Fact remains, he should be speaking English and he's not. He should also be talking more and his not. That spells major emotional trauma to me. I figured with Dr. Goodman's grandfather being Indian, it would help Jarrod relax and feel comfortable. I especially sought out this doctor. I really believe he has the best chance of getting through to Jarrod." Dr. Merar didn't think he would get an argument from Tom. He didn't._

When Jarrod fell in silence Nick spoke up, "I remember that. Dr. Goodman wound up coming out and living with us for a few months, until you started talking again." Then realizing that, even with all the talks he and Jarrod had had, there were a number of times Jarrod had refused to answer questions Nick still had. Seeing an opportunity to get yet another question answered, Nick asked, while shooting Jacob Michael another glare which Jacob took in stride. After all, Jacob figured he could be getting worse things than a glare from Nick, "I always got the feeling he left under protest. Did he?"

Jarrod turned his head and stared into the empty fireplace. For a few seconds an uneasy air encompassed the room until Jarrod sighed and nodded, "I walked into the study and told father I'd speak English with other people if he did two things, not fight me speaking to my horse in Shoshone as I did not wish to lose the ability to speak the language and two, Dr. Goodman had to go or I would go back to speaking only Shoshone and never speak another word of English to anybody."

"Was he that bad?" Heath was afraid the man had done something horribly wrong for such a request to be made; it was an assumption they had all made.

Jarrod shook his head as he turned his head to look at his family and their guests, "He never laid a hand on me if that's what you're thinking. I…" he paused as he rubbed the palms of his hands together, unable to hide a fleeting look of lingering pain out of his eyes, "It's just that, as nice as he was in some ways, he kept hinting that the Shoshone had been cruel to me. He even went so far as to suggest my Shoshone father never really cared about me and was only thinking about himself when he accepted me. " Fire appeared in Jarrod's eyes, a fire so strong it shook them all to the core. "I will give him the trauma of being taken from my family by the Modoc and given to a Shoshone man was a nightmare, adjusting to their way of life was extremely difficult for me some days, but Straight Arrow was nothing like the man Dr. Goodman was trying to make him out to be nor were the majority of the village! Straight Arrow did the best he could by me while I was with them and would have welcomed me back with open arms if I had gone back!" Jarrod took a deep breath before continuing. "At the time, I figured if the only way to get rid of him was to start speaking English again, so be it. Besides, he was right on one thing," Jarrod smiled and winked at them, "If I didn't speak the language of the people around me… I was going to be very much alone."

Audra, now curious as ever, asked, "When did you stop wearing your Indian clothes and cut your hair." She kept an eye on Jarrod who had fallen back into silence.

Victoria, seeing an extremely tired look upon Jarrod's face, feared Jarrod was being pushed too hard. Also, noticing the time she spoke up, "Let's continue this conversation later, maybe even tomorrow. Silas should have supper ready soon. You," she looked at the Michael's, "can sleep in the guest room for tonight." She stressed the words 'for tonight' and shot Nick a stern glare. Legally the ranch might be his, but for the sake of her oldest ghosts needed to be laid to rest. There was obviously still much healing to be done. Those ghosts would not go away, nor would the healing take place, if the Michaels were made to leave 'at this point. Nick's only answer was to keep his tongue in check, ball up his fists, turn around and leave the house.


	32. Fight

**Man of Justice**

**Chapter Thirty two **

Morning came early and it found the Barkleys and their guests sitting on chairs set out on the front lawn or leaning up against one of the trees. Jarrod stood some fee away, leaning his shoulder against one of the trees while he looked at his family and the Michaels. While all wanted to press Jarrod to talk, no one did. Truth be told, had the Barkleys known Jarrod had slipped out of the house around midnight, climbed up to the loft of the barn, and once more sat cross legged and shirtless in front of the opened doors of the loft, and that it was a routine he'd consistently been doing for years when he was being pushed to his limit…each and every one of the Barkleys would have asked their guests to leave. If they Barkleys had asked them to leave, the Michaels would have gone away disappointed but without a fight. As it was, Jarrod finally broke the silence as he started talking.

_ After Doctor Goodman left, Jarrod kept his promise and spoke more often, though most of it was related to either questions or answers. He even shocked them the day that Nick wanted to see one of his friends in town and he had offered to be the one to be the one to take him._

_ Jarrod now walked down the streets of Stockton with Nick, looking calm and collected as could be. Looks can be deceiving though. Under his calm exterior, was anger and resentment. Tom had been talking to Nick and him at the breakfast table. "I need you boys ready to go by nine tomorrow morning. It's going to take all the men we have plus the two of you to move that cattle because we're short of help." _

_ It had been all Jarrod could do to remain in his seat when Tom referred to him as a boy. If he hadn't reminded himself that a man did not show disrespect to a father who, in his eyes, was doing his best by his family, he would have stormed out of the dining room. As it was, he got enough attention as he stiffened slightly and his face, which had been relaxed and actually wore a smile, turned back to the stone mask. "Is there a problem, son?" Tom put down his fork and looked at Jarrod._

_ "No, sir," Jarrod answered as he went back to eating, "You don't have to worry. I'll get my work done; I always get it done." _

_ Not knowing what their son was son thinking, Tom and Victoria could only wonder if Jarrod had simply took offense at what he saw as an implied accusation that he was lazy or if it went deeper than that. Though, they felt there was nothing more they could do for Jarrod other than what they were already doing. All they could do was watch, helpless, as this still very troubled young man fell back into silence during the rest of the meal. Only when he asked to be excused did Jarrod speak again and even then he kept it short._

_ Later Jarrod learned that Nick had turned to their parents had asked, "What's wrong with Man of Justice?" the young boy had finally given in and started to call his brother by his Shoshone name, but not before he let it be known loud and clear what he thought about it…even if it had earned him another trip to his room. "He's been back for almost six months now and he's still not acting like the Jarrod I remember."_

Jarrod smiled upon Victoria as she, unsuccessfully, fought to keep a single tear from rolling down her cheek. "They never got that Jarrod back, he had left never to come back. I couldn't be the rancher father needed," Jarrod's eyes turned to his hot tempered brother who, again, was looking very unsettled, "that job fell to the son it was meant for from the beginning."

"But your hair and your clothing, when did you change them?" Audra pressed for answers. "I mean, as I think hard on it, I remember a boy with long hair and buckskin clothes, but I couldn't have been more than four, maybe five at the most." If she was to continue to tolerate the presence of their guests, she had wanted her questions answered.

Jarrod's eyes grew dark for a moment. Audra instantly wondered if she should have just left things alone. It was too late though; the question had been asked and could not be taken back. "Like I said, I might have looked calm as collected as I walked through Stockton with Nick, only I wasn't. I was simply a bottle filling up with pressure, sooner or later I just had to explode," continued Jarrod.

_Nick and Jarrod were almost to the hardware store when they heard a commotion up the street. Both hurried to see what was going on. They were shocked to see Herman Lee, a rather unfriendly man, pushing a slower somewhat dim witted Johnny Taylor around. Jarrod felt the fury inside him rising. No man, woman or child should be treated the way Herman was pushing Johnny around. "Leave him alone." Jarrod stepped in front of Johnny. "He can't hurt you."_

_ Herman got his 'kicks' out of picking on Johnny and did it every chance he got. Since it was a pretty slow morning, Herman figured he could get away with it. "Get out of my way boy," Herman sneered, "this is a man sized problem, not one to be dealt by a kid." He reached out to grab a hold of Jarrod. That did it, Jarrod snapped. Maybe, he had to put up with being referred to as a boy by his father, but he didn't have to put it up with it from this man. Before Herman knew it, Jarrod had planted his one fist into his abdomen and the other one across his chin, sending him flying backwards. _

_ Because Herman had only recently moved to Stockton and never bothered getting to know the Barkleys or getting to know anything about them, he made an assumption. "Why you no good half-breed, I'll teach you." He came up swinging only to find Jarrod ducking, grabbing his arm, flipping him up into the air and slamming him back down onto the ground, not hard to do as Herman was as thin as a bean pole and not exactly the tallest man around. The fight might have continued only Nick had ran for Fred. A crowd had started to gather by the time the lawman had arrived._

_ "Hold it!" the lawman stepped in between the two, "What is going on?"_

_ "Mr. Lee started it!" Nick was more than happy to pipe up and tell on the man, "he was pushing Johnny around, Man of Justice told him to stop and then Mr. Lee went after my brother!" Nick grinned, as he looked upon Jarrod with a new found admiration._

_ Mr. Lee growled, "I was just going to move him out of the way! This was between Johnny and me! The boy didn't need to get involved!" Again Jarrod snapped and made a move to go after the man only to have Fred stop him and held tight as he turned with authority to Lee._

_ "Leave Jonny alone, Herman. He's more of a man then you'll ever be! Now get out of here before I arrest you for disturbing the peace!" Fred warned and then ordered those who had gathered to disperse. Once the streets had cleared, the lawman looked at both Barkleys boys and started asking questions. Nick was more than happy to answer them, Jarrod was another story. All he would say was that it was wrong for Mr. Lee to be picking on Johnny when the man was in no way capable of defending himself._

_ Because Nick had told Fred exactly what Herman Lee had said and Fred knew how the Shoshone people were given their names, the lawman was able to see the other half of the problem right away. In fact, the way everyone continued to treat Jarrod like a boy amazed the sheriff. If wondered why Dr. Goodman hadn't even picked up on it, which was shocking, as the man would have better cause than anyone to know the Indian culture. He knew a trip out to the Barkley ranch was necessary. "Get what you need and I'll take you back to your home." Fred stepped out of the way leaving Jarrod thinking for sure he'd just gotten into trouble for fighting, though Jarrod swore up and down, no matter what, he'd never apologize for it._


	33. My Name is Jarrod Barkley

**Man of Justice**

**Chapter Thirty three **

_Fred had meant to take Jarrod and Nick back to the ranch himself, but one thing after another happened and he'd had to send them home by themselves. Now, he stood in the Barkley's living room looking rather uncomfortable. Tom and Victoria, who had been told by Nick what happened before Jarrod even had a chance to say a word, wondered if the fight the day before was the reason for the friend's visit now. Their concerns grew when Fred started speaking._

_ "I came to talk to you about your oldest." Fred took his hat off and turned it around in his hands trying to find the right way to start, finally he put his hands on his hips and asked, "Do you know about the incident in town yesterday?" He looked from Tom to Victoria, who was sitting on a chair holding her infant son in her arms while Audra was taking her afternoon nap and then back to Tom, who was standing against the fireplace. _

_ Tom nodded. "They told us. Well, Nick told us and Man of Justice didn't deny it. Though, I can't see why you're here because of that. It seems like my son was in the right. The fact that Jarrod stood up for someone, who could not defend themselves, makes me proud."_

_ "He was in the right; that's why I'm here." Fred's statement confused them, something they didn't try to hide. _

_ "I don't understand." Tom's head tilted slightly while Victoria's face showed her own confusion._

_ Fred wasn't one to "overstep his bounds" when it came to other people's children, but he figured if Jarrod was ever going to make any real progress, he needed to speak his this time. "Tom, I've heard you say more than once you wish the day would come that your oldest would go back to using his own name, dress in white clothes and cut his hair. I have to say I don't think that day will come __**unless…**__" he paused as he saw both of his friends stiffen, "you stop treating him like the boy you lost. He's not a boy anymore. Yes, he's young, but whatever happened in that Shoshone camp not only changed him but gave him the status of a man as well." He again paused, waiting for his words to register. When he saw the understanding in both of the Barkleys' eyes, he then continued, "I took the liberty of talking to McCall before coming to the house." At this point, Fred made sure he was looking straight at Tom, "Have you taken the time to notice Man of Justice is doing the work you ask him to the best of his ability, but that his heart's not in it?" _

_ Victoria and Tom looked each other, both were more than shook up. Fred was telling them the truth and asking them a legitimate question.__Why hadn't they seen that? "No, I haven't. I…I just sent him out to do what he'd always done and he did it. I figured…" he rubbed his forehead while kicking himself mentally for not noticing. "…I told myself I had my first cowboy back; my heir apparent, so to speak."_

_ "Apparently not," quipped Victoria, now more than ever very interested in what Fed had to say, whether he minced words or not, a light of hope warmed her heart. _

_Fred was now more determined to state his observations. "Do you realize how many times your oldest son has been in my office asking questions concerning the law? Do you realize how many times you've been in town and Man of Justice has come into my office to visit the prisoners and hear their stories?" He then lowered his voice…to reassure himself neither Silas nor the housekeeper, Anna, would over hear him. "Do you realize how many times the information I've turned over to the prosecuting attorney, or the defense attorney, has come to me through your son?" Fred wasn't surprised to see the look of two people in utter disbelief come upon Tom and Victoria's faces._

_ "I just thought he was taking a lot of time getting re-acquainted with Stockton." Tom spoke so quietly as he sat down in a nearby chair that Fred almost didn't hear him. He felt bad for the Barkleys. He knew what dreams they'd had for their oldest, especially Tom….dreams Jarrod had also had for himself at one time. Time and events had changed those dreams though, and the sooner his friends could accept that the better off everyone, including Jarrod, would be._

_ "Talk to him Tom, better yet listen to him. Show him you can accept that, in spite of his young age, life turned him into a man…even if it was sooner than either one of you would have liked. Do that and I will bet my bottom dollar he'll change his name, clothes and cut that hair of his; well, at least change his clothes and cut his hair anyway." Fred then excused himself, saying he had to get back to town and take care of some more business._

_ Silence filled the room as Tom and Victoria were left to deal with the truth Fred had handed them. Jarrod wasn't the same, he never would be again and Tom would have to look to Nick when it came time to train someone take over the ranch… when that day came. It was a bitter pill to swallow, but a necessary one. Finally Tom broke the silence as he stood up and headed for the door. "I'm going to go find our son." _

_ Victoria smiled and the light in her heart grew bigger. She looked at the infant on her lap that constantly played with her lace collar. "I wonder little man, what you will become."_

_ Finding Jarrod was easy enough, he was helping McCall with one of the horses. While he worked Tom took the time to stand back and really look at his son. He was saddened to see McCall and Fred were right. Jarrod was indeed going through the motions, even throwing McCall a small smile once in awhile, but the ache in his eyes screamed of someone whose heart was elsewhere. Finally, Tom got his own courage up and spoke. "Can you get someone else to help you, McCall? I need to talk to my son."_

_ Because Fred had talked to him, McCall figured he knew what was going on. "Yes, I can, Tom. Thanks for your help." He looked at Jarrod as he headed for his father._

_ "You're welcome." Jarrod climbed over the corral fence and followed his father as he walked down a nearby path that led into an open field. He couldn't help but wonder what was up. Had he done something wrong? When they came to a couple of very small boulders, Tom sat on one while Jarrod sat on the other one._

_ "What did I do?" Jarrod kept his eyes straight as he asked the question. _

_ Tom realized that his son did that a lot of the time, looked away from him while he was talking to him. He also realized it was only when they were talking about the ranch or some problem Jarrod was having that it happened. "Fred came by a little while ago."_

_ So he was right, thought Jarrod. He was in trouble for fighting. He sat up straight and made sure his shoulders were straight. He would not apologize when he was in the right. _

_Because he assumed things and reacted the way he did, Jarrod was caught off guard when Tom continued. "He says you've got a knack for finding out the truth." Tom took a deep breath and forced himself to continue. "Whether or not either one of us likes it, the dreams you had as a boy have changed. What dreams does the man you have become now have?"_

_ Jarrod whirled around, shocked to hear his father acknowledge him as a man. For a moment he could not speak. Finally, he took a deep breath and answered, "I was given my name for a couple of reasons; one of the reasons was because I always looked for the truth and brought it, the truth, to light. I want to fight for the truth here as well…I want to become a lawyer and fight in the courts like I have see Mr. Hillman and Mr. Murdock do." Kyle Hillman was Stockton's current prosecuting attorney and Lynn Murdock was the current defense attorney. Both were extremely good at their professions and well respected in the town. _

_ Tom slowly nodded. "Okay, guess we need to start looking at college for you, but son…" he paused as he looked Jarrod over. He didn't need to say anything as for the first time since coming home Jarrod started smiling… no beaming._

_ "I'll get new clothes, cut my hair and..." he paused then added, "my name is Jarrod Barkley." Jarrod smiled as he stood up._

_ He didn't flinch this time as Tom stood beside him and placed a firm hand on his shoulder and smiled back at his son. Jarrod Barkley, soon to be attorney at law, and always a man of Justice, was a son he knew he could be proud of. Both walked together in silence back to the house… a good strong bond of silence and pride having been formed, one that would last until the day Tom died. _


	34. Not Over Yet

**Man of Justice**

**Chapter Thirty-Four**

Jacob Michael looked at all the Barkleys once Jarrod quit speaking. How he wished he could turn back the hands of time, but Nick was right he couldn't do that. "I **am **sorry. I wish there was a way to prove it to you and I **do **wish I could make it up to you somehow. Though, I suppose after all these years there isn't. I'm sorry for bringing back painful memories. I'll be leaving…" He started to rise with the intention of leaving, as did his wife only to be stopped by Jarrod. The words the oldest Barkley brother said shocked them all.

"Why did you turn down the chances you had to leave prison early?" Jarrod asked the question quietly but firmly, with a tone that demanded an answer.

Jacob looked at all the Barkleys' who were all staring back at him. It was as if someone had just pushed them out of a darkened room and into the sunlight. It was obvious to Jacob they had no clue to what Jarrod was talking about. "H…How did you know I had chances?" Jacob sat back down by his wife's side.

Jarrod sighed. "I have worked a number of times with the *****parole board. William Thatcher told me how they had offered you an early release five years ago and then again three years ago. He said the parole board couldn't believe you turned them down both times, even said the second time you looked as if you had been insulted; that it was taking all you had to not lose your temper at 'such a suggestion'. Why?" The news had taken Jarrod aback when he'd heard it and he'd been wondering about it ever since, but had never been able to bring himself to go check into the matter.

Jacob shrugged his shoulders as he thought on the two occasions Jarrod was talking about. It had been so tempting at the time to accept the offer to be paroled; a part of him wanted to. After all, he _wasn't _getting any younger. Slowly, he turned his head and looked at Victoria who sat there a little confused by Jarrod's question. "I kept seeing your mother," Jacob's eyes again filled with sincere remorse, the kind that reaches out and grabs a person by the throat so forcefully one would have to be blind not to see it, "standing in that courtroom demanding that justice be served, kept on hearing her demanding to know why I allowed you to be put in a position to be taken by the Modoc. I kept seeing the Widow Jackson in that blasted wheelchair asking everything to 'was the money from the guns really worth it' to 'how come I played favorites'." Jacob shook his head slowly. "I didn't play favorites when Horse Breaker and his men hit the wagon train, but I had no proof of that, not with the way I'd treated everyone before the incident. The courts could only give me prison time for smuggling the guns to the Indians… judge said they couldn't hold me responsible for what the Modoc chose to do nor could the law tell me not to play favorites." Mr. Michael sat up straight as he looked at each and every one of the Barkleys, "They couldn't. However, I knew your family did, as did others, and if the truth be told, I knew it too. After all, out of greed I put your brother in a position to be taken from that wagon, along with endangering the others with the hidden guns. If they were going to knock any time off of the smuggling charges, I figured I could take it back for what it cost your family and the others." Jacob paused, sighed and continued. "As far as I knew, you weren't back in their lives. Though, even if I had known," he looked at them all again, "it wouldn't have made a difference. The penance was still mine to do."

Silence again made itself the room's companion as all the Barkleys took in the news the man _had _made amends the only way he knew how. Jarrod stood up and walked over to Mr. Michael, a weary smile upon his face and extended a hand, "I'd say you've done everything you can. Thank you."

"Please, don't thank me. I came because I wanted to see if there was anything I could do for Tom and Victoria, for the family. I owed you an explanation as lousy as it was, and greed is a lousy excuse. I also owed everyone an apology." Jacob sighed as he looked at Victoria and added. "Out of everyone I have known in this world your parents trusted me the most. I destroyed that and marked my soul for eternity. I just wish there was something…" Jacob's voice trailed off as he put his head down, trying to draw the courage to go on, and suppress the pain that rose from his heart, the pain of shame and self damnation.

Before he could finish his sentence, Jarrod extended his hand once more, an unwavering expression of compassion written on his face. "You have done something for all of us in taking prison time you could have gotten out of. Thank you." he repeated as continued to hold out his hand.

Jacob looked up into the eyes of the boy that had become the man. He stood up and, with a sad smile upon his face, accepted the extended hand. "No, thank you."

Victoria slowly made her way over and gave Rose a hug and shook Jacob's hand...while she knew he was sincere and his remorse real, she wasn't ready to be embracing him just yet. Heath and Audra remained where they were, not wanting to break the mood of healing that seemed to be taking place for at least two of the Barkleys involved. Only when Victoria had stepped aside did Nick speak.

"Was the money worth it?" He asked as he bit off each word of the question. His icy glare bore a hole into the man he still saw as has his enemy.

Jacob looked at Rose; he could see the pain in her eyes, another thing that cut him deep. He turned his gaze back to Nick. "At first, I told myself I had no choice. My son was gravely ill, and I was desperate for money to pay the medical bills. Truth was, I was too full of pride to ask for help. He was my son; I would take care of it." He then shook his head. "By the time he died I had become a creature I have come to loathe." He looked earnestly upon Nick and added. "You're right. I can't turn back the hands of time, though I wish I could."

No one spoke as they looked on Nick, wondering what he'd say next. When he spoke, his volume was not as high as it had been, though the tone was just as firm. "Guess I can work on forgivin' you since you willin', like Jarrod just said, to do more time in prison. However," he stressed the word 'however', "I still would rather you stay off the ranch. Though, if you ever pass through Stockton again I won't argue with the family visiting you there."

Jacob nodded. He knew that the gruff exterior Nick projected was the man's defense against what "still might be". He could also accept this was as much forgiveness as the man was going to give. That was alright. It was more than Jacob himself had expected or even believed he deserved. Deep down he might have wanted to feel he was welcome back on the ranch, but he had to admit that would have been a bit much to ask of anyone. "I can live with that." He offered his hand to Nick, who accepted it… albeit still with some caution.

"I'll walk you to your buggy." Victoria smiled as she led the couple out of the room, grateful that some peace had been made. Audra too excused herself leaving only Jarrod, Nick and Heath in the large room.

Nick would have reminded his brothers they had work to do, but he caught the look that had crept into Jarrod's eyes as he had gone back to staring into the empty fireplace. He was shocked to realize it was the same pain filled look that had been Jarrod's companion through the years, only it had become ten times stronger. He was confused. Mr. Michael _had_ been sincere; they'd all felt it, and Jarrod had thanked him. That being the case, why was there such a deep layer of pain still in Jarrod's eyes? "Jarrod? What's wrong? Things have been laid to rest; you don't need to be haunted by this anymore."

Jarrod closed his eyes and fought to keep the control he'd had through the ordeal of having to relive the past. Why that reaction turned on the light for Heath he would never know, only the Blonde haired cowboy spoke up sending more shock waves through Nick. "There's more, isn't there Jarrod? There's more to this story than anyone's been told."

Nick's jaw clenched with concern as he looked back and forth between his brothers. He couldn't believe that was the case. Sure, Jarrod had kept quiet about certain details for a number of years, but he had finally opened up all told the family everything…hadn't he? "Jarrod?" Nick took a step towards Jarrod only to find his oldest brother turning and fleeing out of the room and out the front door. Nick and Heath looked at each other and then, without a word, hurried to catch up with their older brother.

*Author's note: The adoption of paroling prisoners was actually not put into place until 1893.

.org/discover/10.2307/3053395?uid=3739920&uid=2129&uid=2&uid=70&uid=4&uid=3739256&sid=47698914962257


	35. Talk to Us

**Man of Justice**

**Chapter Thirty-Five **

_Nick took a step towards Jarrod only to find his oldest brother turning and fleeing out of the room and out the front door. Nick and Heath looked at each other and then, without a word, hurried to catch up with their older brother._

**0000**

Nick and Heath raced their horses as fast as they could, following the tracks Jarrod left. Thank goodness the night rain had not washed the tracks away; the morning sun had dried them out and many were still clear. Not only were the two men grateful for the clear tracks, they were also glad they mother had not pressed them to stop and explain everything when they followed Jarrod outside.

_"Nick, stop right there!" Victoria had stepped away from the Michael's buggy greatly alarmed at seeing her oldest bolting out the front door and running towards the stable with Nick and Heath coming out behind him. What on earth was happening now? "What is going on?"_

_ Nick would have told her, as would Heath, except they wanted the Michaels back in Stockton. The couple had to be or their mother might insist on the couple staying and hearing the rest of the story. That was something both knew Jarrod did not want, if he had he would have said something. "It's my fault," Heath yelled over his shoulder, "I'll explain later. Have a safe trip Mr. and Mrs. Michael." _

_ Nick and Heath were almost to the stable when Jarrod rode Jingo through the open doors at full speed. Nick and Heath had moved as fast as they could and were soon on their own horses, doing their best to catch up with Jarrod. Riding over the hills, trees and even crossing a small creek that ran through the ranch, they were amazed at how far ahead of them Jarrod had gotten. It took a half hour for them to even catch a glimpse of him. _

"Wish he'd slow down!" Nick barked as he pushed Coco harder, "Maybe we were premature in sayin' we'd work on forgivin' Jacob Michael!"

Heath didn't know what Jarrod was hiding, but he knew the man Jacob Michael deserved to be forgiven. Though, it didn't really matter at the moment; it was Jarrod who needed their support. "I think we best worry more about catching up with our dear brother and gettin' him to talk!" Heath answered as he too pushed Charger harder. His brother didn't argue with that statement as he also pushed Coco to run faster.

By the time they caught up with Jarrod, their brother was sitting on a medium sized boulder, legs crossed…and his shirt and jacket lay on the ground beside him. His back was towards them. Nick and Heath exchanged worried glances as they stopped their horses and dismounted. They tied the horses to a nearby tree, walked over to and in front of their brother and looked down. Both felt like a bolt of lightning had hit them square in the chest when they saw tears streaming down Jarrod's face.

Nick knelt down and put his hand on Jarrod's left arm while Heath laid his on Jarrod's right shoulder. Both wished they could reach inside of their brother and pull out the pain that was in his soul, even if it meant using up every ounce of strength they had. "What is it, Pappy?" Nick's voice was soft and cracked just a little.

Jarrod's tears fell faster and his shoulders began to shake. Years of holding back, years of running from the most intense pain he'd ever known. The young man he had been had pushed it to the farthest corner of his mind, but the grown man that Jarrod had become could no longer outrun it. As he cried uncontrollably, he found himself grateful Nick and Heath just simply held on instead of asking the question again. He couldn't have answered at the moment if his life depended on it.

Nick and Heath were sure a solid hour must have passed before Jarrod's shoulders stopped shaking and his tears slowed down. When Jarrod took a couple of deep breaths and exhaled, Nick ventured to get the man to talk. "What is it, Jarrod? What haven't you told us?" The pain Nick felt for Jarrod could be seen in his eyes and heard in his voice as he tightened his grip on Jarrod's arm, ever so slightly as to avoid actually hurting the man.

"You can talk us." Heath's concern could also be heard and seen as he kept an eye on Jarrod. He hated seeing anyone so anguished as his normally calm brother was now.

Jarrod turned his head slightly and looked at both his brothers and then rested his gaze on Nick. His breathing was still quite labored, making it hard to talk."I…I'm so..rr…y N..ick. The ma…jor..ity of what I've ever told you is true, re…ally," he took another deep breath as a pain filled gasp could be heard escaping his lips, "but…" he closed his eyes for a moment as he got his breathing under control and then opened them up again, "I lied to you when it came to how I got my name, though the story I told you about Raging River's Friend and Sly Fox is true, along with the majority of the chief's speech. There's other things I've never told anyone, not you, not father not even mother."

While it was a bit unsettling to hear Jarrod had lied to him and not told them of all the details of his ordeal, Nick wasn't about to hold it against his oldest brother. Obviously, what he was hiding was an enormous burden, and it had been eating away at him for years. Maybe, whether or not Nick liked it the Michaels' visit was indeed a blessing. If Jarrod had been hiding something this major, it _had_ to come out or it would eventually destroy him. "So," Nick gave his arm a squeeze and smiled at him, "Tell me the truth now. Get it out of your system. Like Heath said, you can talk to us."

Jarrod nodded. He knew that, he'd always known it…he just hadn't listened to the voice inside of him that had told him to do it. Slowly, painfully, he began talking.


	36. Attack at Snake River

**Man of Justice Chapter Thirty Six **

_Jarrod stood next to Raging River's Friend and his sister, Bright Stars. The three had become good friends and Jarrod credited his two friends for helping him learn the Shoshone language, along with the man he now looked upon as his father. His Shoshone family and friends had left California and traveled many miles to the territory of *Washington and to the *Snake River, as it was their winter quarters. Now, as winter had set in, he and his friends were dressed in their fur pants, shirts and covered with the fur coats the women in the village had made. It also meant that he had gone from living in the more permanent dwellings of the wigwam to living in a teepee. _

_Jarrod blushed from embarrassment as Raging River's Friend smiled at him and said "I'm serious. Our people are looking more and more to you for help in solving their problems and finding the truth to their questions and answers when needed, in spite of your young age. You are very good at digging up the truth." _

_Jarrod knew his friend was referring to the fact that on several occasions since arriving in the village Jarrod had cleared up both misunderstandings and revealed lies told to others. "I hear the chief has been talking to your father about giving you a man's name." _

_"I'm…" Jarrod started to answer his friend when a cry of war was heard through the village. The two friends sprung into action, as most of the men were out hunting._

_They both hurried and made Bright Stars go into Jarrod's and Straight Arrow's home. Jarrod grabbed his two knives, sliding one into a sheath that hung on his side, and then hurried off, but not before calling over his shoulder to his friend, "You stay here and defend your sister and mother!" If Raging River's Friend didn't know his sister and mother, who was inside lying down, had no one else to protect them, he'd have gone with Jarrod. As it was, he stayed where he was._

_Jarrod ran through the village, along with other young men or older men still capable of fighting enough to defend the village. When he saw an arrow flying towards him Jarrod ducked. The arrow barely missed him and embedded itself into one of the poles that belong to the teepee that set off to his right. _

_The brave who had shot the arrow lunged for Jarrod, infuriated that a "mere boy" was interfering with his plans; the man had been heading towards the wigwam with the intentions of having his way with the young woman he'd seen hurry inside. He put his hand on Jarrod, but that was as far as he got when Jarrod planted his knife into the man's chest._

_Jarrod felt sick to his stomach as his attacker fell to the ground, the surprise of death still written on his face. Not a second after he'd fallen, the man was dead. Jarrod had no time to contemplate his revulsion as one of the elderly Shoshone men suddenly fell wounded to the ground. The old man's attacker went to finish him off only to find Jarrod's other knife finding its way into his heart. _

_With no time to retrieve his knives, Jarrod had to fight with whatever he could get his hands on, the whole time wondering when Straight Arrow and the other men would be back. When he heard the chief's_ _daughter scream, Jarrod ran in the direction her scream came from. When he entered the chief's home, he was horrified to see the young woman lying on the ground not moving. Jarrod didn't know if the girl was dead or alive, but what he did know was that one of their enemies was getting ready to make sure she did not survive if she was alive. Jarrod let out a yell as he saw a knife lying nearby; he grabbed it and threw it with all the force he had into the man. The weapon hit its mark with great accuracy and the girl's attacker fell down dead. Jarrod hurried over to check on the young girl. He was relieved to find her breathing. By that time the Shoshone hunters had arrived back and were driving off their enemies, the ones that hadn't been killed. Jarrod and the others in the village had had to kill a number of their enemies that day._

_By the time Jarrod reached the center of the village, he was more than happy to see his father was among the returning warriors, though he didn't know what to think of the expression that encompassed the warriors face. Nor could Jarrod understand why the other men were looking at him in the same way. One would think he had grown ten heads and fifteen eyes. Jarrod grew more nervous as he saw his Shoshone father look at two of their enemies lying on the ground dead, braves that he had killed. What he did not know was that Straight Arrow's aunt had just finished speaking to her nephew and the other men._

_"They were going to kill me. Your son killed them instead." She had looked from the men to her nephew and went on to explain how Jarrod and a few of the other young men had refused to hide while the older men dealt with their attackers. "Not only is that son of yours proving to have thirst for the truth, he pursues justice for those who cannot get it for themselves. You did well the day you accepted him as your son. You should be pleased."_

_Straight Arrow put his hand on Jarrod's shoulder and looked at him with such force; Jarrod prepared himself for the worst. He was shocked when the Chief made his way over to the small group and began to speak._

Jarrod looked at Nick, "That's when the chief made his speech, but he spoke of my willingness to put my life on the line at such a young age to bring justice to their enemies and help defend the village. It was only after winter was drawing close to an end that we headed back for our village near the Feather River here in California." He stopped talking as he felt his stomach churn. Not even fifteen and he'd had to shed blood to save not only his life, but the lives of those he'd grown to care about. How could he have done any different? The Shoshone's enemy had attacked them, not the other way around. Sure, he'd seen young boys having defend their families during the Civil War, but that didn't help his him any.

Nick and Heath also felt sick and hurt for their brother. No wonder he'd come home not talking. "You did what you had to do, Jarrod. It wasn't your fault you had to kill those men at such a young age." Nick did his best to assure Jarrod he understood and did not blame him.

Heath too spoke up, knowing exactly how Jarrod must be feeling for having to take lives at such a tender age. "Don't blame yourself Jarrod, let it go. It's like Nick said you did what you had to."

Jarrod put his hands over his face as more tears fell. He shocked his brothers when he whispered, "That's only the half of what I've been keeping back."

000000

According to Wikipedia, The **Snake** is a major river of the greater Pacific Northwest in the United States. At 1,078 miles (1,735 km) long, it is the largest tributary of the Columbia River, the largest North American river that empties into the Pacific Ocean.[9] Rising in western Wyoming, the river flows through the Snake River Plain then rugged Hells Canyon and the rolling Palouse Hills to reach its mouth at the Tri-Cities of the state of Washington. Its drainage basin encompasses parts of six U.S. states, and its average discharge is over 54,000 cubic feet per second (1,500 m3/s).

**Washington** (i/ˈwɒʃɪŋtən/) is a state in the Pacific Northwest region of the United States located north of Oregon, west of Idaho and south of the Canadian province of British Columbia, on the coast of the Pacific Ocean. Washington was carved out of the western part of Washington Territory which had been ceded by Britain in 1846 by the Oregon Treaty as settlement of the Oregon Boundary Dispute. It was admitted to the Union as the 42nd state in 1889.


	37. Chapter 37

**Man of Justice**

**Chapter Thirty Seven**

** Previously: **_Jarrod put his hands over his face as more tears fell. He shocked his brothers when he whispered, "That's only half of what I've been keeping back."_

The wind had started to blow just hard enough to have the leaves on the nearby trees murmur while the birds flew to their homes. Heath grabbed Jarrod's shirt and jacket, thinking it might be a good idea to get Jarrod to consent to take the conversation elsewhere, but their brother was back to sitting up straight and looking as if he was staring at a scene from the past only he could see. Exchanging glances, he and Nick silently agreed to stay where they were, unless the weather forced them to move. What else could they do? After all, if they moved too soon, Jarrod might not continue the story; having it stopped now was completely unacceptable.

After what seemed like an eternity, Jarrod began speaking. "Almost fifteen," he gave a small humph, "I might as well been fifteen the day of that attack, I had my birthday a week later. Within the month we were back in California and Our Father showed up a few months after that. He always thought that after being gone for well over a year, I fought coming home so hard simply because I was confused. Was I white or was I Shoshone? Dr. Goodman and others blamed the trauma of being taken away from my family in such a violent manner, and subsequent living conditions, for my refusal to speak English for such a long period of time." Jarrod shook his head knowing why the adults in his life at that time thought what they did, but knowing different. "They didn't know…How could they know when it took years for me to realize myself that I feared speaking English and acting white would mean forgetting…" his voice trailed off as more tears fell down his cheeks.

Nick and Heath might be a lot of things, but stupid wasn't one of them. When Jarrod said forgetting with a look of one longing to go back and "make things right" he wasn't talking about the Shoshone in general. It was something more specific than that. After a few moments of listening to nothing but the wind and the movement of a few small jack rabbits rustling through the grass, Nick grew restless. He wanted to know what was upsetting his brother so much, "Forget what? What were you afraid of forgetting?"

Jarrod stood up and took a few steps forward, his mind on the past. The memories there had haunted him for years afterwards, but…until the Michael's visit…he had hoped they had disappeared. He sighed yet again and turned around. He gave each brother a sad smile and quietly answered Nick's question, though every word that came out of his mouth felt as if someone was taking the sharpest knife they could find and using it on his heart. "I was afraid I'd forget my…." He took a deep breath as another bolt of pain shot through his heart, even after all these years it still hurt. "I was afraid I'd forget Bright Stars…" he paused and then finished, "I was afraid I'd forget Bright Stars…my wife."

A gasp could be heard escaping both Nick and Heath's lips as each found themselves pressing their hands down upon the boulder by which they knelt. Jarrod had been married? That was impossible! "Your wife?" Nick stood up, "I know enough about the Indian cultures here in California to know *****Shoshone men don't marry until they hit twenty, or even mid twenties! How could you be married? You were only fifteen!" Because he was so shocked by the revelation, Nick's bellow was louder than he meant it for it to be, causing Jarrod to take a step backwards.

"That's because, as a general rule, that was when a Shoshone man proved themselves in battle! When I fought in the village that day I not only earned my name, I also proved myself to them…Ibecame a man in their eyes, Nick!" Jarrod barked back the words hard, like they were bullets…the mask he'd worn over "that part of his past" trying to find its way back into its old familiar place. After all, it was the fear of reactions like Nick had just shown that caused him to wear it, the mask, in the first place. That mask would never have come off if he hadn't been caught off guard, nor would he be spilling the beans now. That didn't mean he couldn't stop talking though. And shut down he would…if it meant having Nick or anyone else treat his wife's memory with contempt or scorn.

Heath could see Jarrod was starting to shut down and knew, somehow, he had to keep his oldest brother from doing just that. "Jarrod, please," Heath's voice reached out and turned Jarrod's face away from Nick and onto him, "tell us about her and what happened to her." If his brother had had a wife, he'd never had returned home without her. He wasn't that kind of man. That, along with Jarrod's actions, told him that the young woman he'd married was no longer among the living…but her memory and pain of her loss was embedded deep into Jarrod's soul.

"Please, Jarrod," Nick hurried to apologize for his aggressive outburst. He'd never meant to make Jarrod feel like he was attacking him, and he knew he had, "tell us all about it. How you came to be married so young, about her and how you lost her. We want to know, really." Nick and Heath's sincere desire to hear him out won out.

Jarrod's shoulders slumped as he felt the guilt he'd been carrying around for years pressing itself upon him for the millionth time as the mask crumbled and fell away. Sitting down, Jarrod folded his legs once more and let the wind do what it had done many times before; caress his troubled mind before he started talking once more.

**00000000**

"...Shoshone men **typically** married in their early to mid-20s, depending on their prowess as warriors and their economic viabilities as hunters...

Shoshone women, however, typically married at a younger age, soon after menarche (about 15 or 16 as estimated by anthropologists)..." That is a partial quote from off the internet. This site doesn't allow other links to be posted or I'd have put it here.

A/N... I bolded the word "typically". Since typically implies there were exceptions, Jarrod became one of the exceptions.


	38. Chapter 38

**Man of Justice**

**Chapter Thirty Eight **

_Man of Justice knelt on the roof of the wigwam working to fix a few holes. He had quickly gotten used to his new Shoshone name. In fact, the name Jarrod seemed almost foreign. "Oh, come on," Raging River's Friend had stood on the ground trying to get his friend to leave his work and go on a "short hunting trip" with him and a few of the other young men only moments before. As much as he wanted to, Man of Justice could not bring himself to leave with his task not finished. "I have promised my father I would have this done by tonight." He answered as he knelt back on the heel of his feet and looked down at his friend, "I cannot do that if I go with you." It was the truth, for there was no short hunting trip in that young man's book. Each of the boys in the group had put pressure on him, some of them even taunting, shouting some very unnecessary things. He'd not changed his mind though, and they'd finally turned and walked away. It was only then Man of Justice saw them; Bright Star's father and his father. He wondered if they had overheard what the boys were saying. Man of Justice went back to work knowing that it didn't matter what his friends thought or if the fathers had listened. He had a job to do and he meant to do it._

"_I told you he would take the stand of a man and keep his word to me." Straight Arrow looked at Bright Star's father. "Now will you listen?"_

_Grey Hawk nodded. "He is an exception to the rule for sure. Though, I worry," he looked at Straight Arrow, "are you sure you really want to give him additional responsibility so young?" _

_Straight Arrow turned up the palms of his hands, "He has proven himself in battle and done well enough on the hunts he's done on. He is a man now. It is not good for a man to be alone, even one so young. I have seen the way he looks at your daughter and the way she looks at him. Let us make a marriage agreement between them; it will be good for both of them."_

_Man of Justice could see the two men talking but paid them no mind until his father stood on the ground below calling him down. He wasn't done yet, but he wasn't about to tell his father he was too busy either. Laying down his tools, Man of Justice hurried to get down on the ground and next to his father. "Hin-ah-mus?" _

"What is it?" Jarrod looked at his brothers with a half smile upon his face and chuckled. "Had I known what he wanted I might have stayed up on that roof and never asked such a question." That statement earned a few chuckles from his brothers before and a "I don't blame you" from Nick.

"_What?" Man of Justice sat in the wigwam and stared at his father. Was the man serious? Sure he liked Bright Stars, he'd even hauled water for her a number of times and visited her while doing so. Still to marry her? At his age? If it wasn't for the fact that his father wore such a serious look upon his face, Man of Justice might have thought the man was joking._

"_Very serious, you are a man now and it is not good for a man to be alone. As you know by now, our marriages are arranged. Though, most of the time, I admit the interested man would go talk to the father of the woman he wishes to marry. You have proved to be an exceptional man, and both I and Grey Hawk agree the marriage should be handled with care. You do like her, do you not?" Straight Arrow looked at him daring him to deny what he, Straight Arrow, had seen with his own eyes. The man was not surprised when no such denial was forthcoming._

_**0000**_

_Man of Justice stood in the middle of the camp dressed in the ceremonial clothing Shoshone men wore when taking a bride. Bright Star, who stood only two inches shorter than him, stood in the dress her mother had worn on her wedding day with her long black hair tossed back and forth in the wind. It seemed as the whole village had turned out for the wedding, which due to Bright Star's mother's ill health was taking a mere two days after their father's had talked. After all, the only thing the ailing woman had wanted was to see her daughter married._

_The village's spiritual leader talked while Jarrod couldn't keep his eyes off his bride. If someone had told him when he joined the wagon train that this is where he'd wind up later, he would have never believed them. As it was he was lucky to hear their spiritual leader say, *"Wat-to-mah-mo-re-hi", meaning 'Both of you kiss'. Man of Justice felt as nervous as a jackrabbit corned by a fox as he laid his hands on Bright Stars cheeks and gently brought her mouth up to his. He didn't know if that first kiss was the equivalent to the thunder bolts he'd heard some of the other young men talk about, only thing he knew was he liked it._

_After the ceremony and celebrations, he led her to the wigwam his father, her father, he and others had hurried to put up in the short amount of time they had. It set within a hundred yards of Straight Arrow's. With no one around but Bright Star, Man of Justice and his bride stood as awkwardly as two young people attending their first dance. Having been raised on a ranch, and hearing the talk among the ranch hands, and then the talk among some of the other men in the village, Man of Justice knew what was expected of him. Only problem was, he was far too nervous. _

_Bright Star smiled as her mother had warned her not to expect too much from such a young man. She'd then embarrassed her daughter by getting rather blunt with her, though the woman had apologized afterwards saying she only wished the best for her youngest._

_Man of Justice caught his breath when Bright Star ran her hands up his chest. "We don't have to be perfect," she'd whispered as she slid her arms around his neck and brushed her lips against his saying, "We just have to learn together." That had done him in and he'd lain her down upon the rug that his father had given him._

Jarrod's heart was beating fast as the memory of his wedding night came back to him. He had to close his eyes once more and take another pain filled breath. "Many men think it's their job to teach their wives when it comes to pleasing them, but we had to learn together. Truth is," he opened his eyes and looked at his brothers, pain still clearly in his eyes. "Afterwards, I could never get enough of her and I don't just mean physically. Bright Star turned out to be a great cook, housekeeper and most of all she had a true and pure spirit in her. She was brave and fiery when she needed to be, even stubborn, and I loved her as much as I knew how to back then. She still comes to me in my dreams once in awhile." Neither Nick nor Heath said a word as Jarrod fell into silence, but not until he'd promised to continue the story if they'd just give him a few minutes to regain the control he felt he was losing.

0000

*While I did find out the Shoshone had a spiritual leader married the men and women in their society, I could not find out exactly what takes place. That being the case, I put the traditional kissing the bride in this story. Though, I have heard that it very well could be an English tradition. Just call it the romantic in me.


	39. Chapter 39

**Man of Justice**

**Chapter Thirty Nine**

_Man of Justice stood near the river pulling in his net. He couldn't believe how good life was. Not only was he a married man, but he was doing quite well in providing for his wife, but more importantly the Shoshone had accepted him. The majority of the villagers liked and respected him. He swore up and down he'd never purposely let any of the Shoshone people down. After all, they were his people now._

"_Think you have enough fish." Running River's Friend walked up beside Man of Justice and smiled. "If you're not careful, you'll empty the river and the rest of us will go hungry." That statement made it so that both friends started laughing hard; hard enough that Man of Justice almost let the net slip out of his hand. Of course, that only brought earned him more laughter, not only from Raging River's Friend, but from those who were also fishing near the river._

"_I told my father I would make sure I caught some for him and Spotted Fawn, as they have both been ill. Though," Man of Justice said as he winked at his friend, "If you don't think you can catch enough for you and the rest of your family, I supposed I could spare some." That only served to get him a slap on his arm and a few looks from some of the villagers, though no one was really concerned. After all, they knew Raging River's Friend and Man of Justice were as close as brothers would be._

"_I'll catch enough." Raging River's Friend answered as he saw his sister; now Man of Justice's wife, and her friend coming their way. "I think I best get going." Raging River's Friend turned and hurried off. It was all Man of Justice could do not to laugh. Everyone in the village knew how much Bright Star's friend, Moon Song, like his friend…and how much he disliked the attention she was giving him._

"_I see my dear brother has fled." Bright Star laughed as her husband finished pulling in his net and laid it down long enough to give his wife an embrace, kiss her on the forehead and then stepped back._

"_Yes," he chuckled and answered, "I don't think he knows what to do around a beautiful woman and a pretty girl." Both girls laughed before Moon Song excused herself, as she said her mother would be expecting her home to help with their own family's dinner._

_Unaware that her husband's friend had just finished teasing him, Bright Stars asked as she looked at all the fish in the net, "Do you think you have enough fish?" _

_Man of Justice threw up his hands and feigned disbelief. "Why does everyone seem to think I have the ability to drain this river of all its fish?" _

_Bright Star started laughing as she wrapped her arms around her husband's waist and held on tight for a moment. "You have many abilities, dear husband, though I doubt emptying the river is one of them." Neither one said anything else for at least five minutes. Both were lost in what felt like heaven as they held onto each other and listened as the river rolled by them. Only when Man of Justice let out a sigh was the peaceful feeling interrupted. _

"_I have work to do and fish to deliver." He pulled and smiled at his wife. "Tomorrow there is little for me to do. We will spend the day together, just the two of us." He then planted a kiss on her lips before going back to work, making sure he caught twice as much fish again; just to be sure he could keep his word the following day._

_**0000**_

_The wind was once again blowing through the Shoshone village and the area around it. The majority of men, women and children were going about their daily business. However, in the wigwam belonging to Man of Justice and Bright Star, daily life was being put on hold. "I think my dear husband, there is no satisfying you." Bright Star laughed as she and Man of Just lay underneath the new bear rug she had finished making from the skin he'd brought her after going on hunt with Straight Arrow and her father._

_Man of Justice leaned up on his elbow and looked down at his wife, chuckling as he did so. He could plead innocence, only he figured she had enough evidence to convict him. "Yes, there is. You satisfy me all the time. In our bed, when you're cooking, even when you have the nerve to be right and I have to wind up climbing up to fix a hole up there." He pointed to the roof over his head. "Though, if you wish to say different I will just have to throw myself at your feet and beg for mercy." His winked at her and laughed. It only served to get his wife to laughing just as hard._

_When their laughter died down, Bright Star ran her finger over his shoulders and asked quietly. "Father says he has asked you to go on another hunt with him." She tried not to sound negative or fearful as she made the statement, only it was hard to do when she'd been feeling uneasy ever since her father had told her of the new hunting trip._

_Man of Justice said nothing at first; he simply ran his fingers lovingly over her shoulder blade. They'd only been married two months and he hated the idea of leaving her even for a couple of days. Slowly he nodded his head. "I am your husband. I need to provide for you and your father wants someone to go with him. It would only be for a couple of days. I'll come straight home after the hunt. I promise."_

_Bright Star may have had the same uncomfortable feeling come over he, but she also knew he was right. He was her husband and she had no right to try and get him to stay away from the hunt. "When do the two of you leave?" Her eyes held a look of desire as she whispered, "I don't want you at my feet."_

_Man of Justice lowered his head, chuckling as he did so, "I don't think I'm the one who can't be satisfied and I don't have to leave until tomorrow. We have the rest of the day together and no work that can't wait." As slow as he took his time, Man of Justice would have gone ten times slower had he known it would be the last time he would lay with his wife._


	40. Chapter 40

**Man of Justice**

**Chapter Forty**

_The sun was shining bright, seeping through the few fluffy white clouds in the otherwise brilliant blue sky. Man of Justice walked alongside his father-in-law listening to the man's stories about his childhood. Naturally, the stories ranged from anything from happy memories to sad ones. Their hunt had gone well and both had meat for their loved ones. "You are a good hunter, my son." Grey Fox also called him "my son"; Man of Justice was convinced it was a term all older men applied to men young enough to be their sons. "Though, in time, you will become even better at it." Man of Justice had to smirk at the older man's quip because he'd scared their game off more than once. _

"_I am a married man providing for a wife and helping his parents and yet, sometimes, I feel like such a boy." Man of Justice looked at Grey Fox. "Will it ever change?" He didn't know why he asked such a thing, but he did. His father-in-law only smiled._

"_You might be an exception to the rule my son, but you are still young." Grey Fox patted his shoulder. "Give yourself time; you will learn." Their conversation might have continued on as they drew the village but it was interrupted as Raging River's Friend ran towards them full force, anguish written all over his face._

"_What is wrong?" Man of Justice asked his brother-in-law, though he got the sickest feeling as he did so. While Grey Fox had the same feeling, he did not show it like his son-in-law._

_That was a question his friend wished with all his heart he did not have to answer. After all, the day had started out so good with his people going about their business as usual with no sign of trouble. Why did trouble have to hit their village? Could people not live in peace for more than a short period without acting like a group of little children? That was the question Raging River's Friend had asked himself on more than once occasion. _

"_Our enemies," Raging River's Friend paused as he caught his breath, and then went on. "They crossed the mountains and attacked the village. We have driven them out, but," he looked at Man of Justice as the anguish in his eyes grew, "Bright Stars has been wounded. She received two arrows in her back just minutes ago. It does not look good, my brother. You must hurry; she is calling out for you." He was not surprised in the least when a look of horror spread over his brother-in-law and father's faces. He could bring himself to say that his sister was dying. Though, he didn't have to. The reflection in his father's and Man of Justice's eyes, and the pain written on their faces, was only a reflection of what he, himself, was feeling._

"_No!" Man of Justice screamed as he took off running with his father in law was not far behind him. Neither one wanted to believe Bright Stars was injured that badly. When his wigwam came into view, Man of Justice saw Straight Arrow talking to one of the braves. Others were walking around solemn and tearful…one woman was even heard to say how they might have to find another place for their village._

_Straight Arrow's heart went out at the sight of his son running towards him. He tried to stop him but Man of Justice simply ran past his father and into his wigwam. Man of Justice's heart stopped dead in its tracks as the Medicine Man stood up and stepped away from Bright Star's side allowing her husband to sit down beside her. Her weak smile tore at her husband's heart._

"_I was on my way home." Man of Justice felt tears fighting to escape as he spoke in a pain filled voice, "I was coming." He winced, his heart was breaking as Bright Star lifted her hand up a wiped away the tears on his cheek._

"_I knew you were." She whispered. "You are a man of your word. As far as I understand what love is…I do love you, Man of Justice." Bright Star grasped his hand even tighter as she was in great deal of pain. Still, she managed to speak again. "I will always love you. Hold me, please!" She cried out as things around her began to disappear, "please hold me!"_

_Man of Justice quickly slid his arms underneath her shoulders and raised her up, holding her close to his bare chest. "Don't go, Bright Star, don't go. I got home as soon as I could." His tears were falling like rain as he pleaded for his wife to stay within him. _

"_I love you…" Bright Star's words trailed off and she was gone._

"I should have been there!" Jarrod reached down, grabbed handful of small rocks and threw them as hard as he could. "I didn't have to go on the hunt! The next morning her brother said he'd go if I wanted to stay home, but I was too full of fool pride! I told him she was my wife and I'd be the one to provide for her! If I'd been there, their enemies never would have been able to get near her!" He was screaming by now, his shoulders started shaking as he began sobbing again. "I had felt like a man all those months, been treated like a man, lived like a man, but at that time…when I begged for her to live.. I never felt loss like that. It might not have been the same as a man that loses a wife he'd loved for years would feel; still..." his voice grew soft as he again repeated, "I should have been there."

Sympathy for their brother swelled up in Nick and Heath's eyes as Nick wrapped his arms around Jarrod and held him tight, Heath kept his hand on Jarrod's back. "Maybe, Maybe not. Who knows, maybe you both might have been killed." Heath spoke softly as he fought to keep his own emotions in check. "Either way, it looks like you've been carrying a lot of guilt around that ain't yours to carry."

Nick nodded and held on tighter. "Listen to him, Pappy. Life ain't fair. It just isn't, but it wasn't you who put those arrows into Bright Star's back. You ain't the one who killed her. Let the guilt and pain of not being able to protect her go; you can do that without forgetting her."

Jarrod's reply was so soft they almost didn't hear it. "I don't know how."

Heath's small lopsided grin appeared on his face as he spoke one small sentence. "Let your family help you."

**Epilogue to follow**


	41. Epilogue

**Man of Justice**

**Epilogue**

_Jarrod's reply was so soft they almost didn't hear it. "I don't know how."_

_Heath's small lopsided grin appeared on his face as he spoke one small sentence. "Let your family help you."_

By the time they rode into *Paradise, all of the Barkleys were more than ready to get off their horses, though Jarrod didn't move off his saddle until Nick reached up, tapped his arm and gave him a sympathetic smile. "Time got get down, Pappy." Jarrod sent a slight, somewhat irritated, smile his brother's way. He was still not in love with that term, but never argued with his brothers using it either. He grabbed a hold of the horn of his saddle and dismounted.

Jarrod looked around. Paradise was still a small, quiet town, though he dared say it had one or two more occupants than it had back in 1858. A melochany feeling swept over him; it had been so many years and so many memories came flooding back to him. He still remembered the first day he'd actually come to town With Straight Arrow. He was speaking Shoshone quite well. Looking back at it, Jarrod was amazed he hadn't walked up to one of the men or women and simply told them the truth and asked them to send word to his family. Then again, he sighed, he was thinking of himself as Shoshone by that time.

Seeing his brother tense up for a quick second, Heath asked, "You okay, Jarrod?" He hoped it had not been a mistake in bringing his brother back to this place, even if their mother had suggested it as a way for her oldest to get some closure.

Jarrod's only answer was to head for the small boarding house that he saw at the end of town. After checking in and getting rooms for themselves, the Barkleys remounted their horses and rode silently out to Feather River. Other than one or two frames of former wigwams, **very few signs of the village existed anymore.

Once or twice, one of the Barkleys would make a comment or ask question, but for the most part no one talked. They seemed to know that the oldest Barkley son simply needed them to be with him as he walked around in the area that he had once called home. Jarrod found and walked the trail his mind and heart had never been able to forget, his family continued to follow behind him. What else was there to do? There was nothing to be done, but be there for him.

When Jarrod froze in his tracks and stared at the shell of a small wigwam with a mixture of relief and pain, they all took a wild guess, but it was Nick who voiced it. "Is that where you lived when you came here or where you and Bright Star lived?" It still boggled this brother's mind that Jarrod had been married at the mere age of fifteen.

Jarrod didn't answer at first; he simply let one memory after another race through his mind. Finally, after what seemed like an eternity turned his head so he could see his family, "It belonged to my Shoshone Father. The wigwam that was built for Bright Star and me was set over in that area." He pointed off to his left and then started walking in that direction only stopping when he felt as if someone had reached out and taken a hold of him. In a way he couldn't explain, Jarrod knew at the moment Bright Stars was standing beside him doing what she could to help him put things behind him for good.

"It's beautiful here." Audra spoke up. She'd loved what she saw the moment they reached the area, but had been afraid of saying anything out of fear she would initiate sad memories and upset her brother.

"It was my home," Jarrod turned around and looked at his family, "but, looking back on it, I never really enjoyed the beauty of this place as much as I might have because I wasn't with my real family. It was a fact at the time I suppose out of necessity I pushed to the back of my mind." He looked at Nick with remorse in his eyes, "I never meant for any of you to get hurt. I especially never meant to make a small child feel like he wasn't being listened to." That fact had also haunted him for years, the fact that Nick had tried so hard to get everyone to listen to him only to be ignored.

Nick felt a lump in his throat and swallowed hard as he again embraced his brother. "Told you none of this was your fault, never will be. Just," he pulled back and looked Jarrod straight in the eye, "don't get any ideas about inviting Jacob back onto the ranch. I meant what I said, I'll work on forgiving him because of his refusal to leave prison early, but I don't want him on our land!" He received no protest as Jarrod began leading them from one place to another telling them everything he could remember. He told them of the hunting trips with his friends and Shoshone father, and then his father-in-law. He also spoke of the games, along with the dances around the large communal fires. The friendships he'd made and the respect he had for the Shoshone people and the respect he'd earned from them were also on the list of things he talked about. The whole time Jarrod spoke, he could feel his late wife by his side encouraging him when he would choke up and want to quit talking.

When he finished speaking there was a reverent silence until Victoria broke it. "If I had to lose my son for a time," she said as she laid her hand against his upper arm, "I am grateful you were watched over by such a good man and good people." From other stories she'd heard over the years, she knew the story could have been just the opposite. By the time Jarrod and his family left the area he could have sworn he heard Bright Stars say "Go in peace, Man of Justice". For the first time in years a genuine smile spread across Jarrod's face. Life was good and he was fine.

**0000000**

*Author's note: I have been unable to find out exactly when the town Pair of Dice changed its name to Paradise. That being the case, for the sake of the story, by the time the 1870's roll around the name has been changed. **By the 1870's all the Shoshone were on reservations; that is, from what I could tell from all the research I did they were.


End file.
